Does Age Really Matter? Help.

[Grayeyes]

Does age really matter? I had a relationship before with a guy and he was four years older than me. It didn't last long. And i realized after a while he just used me. I guess for his own amusement. And he didn't actually love me.

We were best friends before that relationship so, i thought he was someone to trust and he wouldn't use me. But i guess not.

Was it our age gap? Did he think that i was just a kid and that i'm naive so he can just do what he wanted? And thought i wouldn't mind? Or, was he just really a jerk? Do guys really mind the age gap? Even if it wasn't even that big of a gap? (and he was my best friend too)

Don't say that he only thought of us as friends because, he was the one who asked if he could kiss me and all that. He was the one who had made the first move and not me.

I need guys and also girls' opinion on this...

Because for me, it doesn't matter how big your age gap is (as long as he's not old enough to be your dad... Haha) as long as you love him and trust him. And he makes you happy, and of course if he feels the same, right?

[Kaius]

I don't think it was the age gap no, he's just a jerk by the sounds of it. As for minding the age gap its each to their own, my girlfriend is 3 years younger than me but it doesn't really affect anything. I go by that last line as well, as long as the gap isn't too big at a young age and as long as they make you happy then whats the problem?

[FullyAlive]

That guy just doesn't sound nice and i highly doubt it was the age gap that was the reason it was most probably just him.
I personally abide by the "two-year rule" at least as far as relationships go not so much if its someone you just want to get with. However it really depends on how old you are. Once you are in your twenties a few years is nothing no one would think anything of a 23 yr old and a 28 yr old on the other hand a 13yr old and a 18 yr old. Not so much. Although at of the day it's you in the relationship not society so it should be what feels comfortable.

[Grayeyes]

I tried being friends with him again a couple of times. But it just wouldn't work anymore. I guess that just means, it's not worth it. Move on.

Thank you guys. :)
I kinda really needed that confirmation. This makes me feel much better.

+1 rep for taking time to reply to my first thread. I thought no one would. Teehee.

[MesutOzil]

Age is just a number...

i think he is just a jerk he used u... u just need to forget him and start searching for another guy

i think if u get a new bf and get better in everything maybe he will know how much u worth and he will feel a pain for breaking up with u..:)

[Ambrosia]

Why did you try and end this thread so quick? You barely gave it a day to last! So even though you're trying to be done, I'm replying anyways.

Four years is a very common age gap between couples. Most parents I see, and most teenagers I see, are usually females and males with a three to four year age difference. But you always have to consider that men are often times still four years younger in their head so it can contribute to him being an asshole.

[Grayeyes]

Age is just a number...

i think he is just a jerk he used u... u just need to forget him and start searching for another guy

i think if u get a new bf and get better in everything maybe he will know how much u worth and he will feel a pain for breaking up with u..:)

Haha, like, sweet revenge? :P
I think I'll wait for the moment. And be a bit more careful when another guy comes along...
Thank you for your kind support :)

[Grayeyes]

Haha, like, sweet revenge? :P
I think I'll wait for the moment. And be a bit more careful when another guy comes along...
Thank you :)

PS: I don't know what happened to my first post... But that was supposed to be a reply to MesutOzil.

Why did you try and end this thread so quick? You barely gave it a day to last! So even though you're trying to be done, I'm replying anyways.

Four years is a very common age gap between couples. Most parents I see, and most teenagers I see, are usually females and males with a three to four year age difference. But you always have to consider that men are often times still four years younger in their head so it can contribute to him being an asshole.

I wasn't ending it yet, haha. Sorry if it sounded like it :P
Yeah, He was really immature and really confusing at times. Some times he wouldn't wanna talk to me then next, he'd be asking why I'm not talking to him? :| (and he was supposedly already 17)
Yet again, I was also very immature and I guess that contributed to the not so good relationship... and I guess I was even the slightliest naive too. I should've known he was using me. He wasn't over his ex yet.
anyway, I will now officially get over it.
I'm over it.

Thanks for the concern :)

[Exist]

Half your age +7.

[Horse_girl]

Because for me, it doesn't matter how big your age gap is (as long as he's not old enough to be your dad... Haha) as long as you love him and trust him. And he makes you happy, and of course if he feels the same, right?

Right! However, unfortunately that's not always the case. There are some guys that will use girls that are younger than them because. For example, there has been a trend at my school for certain senior guys to date freshman girls. And I know that in the majority of those cases, it has nothing to do with love. They date them because they know the freshman girls will be willing to do anything.

I don't know how old the two of you were, but there's a chance he probably would've used you no matter what the age gap was. Some guys are jerks that'll use girls. Any guy that really loves you won't notice the age gap at all and would never think to use you. And they're out there, trust me. :)

[The Madness.]

I don't think it was the age gap seeing as you were best friends before then. If the age difference mattered, he most likely wouldn't have even become close friends.

I think age doesn't matter, most of the time. It depends what the stage of your life you're at at the time is. If you're 11-14, dating say.. someone 5 years older isn't a good thing. As you grow up more and mature, I think age is no problem as long as it's love and not just going into the relationship to screw around. Simple as.

[Grayeyes]

I don't think it was the age gap seeing as you were best friends before then. If the age difference mattered, he most likely wouldn't have even become close friends.

I think age doesn't matter, most of the time. It depends what the stage of your life you're at at the time is. If you're 11-14, dating say.. someone 5 years older isn't a good thing. As you grow up more and mature, I think age is no problem as long as it's love and not just going into the relationship to screw around. Simple as.

Yeah, i thought it was "love" or maybe i just made myself think it was...
i hope i do grow up more mature. and i guess, think things through more. him too.
thanks. :)

Right! However, unfortunately that's not always the case. There are some guys that will use girls that are younger than them because. For example, there has been a trend at my school for certain senior guys to date freshman girls. And I know that in the majority of those cases, it has nothing to do with love. They date them because they know the freshman girls will be willing to do anything.

I don't know how old the two of you were, but there's a chance he probably would've used you no matter what the age gap was. Some guys are jerks that'll use girls. Any guy that really loves you won't notice the age gap at all and would never think to use you. And they're out there, trust me. :)

Yes! That is exactly how it was! At first it really felt like he really liked me (if not loved) so, i went with it. Then after a while, It started feeling like he was just with me because he thought "oh, i was barely through my teen years" and that i was naive. (which was actually sort of true because i just let him use me)
He wasn't really over his break up with this other girl. It was like i was just his rebound...

He used to send me texts from time to time. I used to text him back before. And as usual, after every time I text back, he wouldn't be interested in having a conversation anymore. I don't know what's wrong with this guys.

Just yesterday, he texted me again. I didn't reply.
Should I still try being friends with him again?
In my opinion, i don't think so... it's like he's just messing with me. :| wth...

Thanks Horse_girl :)

[Grayeyes]

Half your age +7.

What do you mean? :P

[Horse_girl]

Yes! That is exactly how it was! At first it really felt like he really liked me (if not loved) so, i went with it. Then after a while, It started feeling like he was just with me because he thought "oh, i was barely through my teen years" and that i was naive. (which was actually sort of true because i just let him use me)
He wasn't really over his break up with this other girl. It was like i was just his rebound...

He used to send me texts from time to time. I used to text him back before. And as usual, after every time I text back, he wouldn't be interested in having a conversation anymore. I don't know what's wrong with this guys.

Just yesterday, he texted me again. I didn't reply.
Should I still try being friends with him again?
In my opinion, i don't think so... it's like he's just messing with me. :| wth...

Thanks Horse_girl :)

You're welcome. :) Personally I wouldn't try to be friends with him again. Plenty of other much nicer people out there that you don't have to worry about wanting to use you for something.

[Grayeyes]

^ Thanks. :)