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Old July 8th, 2016, 09:42 PM   #1
Dalcourt
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Default I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

Something very bad happened to me and I felt I can't just go on anymore.
I was drinking, smoking weed etc. just to numb myself but I felt it wasn't really enough.
I took my grandma's sleeping pills hoping it would kill me. I just got tired and dizzy but that was about it. As I felt it wasn't working I got so mad...why the fuck can't even die!?
I got a razor blade an tried to cut my wrist...blood was flowing way to slow I guess it was because I was sedated from all the stuff I had taken before.

Unfortunately my aunt who still was with us due to 4th of July celebration stuff found me...as I had passed out in the bathroom.
I have no idea what really happened...just woke in my bed with a bandaged arm and my aunt and cousin at my bedside.

I feel horrible...I'm even too much of a loser to kill myself. How can you be even too stupid to end your life properly.
I can't just go on like that. I don't want to.
There are so many bad things happening in my life...I have no idea how to handle them anymore.
But obviously I'm even to stupid to kill myself.
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Old July 8th, 2016, 10:16 PM   #2
lliam
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peanut_ View Post
I feel horrible...I'm even too much of a loser to kill myself. But obviously I'm even to stupid to kill myself.
In this case, feel lucky being such a loser. And keep your special stupidity.

Cause now you've the chance to find out constructively how to change everything what goes wrong in your life ... for the better.





"Life is that prison you'll never leave alive."



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Old July 8th, 2016, 10:40 PM   #3
Dalcourt
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

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Originally Posted by lliam View Post
In this case, feel lucky being such a loser. And keep your special stupidity.

Cause now you've the chance to find out constructively how to change everything what goes wrong in your life ... for the better.
oh belive me I'm done trying to change all the shit that does wrong for the better. for one problem I solve I get five new smacked around my head.
I feel I just have to think of a better way to end it, ya know.
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Old July 9th, 2016, 04:48 PM   #4
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

No man you are not stupid and like me I think God saved you for a purpose to live. The night I came out as gay to my parents things went horribly wrong my parents reaction was horrible. Things worked out alright later. Anyway I went up to my room and loaded my pistol and had it up to my head ready to pull the trigger. Now believe this or not God or something spoke to me and said no son you don't do this I have plans for you. It scared me so bad I put the gun down and unloaded it and put it away. Man I am so glad I did that. My whole life has changed I am happy now and things are good. Just remember suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem. Hang in there my friend.

I am gay and happy with that.
I love talking to people very open & willing to listen.
I am also glad to try help with questions or problems.
Hit me up for anything. I promise I don't bite.
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Old July 9th, 2016, 05:10 PM   #5
Jay21
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

No, please do not tell yourself that, you are not stupid. Suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems. While you may think there is nothing worth living for right now, trust me, everything will become better. You still have a family that loves you, you have friends that care about you, and of course there's the community on here that also care about you. Please reconsider doing this, believe me, it is not worth it.
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Old July 9th, 2016, 05:13 PM   #6
Just JT
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

Tyler we've all been in a place at one point or another where we're close, real close. I have to, and like @Jamin_n is saying, it's true, God has a plan for you, he made it not happen, it's not your turn yet bro.

You just need to have faith in that, and see what's in store for you, I promise you it'll be good, you'll like it, and be happy you tried.

Besides, I haven't meet you yet, and I do plan on doing that, some day, and I don't want it to be at your funeral bro
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Old July 9th, 2016, 05:19 PM   #7
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Default Re: I'm failing even at suicide *maybe triggerish*

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peanut_ View Post
Something very bad happened to me and I felt I can't just go on anymore.
I was drinking, smoking weed etc. just to numb myself but I felt it wasn't really enough.
I took my grandma's sleeping pills hoping it would kill me. I just got tired and dizzy but that was about it. As I felt it wasn't working I got so mad...why the fuck can't even die!?
I got a razor blade an tried to cut my wrist...blood was flowing way to slow I guess it was because I was sedated from all the stuff I had taken before.

Unfortunately my aunt who still was with us due to 4th of July celebration stuff found me...as I had passed out in the bathroom.
I have no idea what really happened...just woke in my bed with a bandaged arm and my aunt and cousin at my bedside.

I feel horrible...I'm even too much of a loser to kill myself. How can you be even too stupid to end your life properly.
I can't just go on like that. I don't want to.
There are so many bad things happening in my life...I have no idea how to handle them anymore.
But obviously I'm even to stupid to kill myself.
Well thank god you're okay!! Please don't kill yourself!! If you feel you want to, see your aunt about it!! Are you on anti depressants?


I'm a prettyyy awkward weeb that likes alcohol and punk rock :')
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