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Old November 19th, 2017, 03:58 PM   #1
Dalcourt
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Default In vain

I have worked hard over the last years to get better, to lead a useful life.
I fought my dark shadows, the voices in my head, the urge to destroy myself and others.
Now I seem to be back at the very beginning. It feels like all my strength has left me. All I worked for was for nothing.
I feel like another me has come back after a very long sleep. Things look and feel so unreal right now.
It scares me.
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Old November 19th, 2017, 06:15 PM   #2
Just JT
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Hey bro you know that thing called life? Itís like that. Ups and downs. I th8 k right now you might be feeling really down about stuff. Maybe cause your sick?

But youíve made huge strides since I known you. We all have our ups and downs. Me to. You know that. Just keep your head up and try and be positive?

Whatís going on anyways? Someth8ng bring this on?

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Old November 19th, 2017, 11:18 PM   #3
Dalcourt
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This has. all built up over a longer period of time. Since around July or so to be honest. Maybe I should have gotten help earlier but I thought maybe it isn't so bad for a long time.
Well, there is no use to think about what could have been done. What happens now happens.

I'm not feeling down because I'm sick. It is basically the other way round. My body breaks down because of my mental break down.
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Old November 20th, 2017, 01:36 AM   #4
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Default Re: In vain

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dalcourt View Post
This has. all built up over a longer period of time. Since around July or so to be honest. Maybe I should have gotten help earlier but I thought maybe it isn't so bad for a long time.
Well, there is no use to think about what could have been done. What happens now happens.

I'm not feeling down because I'm sick. It is basically the other way round. My body breaks down because of my mental break down.
Mental illness is a form of sickness like any other illness. It is not the other way around and it is not your fault.
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Old November 20th, 2017, 03:25 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by Uniquemind View Post
Mental illness is a form of sickness like any other illness. It is not the other way around and it is not your fault.
Well basically it is my own fault I'm afraid. I know about my mental state and I can read the symptoms. I just didn't wanna see the signs and go and seek help.
And now I'm in a really bad state and this could ruin my entire future.
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Old November 21st, 2017, 02:39 AM   #6
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Well basically it is my own fault I'm afraid. I know about my mental state and I can read the symptoms. I just didn't wanna see the signs and go and seek help.
And now I'm in a really bad state and this could ruin my entire future.
Unless you committed a crime, your future is not ruined.
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Old November 21st, 2017, 05:40 AM   #7
Just JT
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dalcourt View Post
Well basically it is my own fault I'm afraid. I know about my mental state and I can read the symptoms. I just didn't wanna see the signs and go and seek help.
And now I'm in a really bad state and this could ruin my entire future.
I donít think itís ever to late to get help like this. Sure maybe earlier you shoulda coulda woulda but....

Either way, help now is still better than no help at all....right?

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Old November 21st, 2017, 11:36 PM   #8
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Unless you committed a crime, your future is not ruined.
Well maybe not entirely ruined but for the most part. My mental problems make me unable to go on at school like I do at the moment. I had to leave school last time and if I leave noworries again I won't have my scholarships and all and won't be able to do what I planned.
I simply don't have the financial means doing it a longer and more quieter way.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Just JT View Post
I donít think itís ever to late to get help like this. Sure maybe earlier you shoulda coulda woulda but....

Either way, help now is still better than no help at all....right?
Sure put since even if I do get help it won't last. I have to face it. I will never really get better and I'm just unfit for a normal life.
I guess it has a reason that my family with a long history of mental illnesses consists of just weirdos who never really amounted to anything at all.
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Old November 22nd, 2017, 04:53 AM   #9
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Well maybe not entirely ruined but for the most part. My mental problems make me unable to go on at school like I do at the moment. I had to leave school last time and if I leave noworries again I won't have my scholarships and all and won't be able to do what I planned.
I simply don't have the financial means doing it a longer and more quieter way.


Sure put since even if I do get help it won't last. I have to face it. I will never really get better and I'm just unfit for a normal life.
I guess it has a reason that my family with a long history of mental illnesses consists of just weirdos who never really amounted to anything at all.
Everyone's a little weird and mental illness struggles are really common. It actually needs it's own movement in the USA, in a similar way the #MeToo movement is gaining traction.

Financial aid isn't the only source for money for education. How you do in school doesn't drive what success in adult life will be.
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Old November 22nd, 2017, 11:06 AM   #10
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I agree. You are who you are, weíre all weird in our own way. Doesnít matter what others perceive us as. If youíre ok with things, and do stuff that you like then just be happy. Donít be so judgmental of yourself. You are a very good person. We all have problems in life. Some just more than others right?

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