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Old August 21st, 2016, 07:51 AM   #1
Tesserax
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Name: Aaron
Join Date: November 3, 2014
Age: 19
Gender: Cisgender Male
Default My ongoing struggle.

I'm going to keep it simple.

Every once in awhile I get immense bouts of just depressive feelings, many of which I believe stem from loneliness. I find myself envying happy couples, I want to find the right person that I can share my life with, but in doing so I have had to be patient, and I've been waiting and looking for so long I'm starting to question if there is truly somebody out there like myself.

I can't control these feelings, and they're affecting my life in that I can hardly find the motivation during these periods of lonesomeness and self-pity, nor can I think properly or effectively enough to work properly.

Worst part is, our final exams are just 9 weeks and 3 days away, and I'm afraid that my lack of self-control caused by this problem will ruin my chances to get into medicine. I'm just so terribly afraid, I don't want this to ruin my life or future but if feels like it's going to.

I don't know how to control it, but I want to. I'm considering talking to the right teachers about this, but besides that I'm afraid it will affect me regardless.

Does anybody know what I can do? I just want control back, I want the control. I need control.

Hey guys, this is partially for me but also for anybody else who may want it; my diary: http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/fo...play.php?f=514

For those who care: I've changed my username, I used to be Doc. Maestro
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Old August 21st, 2016, 09:37 AM   #2
Just JT
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Join Date: June 27, 2015
Location: Kingdom of God
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Default Re: My ongoing struggle.

Talking is a good first step. If a teacher is the best option for you then do that. Do you have guidance counselors at school? Even your parents may help, but I don't know your living situation.
Your talking here, that's a start, that's better than doing somethin you regret.
If there is anything I can do to help please let me or anyone here know
Thers lots of good,people who are willing to help if they can
Nobody like to watch someone struggle is anything like this


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Old August 21st, 2016, 09:57 AM   #3
Emeka
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Join Date: July 29, 2016
Location: Nigeria
Gender: Male
Default Re: My ongoing struggle.

I agree with Just JT. Talking always help. As in talking about it not necessairly getting advice from other people. They may not know as much as they think. If something bothers me I find a 'sucker' to listen to my monologue hahaaaa. Just jesting.

Someone told me when I felt the way you did that 1. I was over thinking it. 2. My standards for the girl that will be in my life were too high or not flexible enough. Does any apply to you?
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Old August 21st, 2016, 08:42 PM   #4
Ben7
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Join Date: August 15, 2016
Location: West Coast, US
Gender: Male
Default Re: My ongoing struggle.

I agree with what other people have commented here so I will not repeat that, but you should really think about what they have said.

Just something to add to what they said though:
You are just 17, I dare say that you've still got a lot of time to find someone who is right for you, someone who is like you, someone to spend the rest of your life with. You shouldn't agonize over having to find someone, the one, right now or right away. I'm sure in college and beyond you will have classes with people who share your interests, you will join clubs or attend events wherein you will more likely be able to find others who also share your views and interests. I'd say you have a lot to look forward to in life and throughout it all you will have many opportunities to find the person you are looking for. For now, why not take a step back? Enjoy life, enjoy what you have right now and don't worry so much about finding someone, you'll have plenty of time and chances for that later on. Good luck!
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Old August 22nd, 2016, 10:38 AM   #5
jamie_n5
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Name: Jamie
Join Date: June 27, 2016
Location: Minnesota
Age: 19
Gender: Male
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Default Re: My ongoing struggle.

There is nothing wrong with you or your personality. I know it is hard to be patient when you are worried about something. Talking to people is good. As said by others teachers or a counselor might be very helpful. There is and will be someone out there for you man. You are 17 and have plenty of time to find someone. If you are going into medicine you have a long and very hard road ahead of you. Your studies are going to take up the majority of your time. You very well may meet that special person in college. Try not to worry about your love life right now and work on school. Good luck with both.

I am gay and happy with that.
I love talking to people very open & willing to listen.
I am also glad to try help with questions or problems.
Hit me up for anything. I promise I don't bite.
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Old August 22nd, 2016, 11:11 AM   #6
DriveAlive
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Join Date: June 2, 2015
Location: USA
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Default Re: My ongoing struggle.

You are very smart for sharing your feelings. It is not good to keep these emotions to yourself and it is a lot easier to overcome them when you talk to others about it.

Human intimacy is a natural desire for all people. This can be accomplished in a relationship, but also in close friendships. However, this does not seem to be the root of your unhappiness. You say that you want control in your life. One of the best strategies for getting control of your life is building strong personal discipline through daily habits. If you tell yourself that you will do just three easy tasks every day and you force yourself to stick to them no matter what, you will become more disciplined and have better control of your life. My example is Kevin O'Leary from Shark Tank. He says that everyday he exercises for one hour, reads the newspaper, and checks the foreign stock markets. He does not do anything else no matter how pressing until he has completed these three goals. This is how he centers himself, takes control of his day, and gives himself the energy to work hard. Try to find your own three goals and commit to them.

19 | Vegetarian | Bisexual | Republican

Majoring in Biochemistry

Here is my AMA thread, please ask me anything!
http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/sh....php?t=2030289
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