Betrayal...

[OutOfOrder]

Hey,

So I recently found out that my best friend has been talking about me negatively to his parents and my other friends. He told me a while ago that he thought of me as his best friend, so I do know that he at least once had a good opinion of me. Anyway, so he told people that I go to a "stupid" school and that I am jealous of my brother who went to a much better school. The thing is, I am always the one who talks about how great my brother is and how I want to be like him. I've never said anything bad about him before. I'm wondering where this idea came from and why my friend might be telling people about this behind my back. I'm pretty sure that nothing went wrong between us since he told me I was his best friend, so I really can't figure out why.

Has this ever happened to anyone else here? How should I approach this? I'm going to meet him tomorrow at this party and I really want to get this settled before it becomes something bigger. Any help would be awesome!

Thanks!
-OutOfOrder-

[Scarface]

Puberty For Boys :arrow2: Friends & Family

More relevant replies here.

[Roses_Are_Yellow]

That sounds like what happened to me in the last month! I told my friend to shut the beep up after she had kept complaining, and being so negative, and then I turned around and said im so sick of this beep, but it wasn't directed towards her. She told people that I cursed her out to the point of tears (she didn't shed one tear). She kept telling people how mad at me she was, how i was a bad friends. Plus, she was telling lies about me. Then a week later, I leave and all of sudden she keeps telling people that she misses me, and then all of a sudden we're best friends....in her dreams maybe, but in real life. Heck NO.

..sorry, just still mad...

Anyway, what im doing is that im avoiding any face to face contact with her, but im still talking to her on facebook and text. Personally, I think you should just come straight out and tell him you heard he was talking about you in a negative way.

If he's anything like my so called" friend" he'll probably talk about you more, and make more lies. But, do you think you want to keep him as friend if he's doing this stuff to you?

[OutOfOrder]

Hey,

Thanks for the reply! I mean I am really close to this guy. We literally grew up together for the past couple years (through puberty) and we've gotten very close emotionally and physically. So I mean I think losing him would be a pretty big blow to me.

I'm just wondering if this has something to do with the friend that told me. He knows that me and my best friend are super close. He actually asked me if we were going out because he saw us both poking each other and him sitting on me sometimes. (We're both not gay as far as I know). Do you think it has to do with the friend that told me about this? My best friend isn't the type to tell people lies like this even when he is really mad about something. It just doesn't seem like him.

Any thoughts or suggestions about what I should do? Anyone else felt this kind of feeling before and have any ways to deal with it? I'm going to try to talk to my friend about it soon. Hopefully.

Thanks,
-OutOfOrder-

[Roses_Are_Yellow]

Hmmm... that would be harder loosing him since you guys grew up together. You should just talk to him about it. Just wondering, but which one is more...credible?

[Spook]

I think talking is the best solution. Talk to him and tell his about what you heard. It may not even be true! :D

Here is a tip: When talking to him, don't be defensive, and put yourself in his shoes. Instead of the words: You make me so angry, or You are being so mean, say: I feel bad when you.... or I don't feel good about myself when you...

[brennaluvv]

He's probably jealous of you! Maybe you should confront him about it and if he acts like a jerk, then maybe you should just tell him bye and that you can find a better friend than him... I know how you feel my best friend does this to me all the time to her boyfriend to make herself look really cool. It's stupid and hurtful, but it can't be ignored. What I usually do when I find out that she's backstabbing me, is confrontation. Make sure you make eye contact and treat it as a serious situation and let him know that this hurts you and it needs to stop.