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Old November 20th, 2017, 12:59 AM   #1
JuliaVT
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Default Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

I'm really close to my sister (I'm 14, she's 15) and we talk about guys and sexual stuff all the time. A couple of weeks ago she told me she and her bf were going to try anal sex. I was like wow since we're both vag virgins. Anyway, on Saturday our parents were out and we were home so her bf came over. They went to her room, turned up some music and I did whatever. A while later I heard what sounded like my sister screaming. I kinda just reacted, ran to her room and opened the door. Not all the way, but enough to see and hear what was going on. I literally froze for a moment like OMG, but then realized that neither of them could see me, so I quietly closed the door again. Now I have a dilemma and a question. First, my sister and I share everything so should I tell her what happened or keep it to myself? I mean, I did try knocking first. And second, since I have a bf too, I'm wondering.... is the first time kinda like that for everyone or maybe she didn't prepare enough?
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Old November 20th, 2017, 01:10 AM   #2
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Maybe you could mention it to her by saying you heard her and wanted to know she’s ok. I’ve heard that it does hurt if it’s too fast but idk.
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Old November 20th, 2017, 01:36 AM   #3
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

This is tough. I'd probably be inclined not to mention it, even though it was an honest and caring mistake. She might say it was an overreaction, or an intrusion, or something you knew was going to happen. But then you'll have to keep that secret to yourself indefinitely. If you do choose to tell her, make sure she understands that you were just worried about her. First time anal can be pretty painful, even if you do prep, use lube, go slowly, etc. so I don't think her vocal response was out of the ordinary.

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Old November 20th, 2017, 04:16 AM   #4
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

lt's up to you but if you've gone a couple of weeks without mentioning it, it might be best to just let sleeping dogs lie.
As for anal, it's not something l've ever tried so whether it hurts or what kind of preparation is required, l'm not much help.
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Old November 20th, 2017, 08:05 AM   #5
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

I agree with the girls above. It's been a couple of weeks and she hasn't brought it up herself, maybe it's good to let it be.
But if you're going to mention it, make sure she understands that you are/were worried and that you want her to be ok. You could mention first that you heard her cry, then wait for her reply and then tell her you opened the door to see if you were okay without realizing that you might be seeing something intimate.

Anal sex can be painful if not done correctly, especially the first time.

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Old November 20th, 2017, 09:45 AM   #6
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

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Maybe you could mention it to her by saying you heard her and wanted to know shes ok. Ive heard that it does hurt if its too fast but idk.
I totally agree with Amelia you should say it to her and let her know that you were just looking out for her just as sisters or friends should do look out for each other. Anal sex is something I would NEVER consider.
Julia your sister is lucky to have you that cares.

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Old November 20th, 2017, 06:29 PM   #7
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

I would let sleeping dogs lie, as Chloe said.

As for trying anal, it's something you have to really think about for yourself and really prepare yourself for, and it is something you and your guy need to have a really frank conversation about. Once was enough for me to last a lifetime.
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Old November 22nd, 2017, 04:12 PM   #8
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Thank you all for the advice. It turned out not to be such a big deal. As I expected, my sister shared the details with me the next night. She said it really hurt when her bf was entering and she screamed. When she said she was surprised I didn't hear her, I told her what happened.....that basically I did hear, was worried, knocked, and peeked in the room for a second to make sure she was okay. I think she was a bit surprised and maybe embarrassed, but not angry. I didn't mention anything about how long or what I saw, so it worked out fine. Regarding the anal experience, she said it hurt a lot going in, then was just uncomfortable most of the time. She called it a strange feeling that hurts and feels kinda good all at the same time. But she has no regrets and wants to do it again. I'm going to see how that goes for her before I consider trying it tho. Thanks again!

Molly...... is that kinda what you were talking about too?
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Old November 22nd, 2017, 05:59 PM   #9
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Nice that you talk to her about that just one quick question you didn’t get exited when talk about sex
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Old November 22nd, 2017, 08:19 PM   #10
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Of course it can be very exciting talking about sex and our bodies. It's very nice having a sis that's close in age, since we're kinda going thru puberty together. We learn from each other and from places like this. Talking about her last experience was very exciting, cause I know my sister did it and I may someday soon too. But it was also hard to hear that she was in pain, too, so I was happy for her and a little sad too I guess.
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Old November 23rd, 2017, 01:04 AM   #11
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Regarding the anal experience, she said it hurt a lot going in, then was just uncomfortable most of the time. She called it a strange feeling that hurts and feels kinda good all at the same time. But she has no regrets and wants to do it again. I'm going to see how that goes for her before I consider trying it tho. Thanks again!
[/QUOTE]

Anal is one of those wierd things that most girls either like, or don't. Your sister's description sounds 100% accurate. I haven't tried it with a guy yet, but it can hurt a lot if you try too much too fast. And I imagine that's what was going on. Seems pretty easy for a guy to go in too fast since they can't feel what we feel. But, if anal turns out to be your thing and you like the rather unusual sensation, then it can be amazing.
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Old November 23rd, 2017, 04:09 AM   #12
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Quote:
Originally Posted by KatieCO2003 View Post
Regarding the anal experience, she said it hurt a lot going in, then was just uncomfortable most of the time. She called it a strange feeling that hurts and feels kinda good all at the same time. But she has no regrets and wants to do it again. I'm going to see how that goes for her before I consider trying it tho. Thanks again!
Anal is one of those wierd things that most girls either like, or don't. Your sister's description sounds 100% accurate. I haven't tried it with a guy yet, but it can hurt a lot if you try too much too fast. And I imagine that's what was going on. Seems pretty easy for a guy to go in too fast since they can't feel what we feel. But, if anal turns out to be your thing and you like the rather unusual sensation, then it can be amazing.[/QUOTE]

I agree, doing something with a guy is much different than by yourself so he has to be more careful. Plus sometimes the guy might not stop or be gentle if it hurts.
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Old November 23rd, 2017, 10:04 AM   #13
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Quote:
Originally Posted by KatieCO2003 View Post
Regarding the anal experience, she said it hurt a lot going in, then was just uncomfortable most of the time. She called it a strange feeling that hurts and feels kinda good all at the same time. But she has no regrets and wants to do it again. I'm going to see how that goes for her before I consider trying it tho. Thanks again!
Anal is one of those wierd things that most girls either like, or don't. Your sister's description sounds 100% accurate. I haven't tried it with a guy yet, but it can hurt a lot if you try too much too fast. And I imagine that's what was going on. Seems pretty easy for a guy to go in too fast since they can't feel what we feel. But, if anal turns out to be your thing and you like the rather unusual sensation, then it can be amazing.[/QUOTE]

Totally agree that it can feel amazing, though very different than vaginal. And yes, girls either seem to like it or they don't, but I think there's a reason for that. The first time can be pretty painful no matter how much you prep because it's new and scary and hard to relax. The next one or two times are better, but can still be a bit uncomfortable. It's not till you get past that point that it really starts to feel amazing. So for girls who only try it once or twice -- especially if the guy doesn't go slow -- they're not going to like it. It's like a certain threshold you have to cross, and some girls never reach it.

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Old November 23rd, 2017, 11:56 AM   #14
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

So glad everything worked out between you and your sister! You are very lucky to have someone you can share so much with. It really helps all of us who rely on this site for info. I got very close to having anal with my ex bf, but parted ways with him first. Starting to get intimate with my new boy now and feel very close to him and it's a next step I think I'd like to take. So I guess I'm in the same place as others here, including you. I think it's something you have to be physically and mentally and emotionally prepared for. Maybe not 100% there yet, but working on it. I know it may hurt at first, but eventually expecting it to feel amazing too.
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Old November 26th, 2017, 11:04 PM   #15
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Default Re: Too Much Info - Sharing and Honesty

Quote:
Originally Posted by Danielle15 View Post
Anal is one of those wierd things that most girls either like, or don't. Your sister's description sounds 100% accurate. I haven't tried it with a guy yet, but it can hurt a lot if you try too much too fast. And I imagine that's what was going on. Seems pretty easy for a guy to go in too fast since they can't feel what we feel. But, if anal turns out to be your thing and you like the rather unusual sensation, then it can be amazing.
Totally agree that it can feel amazing, though very different than vaginal. And yes, girls either seem to like it or they don't, but I think there's a reason for that. The first time can be pretty painful no matter how much you prep because it's new and scary and hard to relax. The next one or two times are better, but can still be a bit uncomfortable. It's not till you get past that point that it really starts to feel amazing. So for girls who only try it once or twice -- especially if the guy doesn't go slow -- they're not going to like it. It's like a certain threshold you have to cross, and some girls never reach it.[/QUOTE]


exactly this

and I think its better that she knows you peeked to see if she was ok especially if you and her are close. maybe she screamed louder than she wanted to just so you'd hear and come rescue her? idk its a thought right? but its great she likes it and wants to try again. you and her could also start doing some anal masturbating to see if you like it too.

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Old November 29th, 2017, 08:06 PM   #16
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Do people really find pleasure from anal? It always seemed gross to me. I guess i should not hate on something i have never tried.
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Old November 30th, 2017, 03:23 AM   #17
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The only thing I would like to add is that the anus is for one thing, and one thing only ...

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Old November 30th, 2017, 07:26 AM   #18
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The only thing I would like to add is that the anus is for one thing, and one thing only ...
I totally agree the anus and sexual pleasure is something I would NEVER consider.

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Old November 30th, 2017, 12:16 PM   #19
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A lot of people get pleasure from it. Not everyone though.
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Old November 30th, 2017, 02:05 PM   #20
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I never really thought about it but now I am intrigued
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