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Old November 5th, 2008, 10:14 AM   #1
deaddj4th
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Default Please help me! murderous thoughts

hi, i REALLY need someones help i posted on the thread for the other person with a similar problem to me but i need all the help i can get so im gunna post my own thread too. I have just started university in the U.K and half way through the summer before i left i was on a family holiday in france. In the cottage i was staying in i came across this draw which contained some extreemly sharp knives. In any other time of my life i would've looked upon this as a vital part of the kitchen but instead of that i felt a VERY strong urge to pick one up and (this hurts to admit) plunge it into someone and kill them. I'm a christian by upbringing and i've never lost my faith so this was definitely not a normal feeling for me and for the rest of that evening i lied awake trying to get to sleep but being unable to due to the horrific thoughts i had earlier on. anyway since then ive been battling with these 'irrational' thoughts for what seems like all day every day. on a typical day at the moment ill get up ready for lectures and see one of my housemates and instantly get a thought/vision in my head of me brutally murdering them, then ill get through the days lectures (just, not without thinking about these thoughts non stop) and then walk on home. and it doesnt stop. im constantly fighting my own thoughts of murdering anyone that is close to me at the time. and the most soul destroying thing for me is that when i think of my parents and all they've done for me in my life i am no longer getting the same feelings towards them instead im thinking of murdering them too!! its destroying my life i've felt suicidal and very depressed. everyday i go through the same emotional rollercoaster beleiving im insane and that im goin to turn into one of these psychotic murderers you only hear about on the news. the scary thing is that the thoughts are real enough for me to question wether i should actually do what my head is telling me to do although i know by my upbringing i shouldnt. its as if i dont know whats right and wrong anymore and i hate it. if theres someone who can help i need to find them because ium scared of what my future has in store for me.
thanks.
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Old February 5th, 2009, 09:27 PM   #2
Stark
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

Well I had thoughts like this too, I found my problem was, I kept bottling up my anger and sadness, and then I started having murderous thoughts because of it. Here are some tips to get over it, go into a quiet place and just yell, squeeze a stress ball, or get something like a pillow, and bash the shit out of it -pardon my french-

I hope this helps.
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Old February 8th, 2009, 02:57 AM   #3
NightHawksr71
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

Yeah, I get these thoughts as well. its usually like a image of me severely hurting them or killing them. Its kind of a little odd, but it doesn't seem to bother me neither?

And I always seem to want to hurt someone. I don't know why, just hurt them. Its like an urge. but deeper.

And yeah don't think I will say anymore about that.

If you find a way of getting rid of it. Enlighten me.
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Old February 8th, 2009, 03:06 AM   #4
Mzor203
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

This sounds like it could possibly be some sort of control/anger management problem. It would probably be wise to see someone about this, probably a counselor or psychiatrist.

This could potentially be very dangerous to those around you. It seems that you love them very much, but there's something going on here which is affecting you. The sooner you get it sorted the better. So see if you can get an appointment with a psychiatrist. They'll help you.
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Old February 8th, 2009, 05:40 AM   #5
NightHawksr71
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mzor View Post
This sounds like it could possibly be some sort of control/anger management problem. It would probably be wise to see someone about this, probably a counselor or psychiatrist.

This could potentially be very dangerous to those around you. It seems that you love them very much, but there's something going on here which is affecting you. The sooner you get it sorted the better. So see if you can get an appointment with a psychiatrist. They'll help you.
Did you mean me? deaddj4th? or both of us?
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Old February 8th, 2009, 10:13 PM   #6
INFERNO
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

I have something like this although for me, it's due to watching a large amount of videos of beheadings, killings, aftermaths of accidents, etc... for a few years or so (along with other things such as schizophrenia and ASPD+NPD).

You can try using a punching bag and using that or simply exercising. Also, have you watched a good amount of these killing/torture videos or done some of it before? When you get the urges to kill, do you imagine how it'd feel and the screaming of the people or just simply thinking to stab someone?
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Old February 8th, 2009, 10:20 PM   #7
Atonement
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Default Re: Please help me! murderous thoughts

Due to the fact that this member is not on a a couple weeks, I am going to lock this due to its age.

Should the original poster request it be opened, it will be at that time.


All you need is love.
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