Are Therapists or Parents Better?

[NobodysCupOf Tea]

Now after reading a few your posts its obvious that a lot of you turn to your therapists to help you with various problems, including cutting and self harm.

Now i don't have a therapist, i have my parents, which has its pros and cons;

I guess it's good that my parents want to help me, but they can only help me to a certain extent. For one i cant tell them everything, i just can't. When they asked me that all old question of 'why?' i could only blame my stress with school work, without including the many other aspects which all contribute to my cutting.

Personally i think that a therapist could help a bit, just by talking, i think that would open up some doors for me.

My parents reason for not considering turning to a therapist is that it would go on my personal file, therefore universities and future employees will be able to see that i've had therapy.

Now what is everyones opinion?

is it worth having a short term therapy for long term support? i don't know what to think anymore.....

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[Nevermore]

Therapy has helped me more then my parents. My parents would yell at me, and make fun of me. The therapist helps me with meds, and is in general more caring about it. So what if universities see it? They don't judge. I didn't even know that they knew about therapy. I say therapy is the better option.

[Love.Hate]

I would go for therapy, if you don't like it you haven't lost anything by trying. I didn't like it cause I don't want to openly talk about my problems, but if that's what you want to do then therapy is best for you. Your parents want to help, but really we both know they can't to the extent a therapist could. University's do not judge people for accepting help.
Its good to have someone to talk to and confide in, keeping things bottled up is never a good idea, do what you want. Not what your parents want.

[georgiamay]

If you can't tell your parents everything, then they can't help you to the extent that a therapist could. Not everyone that self harms needs therapy, you don't even need to be depressed to need therapy. I'm not saying that you don't have problems, but maybe talk to a doctor first and see if they think therapy would help, because sometimes it's not needed.

In my opinion, therapy is better. No kids can talk to their parents openly. It's got nothing to do with the parents, they could be the best parents in the world, it's just a well known fact that kids don't want to talk to their parents about a lot of stuff. Plus, parents don't have any training in mental health and that sort of stuff, so they won't really know much about it other than what the read on the internet.

Are you sure that universities and employers see that you've had therapy? That would be in your medical files, which are strictly confidential. I can see uni's wanting to see medical records though cause you'll be living there, but employers shouldn't need to see it. Even if I'm wrong and they do see it, they're not allowed to discriminate against you because of it.

[Fiction]

Personally I found that neither my parents nor councelling has helped, but that doesn't ,mean you shouldn't try it. I found a coucnellor much easier to talk to than my parents so if he'd been a decent councellor, this would have helped.

[anonymous53]

There are things therapists can help with that parents can't. Mostly because you know they won't get mad, or yell at you.


As for the university thing, I don't believe they see it. You'd have to give them permission to look in medical files, which they aren't supposed to ask you. If they do just explain you were going through a rough time and needed someone to talk to. They will understand that way.

[Nelson]

To be honest, Neither.
I prefer to talk to my best friends, they understand more about what goes on in my head.

I have a 'therapist', but I can't talk to him about cutting, he can't do anything about it, my best friends on the other hand, they can take things, or just leave me as a friend.
I can't talk to my dad, he doesn't accept my sexuality, he doesn't understand my mental conditions, anything.

Thats my point of view

[Cynical]

I would get a therapist, my therapist was much more easy to talk to. Only problem was that mine had no experience in SH but at least he she tried. As for the university situation, they shouldn't be looking at your medical record.

[tombstone]

I think the answer to this depends on you, your parents, and the relationship you have with your parents.

[Charleigh]

Your parents are emotionally envolved with you because you are their child and they dont want to see you hurt, so depending on what you tell them or talk about or plan to share their reactions can vary to different severities.

I think if you dont have your therapist anymore, maybe talk to a school counsellour?

[SilentlyCrying]

I'd personally go with the therapist. I wish I still had one, she was horrible, but just the thought of her being there was enough.

[FullyAlive]

I can't talk to my mother at all. And if I can't talk to her I've got no chance with my dad. I find it a hell of a lot easier to talk to adults completely uninvolved with my life. I'm being sent to counselling and I hope it'll be a lot easier to talk to them rather than family. And I should hope it'll be beneficial.
If I were you and had the opportunity to talk to a therapist I'd take it they're much more likely to be able to help than your parents who's vision will always be clouded and biased anyway.

[alluneedtoknow]

my opinion is that some therapists are better bc there are just some things you would never tell you parents. but some only wanna push meds down your throat thinking that it helps when it really just supresses your feelings making you bottle them . i had that happen. i have anger issues and the therapist only gave me meds and asked how they made me feel. when i said i was still angry he would up them. never got to the real reason i was angry....which was because i felt left out by my parents and all they did was make fun of me and compare me to my siblings. so if you search for the reason to your problems....it helps a lot more than meds. im also add and it wasnt diagnosed until recently....because i wasnt a problem in school. i am actually very smart and i write draw play music and can do multiple things at once. down side.....i get bored really easily.....

[MyConfusion]

Therapists as I don't talk to my parents if I can help it :/

[NobodysCupOf Tea]

Thank you so much everyone. I've taken some of your advice and got in touch with a counsellor, it starts Wednesday. Any advice? X

[Spook]

Personally, telling a stranger about my personal problems and thoughts doesn't make me feel comfortable. I have known my parents all my life, and feel more comfortable talking to them.