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Old December 9th, 2006, 01:46 PM   #1
-Silence
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Default Will we be like them?

Do you think it's true that we'll be just like our abuser?

I mean really, what are the odds that you can have a normal family without doing the same to your child that was done to you?

I don't want to be like her, I want a family, I want to love someone and be happy and I want to be a good parent. But I'm scared. What if I turn out just like my mother without even knowing it? What if I lose my temper and I turn into her? What if I push away anyone and everyone that loves me, and do exactly to that child what was done to me?

Is it possible to know before you have a family or do I continue to push away everyone because of that fear?

Will we be like them?


(Sorry, just what was going through my head)



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Old December 9th, 2006, 02:20 PM   #2
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

See? This is what happens when someone gets abused... they become unsure about themselves and they are scared to be the same person that abused them...
What I think : No, I don't think you'll be like her

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Old December 9th, 2006, 07:01 PM   #3
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Well, since you don't like your abuse, and you wanna love somebody, you prob won't turn out like that.

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Old December 9th, 2006, 07:08 PM   #4
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

I agree you are you're own guide not the abuser.

Josh

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Old December 10th, 2006, 08:26 AM   #5
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

No, it seems very unlikely that you will turn out like her. You long for a steady, safe, loving relationship and I reckon you will become part of a loving relationship.


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Old December 11th, 2006, 12:09 AM   #6
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

You idiots. You WILL 100% be like her, unless you get counseling. Listen to love line. Jeez. The doctor says anybody who is abused will tend to be like their abuser or have a gf/bf just like their abuser unless they get counseling. So f'ing get counseling if you don't want to be like your mom. I hate you mom by the way. Sorry but I just do. I hate anybody who abuse anybody. Period! I'm sorry, I think everybody are idiots except Danielle. So get counseling or you WILL be abused even more by your bf/gf or be the abuser. This is the truth, at least Doctor Drew says so and every other Doctor. I'm pissed off at you people for saying you're saying. Silence needs counseling and/or a psychologist!
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Old December 11th, 2006, 08:07 AM   #7
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Dude, you don't even know what you're talking about... also, doctors aren't 100% accurate always... actually, they never are... and we don't care what that Doctor Drew says, so stfu

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Old December 11th, 2006, 12:42 PM   #8
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Quote:
Originally Posted by megamikey59 View Post
You idiots. You WILL 100% be like her, unless you get counseling...anybody who is abused will tend to be like their abuser or have a gf/bf just like their abuser unless they get counseling. So f'ing get counseling if you don't want to be like your mom. I'm sorry, I think everybody are idiots except Danielle. So get counseling or you WILL be abused even more by your bf/gf or be the abuser. This is the truth, at least Doctor Drew says so and every other Doctor. I'm pissed off at you people for saying you're saying. Silence needs counseling and/or a psychologist!
What solid evidence is there to say that EVERYONE who is abused will enter into more damaging relationships in later life? One of my friends (55) was sexually abused as a child. But he is not an abuser. He was not abused further. He also did not go to a psychologist or counselling. He IS however, the kindest and most gentle person I know. Go figure.

And using Doctor Drew as your reference is not impressive, nor is it concrete evidence.

Silence, if you want to change. If you want to break free of the abusive relationship pattern then you will succeed and avoid in turing into your abuser.


~ The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step ~

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Old December 11th, 2006, 07:55 PM   #9
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

According to the book...

Most people abused do not usually become the abusers however most of the abusers were the abused.

That is not a confucius quote either.

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Old December 11th, 2006, 09:58 PM   #10
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Fine, I'm stupid. I'm just saying what everybody else fucking says. If you fucking want proof come over to my house. I'll take you to every doctor, psychologist, and fucking counselor. They'll all fucking say yes. Every doctor, counselor, psychologist, teacher, adult I've asked all said yes, unless you get some type of counseling.
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Old December 11th, 2006, 10:00 PM   #11
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Let's calm down, and avoid calling people stupid.

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Old December 12th, 2006, 07:12 AM   #12
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

No one said the word STUPID 'till he did

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Old December 12th, 2006, 03:28 PM   #13
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

im worried i will be like my dad too, when people annoy me and i get angry i lash out and mess things up, what if i take it too far and hurt someone, and carry on because im so mad,i dont want to hurt anyone, i try not to i turn it to myself and hurt myself, i dont want to make anyone hurt like he makes me hurt, but i so scared i will

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Old December 12th, 2006, 03:33 PM   #14
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Harrie, I know your too soft (not a bad thing) to do anything like that.. don't worry.

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Old December 12th, 2006, 09:05 PM   #15
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

I call everybody idiots. They just are. Smartest person in history only used 15% of his brain? How idiotic is that? We're all idiots. So if you ban me for saying the truth, you're messed up. It's the stupid truth. And BlazingStar* go to counseling. If you're really that sad about hurting others then take counseling. I don't give a crap about anybody and if somebody get me mad I'll lash out at them or myself, and won't care. It IS their fault for getting me mad.
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Old December 12th, 2006, 09:23 PM   #16
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Pul-lease! Don't ruin this thread. I would hate to lock it, but if you keep having these outbursts of meaness. I will have to lock this and give you and infraction.

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Old December 13th, 2006, 07:10 AM   #17
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Quote:
Originally Posted by megamikey59 View Post
I call everybody idiots. They just are. Smartest person in history only used 15% of his brain? How idiotic is that? We're all idiots. So if you ban me for saying the truth, you're messed up. It's the stupid truth. And BlazingStar* go to counseling. If you're really that sad about hurting others then take counseling. I don't give a crap about anybody and if somebody get me mad I'll lash out at them or myself, and won't care. It IS their fault for getting me mad.
Ok...

What if the post intelligent person used 15% of their brain?? Do you ever imagine all we could store if we used 100% of our brain?? sSo useless stuff... I don't even wanna imagine.. my brain would explode.

No one's gonna bann you for telling what you think... they are gonna bann you cause you are flamming everyone telling them that they are gonna be abusers if they don't do a certain thing, without even knowing them a little bit...

Carol (BlazingStar*) should not go to counceling.. yo don't know her a bit (neither reallu do I) so don't go everywhere telling everyone what they should do and what they shouldn't... let people be!

And we got you mad for not agreeing with you?? wtf is that?? I dn't agree with you at all, you are saying stuff that make no sence, telling that doctors are always 100% right when they never are, that these people are gonna be abusers... this is ridiculous!! WE should be the ones mad, we are not calling anyone abusers.

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Old December 13th, 2006, 08:39 AM   #18
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

I'm not mad. And I never gotten mad from this site. Why do people think I get mad easily? I DON'T get mad that easily. I'm one of those people who takes anger out on somebody or themself when they get too filled up with anger. I wouldn't take my anger out on this site. Fine, be mad. I don't care what you think. And yes, they should go to counseling or psychology, but if they don't want to, they don't have to. Fine, I'm wrong. Doctors aren't 100% correct but they're mostly always correct. They do research and studies and tests before they tell the public. My everything my doctor, said, about this, had came true. He told me that I will most likely hold my anger in until I can't help it anymore. He told my mom if she didn't go to counseling she'll keep dating bad guys and abusing kids.

Last edited by megamikey59; December 13th, 2006 at 08:55 AM.
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Old December 13th, 2006, 09:09 AM   #19
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Quote:
Originally Posted by megamikey59 View Post
I call everybody idiots. They just are. Smartest person in history only used 15% of his brain? How idiotic is that? We're all idiots. So if you ban me for saying the truth, you're messed up. It's the stupid truth. And BlazingStar* go to counseling. If you're really that sad about hurting others then take counseling. I don't give a crap about anybody and if somebody get me mad I'll lash out at them or myself, and won't care. It IS their fault for getting me mad.
Quote:
Originally Posted by megamikey59 View Post
I'm not mad. And I never gotten mad from this site. Why do people think I get mad easily? I DON'T get mad that easily. I'm one of those people who takes anger out on somebody or themself when they get too filled up with anger. I wouldn't take my anger out on this site. Fine, be mad. I don't care what you think. And yes, they should go to counseling or psychology, but if they don't want to, they don't have to. Fine, I'm wrong. Doctors aren't 100% correct but they're mostly always correct. They do research and studies and tests before they tell the public. My everything my doctor, said, about this, had came true. He told me that I will most likely hold my anger in until I can't help it anymore. He told my mom if she didn't go to counseling she'll keep dating bad guys and abusing kids.
How about you re-reading your post

And doctors are not always 100% sure... why do you think there people who actually die on operations and everything else?? I don't think Dr. Drew has talked to you about those anyway...
Also being an abuser all your life is something... I don't think that if someone gets abused at something like a rasonble age such as 20 or more being an enough of mature person, I don't think you will become an abuser... instead, you will be soooo against it now tha you know how it feels. Being a child is something else... you don't really know what really happened, and if that was really wrong or not... the child can decide to become an abuser, or not... it deppends on how they feel about what happened; people near them also influence their choises... obviously, if they are taken away from the abuser, they are gonna think that there's got to be something wrong... what could it be?? not every child is stupid and only thinks about being 6.

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.
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Old December 13th, 2006, 09:37 AM   #20
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Default Re: Will we be like them?

Everybody is stupid. It's a fact. I'm sorry if anybody's offended but we only DO use 15% of our brains maxium.
Quote:
It IS their fault for getting me mad.
I'm just saying it IS their fault. I wasn't mad posting that. And I never said anything about Doctor Drew in my last post. I was talking to my doctor. The doctor I get my prescriptions and all that from. That's the doctor I'm talking about, not Doctor Drew. By the way, Doctor Drew's the guy in my love line listener signature. If you don't think I'll be an abuser than you HAVE no idea who or what I'm capable of. I am an abuser. I hate it but I try to take my anger out on myself so I won't abuse anybody. I just wish people would see my true self when I'm mad and send me to jail just for that, so I can't harm anybody but actually bad people. I hate it when people think others aren't abusers just from looking at them. Everybody at my school think I'm a good boy. The teacher's pet. I don't get in trouble at school so they think I'm all organized and all good at home. *sighs*
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