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Old August 6th, 2014, 05:31 PM   #1
AkuRokuStalker
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Default Diet. may be triggering

I was 5 pounds away from being obese. I wanted to lose weight so I started eating less. At first I was just gonna get smaller proportions then I switched to fruit for almost all my meals. Now I only eat one meal a day, and its slowly becoming less and less on that plate. Sometimes when I eat I have to fight the urge not to go puke it up. Just looking at food can make me sick sometimes even when im starving. I'm starting to get heat flashes and dizzy spells. My stomach will start churning and I will start shaking very bad for no reason... I know whats happening but I cant stop it. Everytime I see that slightly smaller number i'm so happy. I cant reach out because I was labeled as borderline personality disorder and i'm so afraid that anyone I tell will just call me an attention seeker. Im terrified. I know the side effects and I know what will happen I have told so many people why they should not do it. I'm so scared this is the first time I have told anyone whats goiong on....

Everybody has their pasts, nobody is perfect. But at the end of it all even once you slip over that line, even if you pass the brink of insanity, you can still come back.

It's the idea of doing something that society frowns upon. Picking up a habit that society has deemed as socially unacceptable is my own personal 'screw you' to the people around me who feel the constant need to tell me how to behave correctly.
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Old August 7th, 2014, 08:25 PM   #2
CrazyPerson101
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Default Re: Diet. may be triggering

Quote:
Originally Posted by AkuRokuStalker View Post
I was 5 pounds away from being obese. I wanted to lose weight so I started eating less. At first I was just gonna get smaller proportions then I switched to fruit for almost all my meals. Now I only eat one meal a day, and its slowly becoming less and less on that plate. Sometimes when I eat I have to fight the urge not to go puke it up. Just looking at food can make me sick sometimes even when im starving. I'm starting to get heat flashes and dizzy spells. My stomach will start churning and I will start shaking very bad for no reason... I know whats happening but I cant stop it. Everytime I see that slightly smaller number i'm so happy. I cant reach out because I was labeled as borderline personality disorder and i'm so afraid that anyone I tell will just call me an attention seeker. Im terrified. I know the side effects and I know what will happen I have told so many people why they should not do it. I'm so scared this is the first time I have told anyone whats goiong on....

Okay. It sounds like you're not consuming enough food for your body to function properly. You need to start eating more, but don't over eat. If you keep it up, you'll wind up umbalancing the chemicals in your body and your blood pressure will get all wonky and basically, your damaging your body and increasing yourself for death. The heat flashes and body shaking are from chemical imbalance and your blood sugar running low. I had a friend who did the same thing and she had a heart attack and cause her body was so messed up, it killed her so im telling you outta the kindness of my heart.... eat more. I know its easier said than done but its possible.
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Old August 7th, 2014, 10:16 PM   #3
xXl0sth0peXx
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Default Re: Diet. may be triggering

I've kinda eyed this thread for a bit, unsure what to say.. because literally I could have typed everything you just said. I was borderline obese and disgusted and it literally just started as not wanting to hit that mark.. and everything you did say.. is exactly me in a nutshell.

You're absolutely not nourishing yourself enough to sustain your body.. As hard as it is, you really have to reach out to someone. It's a legitimate illness and your health and life are on the line here.

I know exactly how you feel though.. and if you ever need someone to talk to, my PM box is always open for you. x

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Old August 7th, 2014, 10:26 PM   #4
Svan
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Default Re: Diet. may be triggering

When I was very young, around fourteen years old, I was diagnosed with bulimia. There would be days where I'd eat everything in my pantry and throw up 20+ times, sometimes way more than that. Until the beginning of this year, I was extremely sick with that eating disorder, and it finally faded away. Now, because of damaging my body for so many years and ruining my stomach, it's now completely paralyzed and I can no longer eat at all. I am fed through something called a gastrostomy tube that goes directly to my stomach and it allows me to get nutrients that I would get if I were able to eat. So, my point is, do something until it's too late and get help.
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