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Old August 28th, 2017, 07:10 AM   #1
ambitious_eclipse
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Default My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

I don't have autism and I'm nowhere on the spectrum. But my best friend is, my boyfriend is, and several other friends are.


So when my "friend" said "*AUTISTIC SCREECHING*" in response to something I said (which was "everyone deserves to be respected") I stood up for myself.

I'm the mod of the Discord server, so I said, "If you say that again, I'm banning you. It's wrong and completely unnecessary."

And then she went around telling everyone my deepest, darkest secrets, because we were pretty close friends and I had told her some stuff.

I had a panic-induced seizure and started throwing up violently last night...

I don't know what to do. I'm not mad, just disappointed in her immaturity.
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Old August 28th, 2017, 04:44 PM   #2
jamie_n5
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

Well you need to talk to her face to face. Tell her how you feel and what she caused you to go through. Make sure that she totally understands that you are not autistic and that she needs to quit saying that and telling that to others. Then address the issue of telling people your private things that you have put in her confidence. She needs to know that if she keeps doing these things that it will totally end your friendship.

I am gay and happy with that.
I love talking to people very open & willing to listen.
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Old August 29th, 2017, 11:01 PM   #3
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

She doesn't sound like much of a friend to me. If you're not close try to distance yourself. If you are close try to salvage your friendship with an honest face to face conversation.

Let me also say that you sound like a wonderful person by looking through peoples mental illnesses and seeing them for who they really are.


Canada / Sport Management (Hockey) Major / Straight / Left-Wing Progressive / 18 yrs old

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Old August 30th, 2017, 03:38 PM   #4
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

She isnt a friend is she would do that. Thats horrible and disgusting
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Old September 1st, 2017, 05:54 PM   #5
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

Find a new friend-one who is not
going to put u down.
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Old September 2nd, 2017, 08:36 AM   #6
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

I agree. Your giving her more credit than she deserves. Friends don't do that to friends. It's ok to be friends and have a difference of opinion and disagree on topics. By her actions she not only proved how immature she is, but also ruthless.

You over estimated someone's intent on being a friend. Chalk that up to a learning experience. What out is out and that's that. You can't take back her words. Neither can she. What's done is done. And people will see what she's doing to you. And that'll leave her alone eventually. Or with others just like her.

So just go forward like nothing's changed, be yourself, don't be public about nothing. People will see that as well, and see yiur maturity. And people will be with you. People like yourself, friends you deserve

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Old November 6th, 2017, 04:55 PM   #7
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ambitious_eclipse View Post
I don't have autism and I'm nowhere on the spectrum. But my best friend is, my boyfriend is, and several other friends are.


So when my "friend" said "*AUTISTIC SCREECHING*" in response to something I said (which was "everyone deserves to be respected") I stood up for myself.

I'm the mod of the Discord server, so I said, "If you say that again, I'm banning you. It's wrong and completely unnecessary."

And then she went around telling everyone my deepest, darkest secrets, because we were pretty close friends and I had told her some stuff.

I had a panic-induced seizure and started throwing up violently last night...

I don't know what to do. I'm not mad, just disappointed in her immaturity.
I'm wondering why she made the autistic screeching in the first place (and also, what exactly do you mean by "autistic screeching"?) If she might an inappropriate comment about people with autism, yeah, I'd definitely ban her or warn her. But I'm wondering, why would she do that to begin with, if she's really your friend? A friend wouldn't do that. That doesn't sound right. Did you do something to irritate her? (I'm not saying it's right, because it's not, I'm just wondering what else is going on here.)

Anyway, that being said, if you did something wrong, I'd apologize. If not, and if the meanness is all on her, I'd ban her. It sounds like she's not your friend. A friend wouldn't do that to you.That doesn't sound like immaturity to me; that sounds like hostility. That's really mean. I'd avoid her and ignore her at all costs; it sounds like she has anger issues and some personal problems--maybe abuse or neglect? Idk, but if what you're saying is true, she isn't a real friend. I'm wondering, though, how the whole conversation went and what was said in the first place.

Either way, it sounds like you did the right thing by standing up for yourself--good job! I hope you feel better and that everything turns out ok. If it makes you feel any better, there aren't any uncommon secrets....meaning, the things that make us feel so abnormal or the things that make us all the same. Don't let anyone make you feel ashamed or inferior because of your secrets, whatever they are--because whatever they are, I'm sure they are normal things , secrets that other people have, too, and you might just make some new close friends from this.
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Old November 6th, 2017, 05:49 PM   #8
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Default Re: My friend called me autistic, and I tried to stand up for myself.

Quote:
Originally Posted by dancedreamergirl View Post
I'm wondering why she made the autistic screeching in the first place (and also, what exactly do you mean by "autistic screeching"?) If she might an inappropriate comment about people with autism, yeah, I'd definitely ban her or warn her. But I'm wondering, why would she do that to begin with, if she's really your friend? A friend wouldn't do that. That doesn't sound right. Did you do something to irritate her? (I'm not saying it's right, because it's not, I'm just wondering what else is going on here.)

Anyway, that being said, if you did something wrong, I'd apologize. If not, and if the meanness is all on her, I'd ban her. It sounds like she's not your friend. A friend wouldn't do that to you.That doesn't sound like immaturity to me; that sounds like hostility. That's really mean. I'd avoid her and ignore her at all costs; it sounds like she has anger issues and some personal problems--maybe abuse or neglect? Idk, but if what you're saying is true, she isn't a real friend. I'm wondering, though, how the whole conversation went and what was said in the first place.

Either way, it sounds like you did the right thing by standing up for yourself--good job! I hope you feel better and that everything turns out ok. If it makes you feel any better, there aren't any uncommon secrets....meaning, the things that make us feel so abnormal or the things that make us all the same. Don't let anyone make you feel ashamed or inferior because of your secrets, whatever they are--because whatever they are, I'm sure they are normal things , secrets that other people have, too, and you might just make some new close friends from this.
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