ehh those old thoughts again

[restricted NA]

Well recently, I have been good about not thinking of suicide and what not. But today was just bad, everyone in my class laughed at me when I said the incorrect thing in spanish. I literally felt like i was going to cry. But I kept them in, breathing deeply. It was finally lunch and I was sitting in the sun with my class, it was hot out and still my body felt so cold. For some reason with this cold felling came the suicidal thoughts again, pill overdose .... really bad :P i know. I just don't know how to stop these feelings. Someday they might end up killing me. These thoughts come off and on, but I've began not having the desire to talk to people. I really want to be happy, but for some reason sometimes I believe that will all be possible with a new one.

[Fiction]

I have exactly the same thoughts. I strongly advise getting help because I did act on them, and it was honestly the most horrible experience of my life. I overdosed and ended up in hospital. That was the first my parents knew about any of this, and it was the worst way for them to find out. I ended up getting help, but it'd have been so much easier and less traumatic to have told them and ask for help. I know it's hard but it's easier than going through that.

[restricted NA]

Thank you so much, I think i do need help :)

[Fiction]

Then don't be afraid to ask for it, it'll be for the best in the long run :)

[Blujay]

I feel like this sometimes, too. When it's like carrying everything isn't worth it anymore. Why not just drop it all, be done with it? Because even if you don't want to keep living, someone else out there does want you to. Think of how devastated your friends and family would be.
And what if you kill yourself today, and the person who could've made it all better comes along tomorrow?
If you can't live for today... live for tomorrow. That's my policy, personally. I know it's not much, but it's something.