Relapsed

[BelieveInMex]

Long story short. I've been cutting for 9 years. I was recently able to stop. Was going on 9 months. Thing's have been so stressful around here that I just couldn't take it. So I did it, and then again another day when things got stressful. I use to think I could be strong and not be able to do it. I was so addicted to cutting. I hate it, yet I love it. My mom and best friend are the only ones who "knew" about it. I can't tell them. I just can't take everything that's been happening anymore. I feel trapped, lost and alone. I feel weak now. How do I stop? Or make it not become so addicting. I don't remember how I stopped. I just did. By myself with no help. It was so hard, and I don't want to go through that again. Any advice?

[TheSleepingInsomniac]

wow 9 months is amazing
i think the best way to start recovering is identify what makes you feel like cutting then identify what makes you feel better even the littlest bit better

[georgiamay]

The fact that you went 9 months is enough for you to know that you can get there again. Everyone slips up every now and then, we fall so we can learn to pick ourselves back up again. You went 9 months, which proves you can go another 9 months, but maybe this time, aim for 12 months? And once you've reached a goal, push the goal back.

Also, maybe getting organised over it could help. For me, counting the days helps, and it gives me the motivation to keep going, so when I get to 7 days, I think, "I want to get to double figures." Maybe a calender or something? Mark on a calender every day that you don't self harm. If you're like me and refuse to fail at something if you've spent ages organising it, maybe it'll help.

[BelieveInMex]

Lumosity- Thanks! And, I do it when I get really stressed. When I feel I have no way out and no where to go to "calm" myself. Which has been happening a lot lately. :/


georgiamay- Thanks' for the advice. I'll try that. I've got real bad anxiety. My nephews and niece might be taken away by the state because my sister is stupid. My dad has cancer. Work is really stressful. Well, not working itself, but my company I work for is. I am only there for a couple more months though. I've learned to deal with one or two problems on it own, but it just seems like everything keeps throwing itself at me and not giving me time to breathe. I guess that's why I went back to cutting because it was my comfort zone for so long. I'll try your advice though. Thank you!