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Old March 18th, 2011, 06:35 PM   #1
ocean_blue
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Join Date: June 1, 2009
Location: somewhere under the rainbow
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Default :/

Okay Erm this is weird I haven't posted here in so long so sorry if I do something I'm not supposed to...
Basically in the last year or whatever stuff has got worse. I can't eat at school at all without feeling physically sick but if I do get to a point where I need to eat I end up bingeing. I guess I'm skinnier but I don't really know tbh. I certainly don't feel it.
But I was hiding it all pretty well. The school etc knew but it had all sort of faded away but I'm going on a school away trip at easter and now suddenly they're all checking on me again, and say if I don't eat more they won't let me go
Now I have to talk to some councillor woman on monday and I'm obsessing I can't help it I'm just really scared
Sorry for the rant I just needed to write it I think. But does anyone know what to expect? I'm worried she'll call my mum in or something. Shit. Anyway thanks for reading :/ any help apprieciated.

~Look beyond
The mascara-stained tears
And the bleeding
I'm still the little girl
Who likes jumping in puddles
And blowing bubbles
I'm still the little girl
Who's scared of the dark.~
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Old March 18th, 2011, 08:39 PM   #2
1_21Guns
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Name: Natalie
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Default Re: :/

You're scared, take the help they offer you. I know your mum being brought in probably feels like the the worst thing that could possibly happen, but it might not be, nothing says it's all going to horribly wrong forever. The physical sickness is basically as pyschological response to eating, try eating small portions of things you like, or things you can convince yourself don't contain many calories etc and slowly build yourself up to managing proper meals.
Your mind will play such terrible tricks on you, you're beautiful just as you are, and starving certainly isn't going to remove that feeling you're not thin enough.

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Old March 19th, 2011, 05:30 PM   #3
ocean_blue
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Thanks for replying yeah I know I just dont feel ready yet.
Hopefully Monday will be ok... They can't actually stop me from going away though can they?? Anyway thank you that's so nice

~Look beyond
The mascara-stained tears
And the bleeding
I'm still the little girl
Who likes jumping in puddles
And blowing bubbles
I'm still the little girl
Who's scared of the dark.~
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Old March 19th, 2011, 06:57 PM   #4
1_21Guns
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Name: Natalie
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They might call it medical grounds, in which case they can.. kinda. I'm sure as long as you're showing that you're trying I'm sure they won't

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Old March 23rd, 2011, 12:00 PM   #5
Spook
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Name: Caitlin
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Default Re: :/

It really annoys me when school peeps get all up in your business. It isn't their choice. The school always acts like it runs your life. I mean, its like saying. "If you don't stop your bulemia i'm not gonna let you go on a field trip." Its completely unfair. I'm not sure what to think...do they really care or is it just to brush up on their image? It is a good thing to slowly come out of anorexia or bulemia, but not to be forced. Try eating little bits each day, then slowly eat more and more until you're on a regular diet. good luck, Caitlin

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