I'm not depressed but nothing is going right for me at the moment

[theoburray]

Before I start I know my problems aren't tragic but they're still problems, I don't compare it to any deaths, illnesses or any disaster where people have REAL problems. I'm generally a happy person (inside), not superannoying happy but I've never been depressed or gloomy.

So yeah like I say my problems aren't something like the law, getting beat up by parents or anything but it's probably on a personal level the biggest problems I've had in my adult life (and certainly not the biggest problems I'll ever have).

Firstly I'm 19 and have never been in a relationship, that is mostly because I didn't ask a girl out for the first time until about 3 months ago, never kissed a girl either (yeah I'm being legit). I've had autism as a child so I'm very **** when it comes to meeting/talking to people I don't know for the initial conversation, once I know them I'm great.

First girl I asked out was someone from work, it looked good. She said yes but she never committed, she gives me mixed signals all the time and I know she acts different towards me than other guys at work and isn't just being friendly. (She isn't a mean person and I think it's because she's very comfortable around me now, she does not realise it hurts me). So I gave up on her officially at the start of the week (I asked her out again in Mid March then didn't see her till last week). She never responds to texts so I gave up, sucks because I still have to see her and she always starts a conversation when I see her.

The other girl was one in a nightclub who gave me her number a few months back, bascially we've been in contact in the last month via fb/texting and I thought she'd at least agree to this. She never answers her phone but she does respond to texts so I asked her out for a coffee...no reply, **** I wish they'd rather say no but I suppose I should wait 24 hours before I know if there's nothing there. It definitely sent.

I'm behind on my uni work (it's tough dealing with social life/work/uni but yes it's my fault) and that's very stressful, I'm sure I'll end up doing fine but it isn't fun at the moment.

I pissed off one of my best female friends for not going to a party she and a few other good mates were going to (one of my good mates brothers party) because I went to the city with my best mates instead. The other night I went to a club with a few mates (including her) but she ignored me the whole night, didn't say a word. Even greeted a guy she says she does not like, by the way she isn't a girlfriend or anything, she has a boyfriend who I'm really good friends with.

My best mates came around to my house to watch the ufc pay per view and they were annoying me cos they were mimicking the moves and stuff (my parents were in their room) and wouldn't shut up, they are really my best mates but I don't want them round my house if they go on like that. I didn't say anything, I'm glad they took the hint to leave cos with all this on my mind I couldn't be ****** with them.

The thing going right is work...oh unless I see her there. Not sure what to do in terms of the girls thing, I've never asked someone out in my life and now I'm 0-2, I was happier before I got into asking out girls cos this sucks especially when you think they have an interest in you. I've given up on girls for 2011 because of it, just gonna be single cbf with mind games anymore.

[sarah newman]

I think you should have a bit of a break from girls - not give up on them- but you should hang out with your mates more, because you don't deserve to be treated in that way. Try and get to know girls and then try and see if you can see a future with them, without rushing into things.
Also, try an catch up with your work, not getting involved with girls will help, maybe focus on girls after uni?
Good luck with your future, I'm always here so if you wanna message me and we can talk? :)

[slappy]

That's life, as frank Sinatra would say
Hint hint, good song to listen to when you're down

[theoburray]

I think you should have a bit of a break from girls - not give up on them- but you should hang out with your mates more, because you don't deserve to be treated in that way. Try and get to know girls and then try and see if you can see a future with them, without rushing into things.
Also, try an catch up with your work, not getting involved with girls will help, maybe focus on girls after uni?
Good luck with your future, I'm always here so if you wanna message me and we can talk? :)

Well I don't finish Uni until I'm 21 so if I see a girl I really like again (which I doubt, I'm very picky and don't just fall for someone easily) I'll probably try and reduce the amount of time it takes to ask her out, hopefully this rejection makes it easier for me to ask someone out.

[sarah newman]

Just take things slow and you will be fine. Go at your own pace, what I said was just my opinion of what you should do, it's up to you whether you wanna pay attention to it or not. :)

[theoburray]

Just take things slow and you will be fine. Go at your own pace, what I said was just my opinion of what you should do, it's up to you whether you wanna pay attention to it or not. :)

Only thing is once I finish uni I'll have a full time job so I need to learn all these things before I really am an adult in all senses of the word :p

[sarah newman]

When you get a full time job you should be ready for this kinda stuff :)

[iamlauren]

Hey, don't worry. I can't tell you everything's going to be ok, but try thinking about the positive stuff. You should try reading some of my posts on this site; my life sucks. At least you don't cut, you're not gay, and your parents don't hate you. Well, I only cut for three days until my friend saw and made me stop or she would tell. But still, don't worry. You're only nineteen and you still have your whole life ahead of you. And don't feel bad because you haven't kissed anyone or been on a date yet. Neither have I, although i'm only fourteen. Just live life to it's fullest. And if people ignore you and don't text you, well, don't apologize, but try and do something to get them back on your good side.

[theoburray]

Another saturday night inside...ughhhh.

The worst thing for me is I'm 19 turning 20 this year, these are the years I want to have fun and cherish before I have to become a mature and serious adult. I mean it's already 1.5 years or so before I have a full time job, that's scary.

Not many people dislike me, I don't do anything to piss people off. At high school I was generally liked I think by everyone, I didn't belong to a specific clique but the worst thing for me is I can probably count on my hands how many people I call my friends and even then, they're busy as fuck. One has a girlfriend, One works at weird hours (Two do actually I think) and what sucks is even though we are best friends, they all have their own sub unit of friends to do things with. I'd love to go out every weekend, I love partying and stuff but I have no one to go with, I have to resort to going to a local place if one of my friends is going and it's just pissing me off.

I've already established my friendships/associations with people from high school so that isn't going to change. There must be something about me where people like talking to me and stuff but don't want to be friends with me in the truest sense of the word. I have the same interests as most teenagers and I'm not ugly, fat or anything. I wear glasses but big deal so do a lot of people.

That female friend from the first post is still pissed off at me most likely but I'm too stubborn to apologise, I'd rather see her face to face and apologise than put it in a text or facebook. Even calling her seems cowardly. But I don't see why I should have to apologise. She is sort of part of a second group of friends I have which involves her, her boyfriend (one of my good mates as well) and another good mate and they do stuff as a trio or her and my mate (the non bf) and I don't get pissed off or shitty about that.

I'll never get a girlfriend at the rate I'm going, even if I did I'd be very embarassed when they know about my true social life. They probably assume I'm going out all the time and stuff because they have a very, very active social life but most likely on a Saturday Night I'm at home not doing much.

[slappy]

Another saturday night inside...ughhhh.

The worst thing for me is I'm 19 turning 20 this year, these are the years I want to have fun and cherish before I have to become a mature and serious adult. I mean it's already 1.5 years or so before I have a full time job, that's scary.

Not many people dislike me, I don't do anything to piss people off. At high school I was generally liked I think by everyone, I didn't belong to a specific clique but the worst thing for me is I can probably count on my hands how many people I call my friends and even then, they're busy as fuck. One has a girlfriend, One works at weird hours (Two do actually I think) and what sucks is even though we are best friends, they all have their own sub unit of friends to do things with. I'd love to go out every weekend, I love partying and stuff but I have no one to go with, I have to resort to going to a local place if one of my friends is going and it's just pissing me off.

I've already established my friendships/associations with people from high school so that isn't going to change. There must be something about me where people like talking to me and stuff but don't want to be friends with me in the truest sense of the word. I have the same interests as most teenagers and I'm not ugly, fat or anything. I wear glasses but big deal so do a lot of people.

That female friend from the first post is still pissed off at me most likely but I'm too stubborn to apologise, I'd rather see her face to face and apologise than put it in a text or facebook. Even calling her seems cowardly. But I don't see why I should have to apologise. She is sort of part of a second group of friends I have which involves her, her boyfriend (one of my good mates as well) and another good mate and they do stuff as a trio or her and my mate (the non bf) and I don't get pissed off or shitty about that.

I'll never get a girlfriend at the rate I'm going, even if I did I'd be very embarassed when they know about my true social life. They probably assume I'm going out all the time and stuff because they have a very, very active social life but most likely on a Saturday Night I'm at home not doing much.



Go out and find friends dude, don't stay home and feel sorry for yourself. Happiness is a choice, you make your own happiness only you can change things in your life. Go and find new friends and hang out with them.

[anonymous53]

Another saturday night inside...ughhhh.

The worst thing for me is I'm 19 turning 20 this year, these are the years I want to have fun and cherish before I have to become a mature and serious adult. I mean it's already 1.5 years or so before I have a full time job, that's scary.

Not many people dislike me, I don't do anything to piss people off. At high school I was generally liked I think by everyone, I didn't belong to a specific clique but the worst thing for me is I can probably count on my hands how many people I call my friends and even then, they're busy as fuck. One has a girlfriend, One works at weird hours (Two do actually I think) and what sucks is even though we are best friends, they all have their own sub unit of friends to do things with. I'd love to go out every weekend, I love partying and stuff but I have no one to go with, I have to resort to going to a local place if one of my friends is going and it's just pissing me off.

I've already established my friendships/associations with people from high school so that isn't going to change. There must be something about me where people like talking to me and stuff but don't want to be friends with me in the truest sense of the word. I have the same interests as most teenagers and I'm not ugly, fat or anything. I wear glasses but big deal so do a lot of people.

That female friend from the first post is still pissed off at me most likely but I'm too stubborn to apologise, I'd rather see her face to face and apologise than put it in a text or facebook. Even calling her seems cowardly. But I don't see why I should have to apologise. She is sort of part of a second group of friends I have which involves her, her boyfriend (one of my good mates as well) and another good mate and they do stuff as a trio or her and my mate (the non bf) and I don't get pissed off or shitty about that.

I'll never get a girlfriend at the rate I'm going, even if I did I'd be very embarassed when they know about my true social life. They probably assume I'm going out all the time and stuff because they have a very, very active social life but most likely on a Saturday Night I'm at home not doing much.
Why are you limited to these friends? Go out dude, have some fun. Meet new people. Are there any clubs around that aren't bars? Go bowling, introduce yourself to people. Just have fun, don't worry about others.

[theoburray]

Why are you limited to these friends? Go out dude, have some fun. Meet new people. Are there any clubs around that aren't bars? Go bowling, introduce yourself to people. Just have fun, don't worry about others.

Because I can only go out to clubs and stuff with my friends, my problem is I have way too many associates/people I get along with and not enough friends. Too many 'friends' who I will see at clubs but not actually go there with, it's annoying and I want a much more lively social life but not many people want me to go anywhere with them even we get along. It's not fair in a way. I mean hopefully once I'm in a relationship hopefully it picks up but in my situation it's hard to find a relationship and the two girls I have tried to get in a relationship with I've failed with.