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Old May 15th, 2010, 02:25 PM   #1
Antonioc
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Default I really want to date her, but...

We're great friends and hang out quite a bit. I just think I really want to go out with her? I'm afraid that if I ask her out, it'll go wrong just like everything else I've ever tried (meaning she'll say no, will be too confused to talk to me and have our friendship effectively destroyed). She's one of the few people I can actually trust, and although she's not my best friend, she's pretty damn close.

Advice please?
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Old May 15th, 2010, 03:08 PM   #2
steve1234
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Im in a similar situation.
I'm not sure I want to go out with her as I don't think I'm ready for a relationship. But, I really want to tell her I like her. She is not my best friend, but she is one of my closest female friends, and I am scared that if I tell her it will ruin the friendship.
I posted my situation on this forum a few weeks back, where I go a lot of advice (Its called 'Don't Want To Ruin Friendship' if you want to look for it).
I am going to tell her soon, its just getting her alone, as there always seem to be other people around when we talk.

Anyway, I think you should tell her. If you don't, you might end up regretting not telling her. Also, you will never know for sure if she likes you back if you don't ask her.

Good luck!


"Sing me to sleep
And then leave me alone
Don't try to wake me in the morning
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Old May 16th, 2010, 01:03 PM   #3
Jordan...14
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I was in this situation like a week ago and then she went out with someone else. trust me it sucks like a bitch when that happens. so I'd tell her and If she's truly a good friend she'll understand.

We Were The Kings And Queens of Promise

ERADICATION. RE-POPULATION. RE-INFECTION.
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Old May 16th, 2010, 01:06 PM   #4
The Dark Lord
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I was in your situation but I just asked her and she said YES!!! If you are really close then surely your friendship will survive?

“Religion is an insult to human dignity. With or without it, you'd have good people doing good things and evil people doing bad things, but for good people to do bad things, it takes religion.”-Steven Weinberg

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Old May 16th, 2010, 02:47 PM   #5
Trackstar29
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I think you should just ask her, you never know what could happen
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Old May 31st, 2010, 02:57 AM   #6
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Ive learned that sometimes "labeling" a relationship can actually cause tension and make things worse. With one of my ex's she would constantly ask me what we are and why dont i ask her out etc. And eventully it go things to a bad point so we ended things. But if you really like her go ahead for it.

"Everything Happens For A Reason, It Might Be Unknown, but in the future we will benefit from it "

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Old June 1st, 2010, 12:40 PM   #7
xRAPiiDG4MERx
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

im in the same situation, with my best friend. i know one of her friends, that im friends with and asked her to put a word in for me hope it works. good luck guys and girls
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Old June 1st, 2010, 02:19 PM   #8
morris13624
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

If it was me I would go for it I mean yeah if she says no then it will probably ruin your friendship or maybe not it depends on how close you guys are. But I look at it like well I am guessing you are in high school and I am graduating from my high school in a week or so and the biggest thing I regretted was I became friends with too many girls and never tried to take a chance. So just saying man if I was you I'd go for it because once you are out of high school you're probably not going to see her except for maybe a summer or two if you come back from college or something like that, and even if you aren't graduating this year or not even next year still because if you want to date her and she says no it is going to take time to get over it and after that time you can go out and look for some body else.
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Old June 1st, 2010, 04:19 PM   #9
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I was in this kind of situation. Needless to say, it didn't work out. I asked her out, thinking that was what she wanted, and it has RUNINED our friendship. Now she won't even talk to me.

TBH, I wouldn't risk asking her out, because it could ruin your friendship and it's not worth it.

~John~
"Better to beg than to steal, but better to work than to beg"-Grandma Topper
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Old June 1st, 2010, 05:16 PM   #10
Jordan...14
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackBetty View Post
I was in this kind of situation. Needless to say, it didn't work out. I asked her out, thinking that was what she wanted, and it has RUNINED our friendship. Now she won't even talk to me.

TBH, I wouldn't risk asking her out, because it could ruin your friendship and it's not worth it.
Who's to say this will happen to him?

We Were The Kings And Queens of Promise

ERADICATION. RE-POPULATION. RE-INFECTION.
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Old June 1st, 2010, 07:05 PM   #11
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordan...14 View Post
Who's to say this will happen to him?
I didn't say this was going to happen to him. I was simply giving my input of how it went for me.

~John~
"Better to beg than to steal, but better to work than to beg"-Grandma Topper
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Old June 2nd, 2010, 07:43 PM   #12
Antonioc
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Well, I didn't ask her out.
And now our friendship like, fell apart.

It was too much when she found out that I had cut myself over her (thought I wouldn't go out with her, thought she didn't like me, etc...)

We're still friends, but we barely talk.

I really shouldve asked her out a month ago. I'd be so much happer.
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Old June 2nd, 2010, 08:01 PM   #13
coolkid1
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I'm really sorry. Talk to her and say that you didn't mean to ruin this relationship. She should understand.

Last edited by coolkid1; June 2nd, 2010 at 08:08 PM.
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Old June 3rd, 2010, 06:44 AM   #14
adamwest
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

I think you should try and go out with her because if you don't you will always wonder what could have been.
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Old June 3rd, 2010, 09:20 AM   #15
Continuum
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Default Re: I really want to date her, but...

Get a chance to talk to her, if she really is a good friend, she'll understand you. I'm sorry on what just happened Everything cools down, give her time, and at the right moment try to explain. If everything is settled, start from scratch (i.e. ask her out; well, you didn't receive her no yet right? Hopefully, she will accept. )

Good luck mate

Last edited by Continuum; June 3rd, 2010 at 09:20 AM. Reason: spacing
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