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Old March 26th, 2015, 06:05 PM   #1
WanderingHeart
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Angry I have no choices now.

Well, I tried. Everything.
About 4 or 5 years of this shit and I'm just about done with it. And I decided that I am going to kill myself sometime soon.
I tried several times to get help but it really just didn't work. I tried reaching out and speaking so many times and it FAILED. I quit, I QUIT. Once I finally completely plan out my suicide, that weight will be lifted off my shoulders. I can't wait until the day I die. "Think about the people who will miss you!" Yeah? They all caused it! I don't care if they're sorry once I am gone. I am doing this for myself, not for those fuckheads. I am *exhausted* from all the pain and pressure.

When I die, who knows what'll happen. I deserve to go to hell, whoever's up there will probably send me there. But what can I do? This is the only way, I was destined to go to hell anyway. Of course I want to go to heaven but it doesn't look like I will.

I'm just done. This world would do better off without me.
I'm sorry Hanan, my best friend in the whole wide world. I love you so so much and you deserve better than me.

.
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Old March 26th, 2015, 08:46 PM   #2
Smithy3x
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Hey, I'm 14 boy, and got kinda the same feelings right now. Just let you know that you're not alone. I would be more than happy to chat with you if you want to, but suicide is not the option.
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Old March 26th, 2015, 09:41 PM   #3
lowride
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I tired to kill myself 4 times trust me ur not alone its painful but its gonna get better i understand y u don't want to live be there is a better way just find people that hav the same feel ik u c no way pit but there is gonna be a way out i promise please dont

A smile will get u far........
but a gun and a smile will get farther
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Old March 27th, 2015, 01:20 AM   #4
Periphery
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

@PartyPoison789 Look, I know how you feel, I defnitly do, but please, don't kill yourself. I've tried it several times and I can tell you it's not worth it. All it does is hirt those around you. People will actually miss you, we all will. You are part of VT, part of the people that make this place so awesome. I know life's hard, I really do, but you should never give up. It does get better, believe it or not. If you ever need someone to talk to, don't hesitate to let me know, okay? You don't deserve hell, because I know you're a great person. I really do know you are.

Look, all my sentences may have the same meaning but that's because I care. Yes, some random guy on the other side of the world cares. People already replied to this, they care aswell. We don't wanna loose you. Just, please please please stay safe. Remember, if there's anything you need to talk about, you can always message me. You were the first person to reply to me when I made my post when I felt bad, and I appreciate that. And I wanna say thank you. Thank you for being so awesome, thank you for caring. And I care too, I really do.

Stay strong, I'm sure you can!

When you're taught to love everyone, to love your enemies, then what value does that place on love?
-Marilyn Manson

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Old March 27th, 2015, 12:31 PM   #5
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I really appreciate your care and concern, but what can I do? I've tried getting help too many times but as long as I am in this home my parents will not get me the help I need. It's over.

.
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Old March 27th, 2015, 01:00 PM   #6
lowride
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

No its not just take it one day at a time i know life is hard but it'll get better

A smile will get u far........
but a gun and a smile will get farther
-Al Capone
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Old March 27th, 2015, 02:13 PM   #7
Periphery
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPoison789 View Post
I really appreciate your care and concern, but what can I do? I've tried getting help too many times but as long as I am in this home my parents will not get me the help I need. It's over.
You should never say it's over. No matter what may happen, you should never give up on life. Yes it's hard, but that doesn't mean you should give up. Always keep on going, I'm sure you can

When you're taught to love everyone, to love your enemies, then what value does that place on love?
-Marilyn Manson

Android? We can't be friends sorry!!!!!
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Old March 27th, 2015, 04:42 PM   #8
Abhorrence
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

There's always a choice when it comes to suicide or anything self-destructive. You have a choice to fight and you should fight. Even if you can't get help. 90% of getting help is put to you anyway. It is down to your mind whether to fight or not.


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Quote:
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Old March 27th, 2015, 06:23 PM   #9
SethfromMI
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

no matter how bad it gets, you always have choices when it comes to stuff like this

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Old March 27th, 2015, 07:33 PM   #10
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I don't know D'x. Being here (at home) makes me want to kill myself badly.

.
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Old March 27th, 2015, 07:37 PM   #11
SethfromMI
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

are there any friends or other family you could stay with till you have the chance to talk to a professional? take a deep breathe. no matter how bad it is, I promise you, there is another option

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Old March 28th, 2015, 08:47 AM   #12
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I'm only 14, I can't go anywhere -.-.

And the stupid counselor lady at school isn't helping, all she does is tell my parents everything which makes it worse! And even though I tried telling her not to she still did.

.
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Old March 28th, 2015, 02:29 PM   #13
SethfromMI
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPoison789 View Post
I'm only 14, I can't go anywhere -.-.

And the stupid counselor lady at school isn't helping, all she does is tell my parents everything which makes it worse! And even though I tried telling her not to she still did.
well at your age you are going to need your parents consent at a lot of places to be able to get/pay for counseling, which I gently tell you I strongly recommend getting

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Old March 28th, 2015, 02:38 PM   #14
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Even after being told by several doctors AND my school, my parents acted like they were never told I needed therapy.

.
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Old March 28th, 2015, 03:20 PM   #15
Mil1dreded
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Hey I'm sorry to hear how you are feeling you need to force your parents to pay for therapy and I know you feel awful I can relate I've had spells of severe depression and anxiety killing yourself is not the answer people will miss you and listen to everyone on this forum they are all really kind and have genuine concern for you they don't want you Kill yourself so try and get the therapy do whatever it takes to get it
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Old March 28th, 2015, 03:49 PM   #16
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I think I'll hold off on my plans for suicide for now >_<. I gotta think things through...Thank you so much, guys.
I honestly think I need to be put in some sort of psychiatric unit, but nobody will listen to me when I try to say so.

I need to be cut off from my immediate family, I can't take it.

.
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Old March 28th, 2015, 07:44 PM   #17
SethfromMI
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPoison789 View Post
I think I'll hold off on my plans for suicide for now >_<. I gotta think things through...Thank you so much, guys.
I honestly think I need to be put in some sort of psychiatric unit, but nobody will listen to me when I try to say so.

I need to be cut off from my immediate family, I can't take it.
well if you go to the hospital and tell them of your problem, depending on the seriousness, they can force you into a psychiatric unit, whether your parents like it or not. I am not sure how extreme it needs to be. talk to your counselor again at school and see if there is anything else you can do. but def hold off because there are still possible choices

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Old March 28th, 2015, 08:39 PM   #18
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

I'll do my best >_<. Just started Spring Break though, but I can hold on for a little longer.

.
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Old March 28th, 2015, 08:51 PM   #19
SethfromMI
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PartyPoison789 View Post
I'll do my best >_<. Just started Spring Break though, but I can hold on for a little longer.
I know you can. it may be tough but you are strong enough

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Old March 28th, 2015, 08:57 PM   #20
WanderingHeart
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Default Re: I have no choices now.

o-o!

Thank you so much to everyone who replied to this. When I forst posted this I was ready to die. You talked me out of suicide when no one else was there for me.

.
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