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Old March 30th, 2012, 11:29 AM   #1
FojeJC
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Unhappy Umm... What's wrong with me?

Whenever I look at someone, I get pictures or films how to kill (viciously) them with the surrounding objects, sometimes with bare hands even. I've always had this since I can remember. I do have dark thoughts in general but these are the ones that give the most impact on my daily life.
It was beneficial sometimes for self defence i guess but sometimes it gets out of hand like when I'm mad and get provoked by someone else, I get the film and I start to do exactly what I saw, I once dislocated the person's arm and was about to break their neck with my foot.

I used to get thoughts telling me that I was an idiot for not killing them, saying that they deserved it and that I was a coward for not doing it. I've blocked these out or they just went away, I used to think my sub conscious was evil or I wasn't human.

And you know what's the worst thing about it, i enjoyed hurting them, i enjoyed that they couldn't do anything to stop me, it felt as if I just took some sort of ecstasy pill or a adrenaline rush. But I didn't want hurt them... I didn't need to hurt them...
Another example of this is this morning when I was getting ready for school and saw my mom picking up a plastic bottle, I straight a way had a little film clip of me shoving it down her throat. Is this some kind of disorder or something? Am I a gonna be serial killer or do I have a mental illness? Am i just evil? Please help...

Last edited by FojeJC; April 1st, 2012 at 06:27 PM.
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Old March 30th, 2012, 12:28 PM   #2
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

Have you tried to go at a psychologist to discuss about it?
Are you a person who gets anxious easily?

Maybe I'm a bit crazy but at least I'm different than those nonsense, stupid people, you know, the normal ones?

But on the other hand I'm just a normal,stupid human...

Strange isn't it? How is it possible to be different and at the same time so same with the others...?

Last edited by DarkNick; March 30th, 2012 at 02:43 PM.
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Old March 30th, 2012, 12:41 PM   #3
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

No because my mom thinks I'm a hypochondriac but I might go myself one day.
And no, I defiantly don't get easily anxious.
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Old March 30th, 2012, 02:46 PM   #4
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

Hmmm...
I think it's illegal to go at a psychologist alone if you're not 18,at least in my country (not very encouraging I know)
You have to explain to your mother that teenagers may have similar to yours problems and that she doesn't have to lose anything if you go to a psychologist...

Maybe I'm a bit crazy but at least I'm different than those nonsense, stupid people, you know, the normal ones?

But on the other hand I'm just a normal,stupid human...

Strange isn't it? How is it possible to be different and at the same time so same with the others...?
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Old March 30th, 2012, 03:22 PM   #5
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

I guess so...
I just wanted to know if anyone had some sort of thing like this or if it's even a disorder or something...,
Thanks though.
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Old March 30th, 2012, 04:12 PM   #6
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

You need to see someone. That's wrong, and I don't know if it is just you, but probably there must have been something that has made you become this. Go and see a psychiatrist immediately, with a parent. You're gonna end up doing something one day you'll regret.
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Old March 31st, 2012, 03:40 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Shadow View Post
You need to see someone. That's wrong, and I don't know if it is just you, but probably there must have been something that has made you become this. Go and see a psychiatrist immediately, with a parent. You're gonna end up doing something one day you'll regret.
What do you mean something made me this way?
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Old March 31st, 2012, 09:45 AM   #8
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

I am sorry to say this, but I think it is a problem unique to you.
You should DEFINITELY see someone about this, because one day, you might just actually kill someone.

Good luck!

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Old March 31st, 2012, 10:05 AM   #9
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Eh... well, can't blame for trying.

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Old April 2nd, 2012, 11:20 PM   #10
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

I don't know.

I suggest you speak to someone about this because to be honest this is far from natural and because you have a tendinitis to act on what you see, you could end up in a lot of trouble.

I suggest you speak to someone soon.


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Old April 3rd, 2012, 12:24 PM   #11
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

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Originally Posted by SilverWolf View Post
I don't know.

I suggest you speak to someone about this because to be honest this is far from natural and because you have a tendinitis to act on what you see, you could end up in a lot of trouble.

I suggest you speak to someone soon.
Tendinitis? Do you mean tendency?

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Old May 8th, 2012, 01:17 AM   #12
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mirage View Post
I am sorry to say this, but I think it is a problem unique to you.
You should DEFINITELY see someone about this, because one day, you might just actually kill someone.

Good luck!
i wouldnt say this is a unique "problem" i am very similar to this and alot of the time i picture a way of how i could set them on fire after i beat the living crap out of them
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Old May 12th, 2012, 04:18 PM   #13
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i wouldnt say this is a unique "problem" i am very similar to this and alot of the time i picture a way of how i could set them on fire after i beat the living crap out of them
Hmmm... besides the arsonist idea, I guess we're slightly similar, but I don't think you've had these.

I've started having dreams that take some of my visions and... turn them into a massacre. I used to think a vision of me killing one person was bad... this shit is fucked up. Since last week I've started having less of those visions whenever I see someone but now have a lot of those dreams, I hardly can sleep anymore.

The dream usually starts with me walking into a crowd of people and one of them grabbing me and pulling me back, then a dozen grab my legs and my face. After me struggling to move, a man in black clothes carrying a knife stabs me in the neck. Everything goes fuzzy and when it goes back to normal I grab the knife from my throat and start viciously killing people around me, people I know, even my family. After some dozen dead, I... have a smile on my face and then I start laughing... I leave the knife on the floor and... start biting or eating the people around me, I then break necks with my hands and rip out intestines, gouge eyeballs... it just gets worse from there.
In the end I get pulled by the dark man and fall, then I wake up sweating like a pig as if I was actually getting fatigue from killing all of them. I went to a doctor and asked for something to ease my dreaming, and he gave me some pills but I haven't tried them yet.
Please, give me opinions about these dreams.

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Old May 14th, 2012, 11:16 PM   #14
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

ive started having dreams where im on a bus in the middle of the city, waiting untill its full. i then burst into flames ripping off peoples heads around me hitting others with them, taking out their spines and strangling others with them. next i get off the bus go into a church running up and eating the priest shouting"satan is here to rule" then literally ripping everyone to shreds. next my 2 year old brother walks in... i throw a church pew at him. i look towards the sky, shout like a madman then everything i see catches immediate fire. everyone i kill is either my friends or my family. ive heard voices in my head before that tell me to grab scissors or knives, tree limbs and kill people before. its almost happened twice. and i mean they have almost died twice. were both fucked up.

ive tried to stop sleeping before. it works untill i have a migrane and pass out on the couch or in my bed for the rest of the day. then wake up sweating like a pig. then have violent visions the rest of the day. but i think its better than the dream.

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Old May 15th, 2012, 12:17 AM   #15
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluerhino666 View Post
ive started having dreams where im on a bus in the middle of the city, waiting untill its full. i then burst into flames ripping off peoples heads around me hitting others with them, taking out their spines and strangling others with them. next i get off the bus go into a church running up and eating the priest shouting"satan is here to rule" then literally ripping everyone to shreds. next my 2 year old brother walks in... i throw a church pew at him. i look towards the sky, shout like a madman then everything i see catches immediate fire. everyone i kill is either my friends or my family. ive heard voices in my head before that tell me to grab scissors or knives, tree limbs and kill people before. its almost happened twice. and i mean they have almost died twice. were both fucked up.

ive tried to stop sleeping before. it works untill i have a migrane and pass out on the couch or in my bed for the rest of the day. then wake up sweating like a pig. then have violent visions the rest of the day. but i think its better than the dream.
Ever tryed seroquel?

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Old May 15th, 2012, 06:35 PM   #16
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

Seroquel is for people with schizophrenia and/or bipolar disease (and depression). I amazingly don't suffer from either of those disorders, and I'm not depressed, that's one thing that annoys me the most, I don't even get scared or sad due to the dreams/visions anymore... sometimes I find them entertaining... that's the only reason I post it online- am I evil or a future sociopath?

Your dreams seem to have more... representations, for example the church/satanic belief or even the arsonist idea, though the dream is still similar through the methods of killing and the actual number of kills, have you tested for bipolar disorder or schizophrenia?

Anyway, the sleep easing pills didn't make any difference neither did the ones to put me to sleep, I'm starting to believe that I'm just going to have to live with it, every day of my life...
That thought makes me bored.

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Old May 21st, 2012, 12:45 AM   #17
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

no ive not tested for either bi polar or schitzophrenia, but im considering it. i do have an amazingly terrible case of ADHD though. and my dreams have gotten worse, they now continue from everything catching fire untill i scramble through the desert having a live zebra for a meal, finding a nursery and ripping the innards out of the babies. and my grandmother got cancer putting me through more mental stress. i have acctualy burned down an old shed in a field since i last posted, making me crave more.
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Old May 21st, 2012, 07:20 AM   #18
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

I'm starting to find this crap quite entertaining.
I must ask you, do you find relief or release of tension and stress when you commit arson/start a fire?
If so, it might possibly be involved with the Pyromania disorder, but that doesn't explain the horrific dreams. I suggest getting tested for schizophrenia and bipolar disorder.

Oh, and the doctor increased my sleeping pills to the double than the normal for a grown adult.

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Old May 21st, 2012, 11:21 PM   #19
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

while there still is a fire going i feel like what i believe to be normal, but when it ends i have a blank state of mind for a couple seconds, then the inner demons re-emerge from my core being stronger than ever giving me the most violent visions and feelings to kill. i completly mutilated a raccon with my bare hands after the shed fire. and in my dreams i am now wearing part of the zebra i ate as a hat and use the babies teeth as blades in a blender making the innards and bones into a nice refreshing beverage and drinking it out of a coconut on the beach.
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Old May 24th, 2012, 04:59 PM   #20
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Default Re: Umm... What's wrong with me?

No idea...
I usually have a conclusion but you might bugged me.
I still think it might be involved with the pyromania disorder and something else,
Or you're screwing with me.

Anyway, have you've always had these dreams or temptations to burn?

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