Self-medicating depression

[Unconventional]

Hello.

At the moment I'm straight-edge, by the way.

I'm battling mental health problems; mainly depression. I have been doing so for many years now. I'm 17 and I feel like with every particularly bad episode I am literally on the brink of irreversibly ruining my life. Or ending it. One of the two.

I'm not on medication for depression (yet?). I am still in the process of being diagnosed.

I was wondering if any of you who are not straight-edge, have ever tried to self-medicate depression (or other mental health problems such as anxiety or whatever) with alcohol or weed or any other kind of drug. If you have/do, I would very much like it if you could share your experiences with me.

Thanks.

[Quick_Sylver]

My brother is currently in jail for several drug charges for self medicating with cocaine for ADHD, and other mental issues. Self medicating isn't worth it hun. :hug: Send me a message if you need to talk.

[staying_alive]

Maliza, I sympathize with your brother. I too have ADHD, but chose to self-medicate with others' medication instead of the hard drugs. I don't necessarily agree that it's a bad idea to self-medicate, just because of the success I achieved when I did.

Unconventional, good luck in your diagnosis. I'm sure once on medication you will begin to look up again and your life will begin to turn around. As for the self-medicating, I think, in your situation, it would be best to avoid it. Depression medication is very long term stuff; it builds up in your system to help you all the time. Weed, alcohol, and other drugs might make you feel better while they run their course, but as you come back to reality your depression will worsen. Absolutely, POSITIVELY, stay away from any stimulants - meth, cocaine, etc. They will quite likely "cure" your depression while in your system and make you feel good, but their highs are directly proportional to the crash - i.e. the more awesome you feel at their peak, the more terrible you feel when you come down. This is what causes such strong addictions.

Good luck.

[Unconventional]

Thank you. And thank you both for your replies.

It is going to be months until I am finished with my diagnosis, though. I have only had one meeting so far. I then went abroad for awhile so my next one isn't for another couple of weeks. And there is likely to be a third one about a month after that, too.

I've been like this for years though and I'm so fucking tired of it. My parents would absolutely disown me if I broke my straight-edge vow and I've never even considered it anyway until recently. And only as a short-term thing. I don't know what to do.

[Quick_Sylver]

Thank you. And thank you both for your replies.

It is going to be months until I am finished with my diagnosis, though. I have only had one meeting so far. I then went abroad for awhile so my next one isn't for another couple of weeks. And there is likely to be a third one about a month after that, too.

I've been like this for years though and I'm so fucking tired of it. My parents would absolutely disown me if I broke my straight-edge vow and I've never even considered it anyway until recently. And only as a short-term thing. I don't know what to do.

:hug: I know its hard. Just take a deep breath and breath. You can do this. You will be okay.

[Zazu]

If I'm 100% honest, I would recommend something such as THC over ANY synthetic anti-depressant.

I was on prozac (amongst various other prescribed drugs) for a few years for depression / bi-polar and I really found them to have very unpleasant and unwanted side effects such as emotional numbness, difficulty in forming arguments, difficulty in thinking freely e.t.c. e.t.c. I lost my sex drive to a degree and found it hard to gain any form of pleasure / enjoyment from most things. I also put on quite a bit of weight (2 stone) over the course of using it. It was worth being on it to stop the downward pangs, but, as mentioned, I have found a small amount of THC once a week to do MUCH more good than a medium dose of prozac once a day.

Obviously, the main issue with taking ANY drug for ANYTHING is that you won't know how it will affect you until you start taking it. The other main issues you would face with self-medicating with something such as THC are 1) guaranteeing purity and quality of the drug, 2) finding a safe method of ingestion which doesn't cause you any harm, 3) being able to measure exactly how much of the drug you are taking and 4) social / 'legal' stigmas surrounding 'illegal' drugs.

I'm guessing that you wouldn't choose to start self-medicating on something like THC as you are straight-edge, though.

I still stick to my guns and say that from both a medical and personal perspective, self-medicating with THC for depression is a lot more natural, pleasant and safe than dosing up with synthesised anti-depressants.

Whichever path you do choose, remember you'll have people here to support you if you need and make sure that you fully educate yourself about ALL routes of treatment ('legal' or otherwise) before you make any decisions.

[Unconventional]

Thank you for your replies.

I know that I said I was straight-edge, but I am starting to consider breaking it to self-medicate...after all, it's about medicating and not extra pleasure, in my case...if that makes sense? I don't want to lose myself on a high but I can't stand my lows.

The only problem with self-medicating is that I don't think I would ever be in a situation where it would be an option for me anyway because I still live at home and my parents would probably, like, kick me out if I'd been drinking alcohol or smoking weed, or something (and I'm not even exaggerating here).

[staying_alive]

Thank you for your replies.

I know that I said I was straight-edge, but I am starting to consider breaking it to self-medicate...after all, it's about medicating and not extra pleasure, in my case...if that makes sense? I don't want to lose myself on a high but I can't stand my lows.

The only problem with self-medicating is that I don't think I would ever be in a situation where it would be an option for me anyway because I still live at home and my parents would probably, like, kick me out if I'd been drinking alcohol or smoking weed, or something (and I'm not even exaggerating here).

The problem, at least in my opinion, with self-medicating depression is that it's such a sensitive disorder. Any small thing can make or break someone with depression, so medicating the problem is very hard for doctors. Prescribed medication attempts to do its work in the background, very slowly, so the depression decreases over time. The high from self-medicating could indeed solve your low mood, but it'll send you right back down (possibly even further) when the high ends.

I don't want to stop you from self-medicating if you must wait for a prescription. Just please be careful with what you try and remember that they'll impact your mood. I've seen negative results from weed before where people make VERY rash decisions; please remember if you're on the verge of such a decision that the drugs WILL wear off and things can always improve.

Good luck.

[bleedoutlove]

NEVER self-medicate using alcohol for depression. Alcohol is a depressant, meaning it enhances the mood you're in -- and if you're depressed, it'll be fucking torture.
Cannabis is an effective cure for depression. (not promoting)

[Unconventional]

Ok. Thanks for the feedback, guys.

Is it really obvious when someone is stoned? I don't think I've ever been around anybody smoking weed before except one girl at school who constantly stinks of a mixture of marijuana and cigarettes...lol.

[Smirch]

Thank you for your replies. It is going to be months until I am finished with my diagnosis, though. I have only had one meeting so far. I then went abroad for awhile so my next one isn't for another couple of weeks. And there is likely to be a third one about a month after that, too.

[Nelson]

Please, Don't self-medicate, it can be the worst thing you could do, If you told a mental health specialist you had been self medicating, they will say that is the worst thing you can do.
As bad as it sounds, See a specialist, If you self medicate, you could be medicating for the wrong disorder.
But I will say, Drinking may seem like it takes away the feelings, but infact it makes them far worse..

[CantLiveWithoutYou]

You know, it really pisses me off when people say "oh my friend did something illegal and got in trouble for it!!!" that's what the first reply is like. It's HIS fault for doing something illegal, there are thousands of legal alternative treatments for ADD. I'm very sorry that that happened to him but you can't blame anyone or anything else for it. Everyone saying DON'T self medicate needs to get informed. I can name 40 medications you can buy online like... on amazon or something to treat depression. And probably 5 for ADHD/DD. And they're not illegal, they're not monitored by the FDA or anything, and rarely have any of them had a single bad effect. Hell, for my depression I take St. John's Wort and it is amazing. I don't recommend you take anything without asking a doctor, but saying you need to avoid anything that your doctor didn't specifically prescribe is just ignorant.

[staying_alive]

You know, it really pisses me off when people say "oh my friend did something illegal and got in trouble for it!!!" that's what the first reply is like. It's HIS fault for doing something illegal, there are thousands of legal alternative treatments for ADD. I'm very sorry that that happened to him but you can't blame anyone or anything else for it. Everyone saying DON'T self medicate needs to get informed. I can name 40 medications you can buy online like... on amazon or something to treat depression. And probably 5 for ADHD/DD. And they're not illegal, they're not monitored by the FDA or anything, and rarely have any of them had a single bad effect. Hell, for my depression I take St. John's Wort and it is amazing. I don't recommend you take anything without asking a doctor, but saying you need to avoid anything that your doctor didn't specifically prescribe is just ignorant.

That really pisses me off too. However, the post you're talking about is NOTHING like the people that rant all over these boards about the illegality of drugs and talk about their "friends" dying or getting arrested to validate their opinion. That poster said that it isn't worth self-medicating, and then talked about his/her brother who made a very bad mistake. He/She didn't say anything about it not being the brother's fault, or that he didn't deserve his punishment for using a very dangerous substance.

Advising someone to avoid self-medication is NOT ignorance. In fact, what you're doing could be characterized as more ignorant. Sure, you threw in that always asking your doctor is important, but something as serious and volatile as depression is always something to talk to a doctor about - especially since prescribed meds can help so drastically.

[Syvelocin]

The only reason I'm opposed to this is that this stuff just made the issue worse for me, I had my mental disorders and I was also a drug addict, so in addition to the bipolar/anorexia hospitalization, I had to do the rehab as well. I have no prejudice against drugs and self-medication, though I have a few moral issues with alcohol since my aunt was an alcoholic. I just wouldn't do it. If you're really having issues, ask for some extra help, but I'd definitely wait until you can get on a prescription antidepressant. It's much safer, and you have an expert there to guide you with whether you should increase/decrease dosage, with bad side-affects, or if you should have your entire treatment plan changed.

[Unconventional]

Thank you for all of your replies.

I do understand the concerns raised...seriously, I do. And like I said, at the moment I am straight-edge. I've never drank alcohol or done recreational drugs before in my life and never even wanted to. But I'm just so desperate now...and I am not going to get proper treatment for another few months, probably; the assessment procedure is going really really slow because of the demand on the service.

[staying_alive]

Thank you for all of your replies.

I do understand the concerns raised...seriously, I do. And like I said, at the moment I am straight-edge. I've never drank alcohol or done recreational drugs before in my life and never even wanted to. But I'm just so desperate now...and I am not going to get proper treatment for another few months, probably; the assessment procedure is going really really slow because of the demand on the service.

You say that you're desperate, and desperation+depression is never a good combination. I understand how you would logically think that self-medicating will fix this combination. However, drug addiction + depression is even worse, and the former usually ends in the latter, or vice versa. Seriously consider the possibility that you could temporarily solve your problems but will quite likely form an addiction in the process, which would send you spiraling down even further. Weed/alcohol = depressants, and stimulants make real life feel like a depressant. It's a lose-lose situation, even moreso when you're depressed in the first place.

There are obvious remedies that don't require a prescription, as was said in some above posts. You seem to be in a situation where the prescription is out of reach for while, so I suggest you head to your local pharmacy or start googling because there are sure to be better, more proven ways to help depression than alcohol/weed/etc.

[judthryn]

hi unconditional(sorry don't know your name)...
never take self medication, consult your general physician first and take medication as prescribed, in addition to that take a healthy diet and do some meditation and yoga.. this will help you to get relaxed.

[JunkBondTrader]

Okay, I know I;m late on this, but what's happened to me over the past two weeks or so is a very good reason not to self medicate with alcohol. As far as cannabis is concerned, it is also not a treatment for depression and I'd like to point out that in all of the places where it is legal in medicinal form, it is never used for that purpose and in many cases can make depression worse... but anyway...

I'm a heavy drinker and have been for the past year or so. I've also been depressed for the past five and had sleep issues for four. It was because of the sleep issues that I began drinking, not the depression itself. It worked too, every time I guzzled a few beers I'd be out cold. Better than valium. Seriously.

So this was all well and good for a while until the depression started getting worse, and I mean a lot worse. Despite what people are saying alcohol doesn't make depression worse because it's a depressant, it does this because of it's effects on serotonin and dopamine levels in the brain. When people say depressant, they mean it's a CNS depressant, which, in laymans terms, just means sedative-hypnotic. When a depressed person drinks, they do feel better and I am proof of that.

The problem is, at the end of the day, it does make depression worse and at the same time you come to rely on it just to get you through the day and off to sleep at night. To cut a long story short, I was admitted to a hospital about two weeks ago and got referred to psych (what happened is a story for another time). The result was, I've been seeing a team at my local mental health trust every few days since then and the people there agree that my problem is clinical depression and that I rely on alcohol for it. So, it should be simple, right? Just treat the depression and I can stop drinking and everything's fine and dandy.

Oh no. Here's the kicker: They can't treat the depression until I stop drinking, but if I stop drinking then my entire life basically falls down the crapper. Now, I'm not an alcoholic, at least not in the physical sense (I've made it a few days with no physical withdrawal symptoms before), but I need booze to fall asleep and basically to enjoy anything at all.

So there's why self medication is a bad idea. It's a vicious cycle and in the end, all it does it make it impossible to get any real effective form of treatment.

Sorry for the essay, but I hope I've made my point. Good luck with everything, but please wait it out to see an actual doctor, don't do what I did and self-medicate until you're literally unable to manage it yourself anymore. If things get really tough, head to your local A&E and they'll help you out.

[Cap'nCrunch]

What started out as simple experimentation with drugs out of interest in their being taboo (and out of ennui) slowly became a steadfast addiction. I never gave a single thought to the fact that I might have a mental disorder and I was self-medicating. Of course, I didn't label it as 'self-medicating,' but looking back, that's sort of what I see.

I had a lot of trouble in school up to my second year in college. Before then, I got in trouble with the law, didn't care about school and was suicidal. I started taking Adderal by prescription my second year at college, and when I finally started taking the medication as directed (every day), I felt like I found meaning in my life. It's literally like my life turned around 180 degrees. I'm doing well in school and I feel like I have something to live for--a purpose in life that I didn't feel in high school.

So, I guess all I have to say is be careful with how you cope. Self-medicating can be dangerous and in most cases is very illegal.

[Unconventional]

Thank you for all of your feedback. I really appreciate you all taking the time to talk to me about it. Things have been really bad for this week in particular...so glad that it's the weekend now. I have my second assessment meeting with my psychiatrist and psychologist next Friday.

[EarthToBryan]

Self medication is waaaay different than the controlled, tried and true (usually) prescription medication given by doctors. It is illegal, so you wont want to talk about it to your doctor, especially if something goes wrong. Also, unless ingested cannabis hurts your lungs around as much as tobacco smoking.

[Cap'nCrunch]

Thank you for all of your feedback. I really appreciate you all taking the time to talk to me about it. Things have been really bad for this week in particular...so glad that it's the weekend now. I have my second assessment meeting with my psychiatrist and psychologist next Friday.

You might feel like nobody could possibly imagine how terrible and hopeless you feel, but I'd bet my life that I can. Keep working with your health professionals and for the love of God, don't start (if you haven't already) using drugs to relieve your problems. It will only create more problems. I promise. I've been seeing a psychiatrist since I was 15 and I've had to try a good number of different medications to find something to help me. And even while I've been doing that, I've lost hope more times than I can remember. Just keep trying.