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Old February 1st, 2013, 07:04 PM   #1
Junior Member+
Name: Jacob "JASON"
Join Date: February 17, 2011
Location: Battery City
Gender: Male
Exclamation How do I live my life?

I've recently realised that I've been hearing a voice in my head that wasn't actually real. I mean, it seemed real to ME, but no one else heard it and there never seemed to be any source of the noise. As I've said on here before, I only really have a few friends in the entire world, but even they seemed slightly shocked when I told them. Since I realised this voice wasn't real, the entire way I've perceived the world has changed. At first everything seemed perfect, the way light shone through the trees in a dreamy sort of way. But now everything seems much darker. I can honestly not tell whether any of my life is real or not. I managed to tell my parents, which led to them telling a doctor which led to that doctor referring me to a professional psychiatrist. I've been kept off of school for the past week, as the voice has told me, in the past, to kill myself. I've been told that what I'm suffering may be a form of "undifferentiated schizophrenia". My best friend seemed slightly surprised at this, too. I'm no longer allowed to leave the house alone. Ever. I've been told I'll need some form of medication, but I'm not too sure how I can live my life, anymore. I feel like all I want is for someone to care for me, but I don't trust any doctors, my friends have all been spying on me and talking behind my back and my parents hate me because of what an abomination I've become. I need something to help me. Some kind of FIX. I want someone to hold. Someone to hold me. The voice keeps telling me nobody cares, and everybody keeps proving it right. Can somebody please just suggest something I could do to keep on going. I feel like I'm near the end!

Last edited by dajakesta10; February 1st, 2013 at 07:18 PM. Reason: Mistype
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Old February 1st, 2013, 07:11 PM   #2
Name: Demy
Join Date: January 23, 2013
Location: America
Gender: Female
Blog Entries: 1
Default Re: How do I live my life?

I am so sorry for you...
I had a friend that had schizophrenia. She killed herself because of the voice telling her to do so.
You NEED to go to the psychiatrist. Never listen to the voice. It's desperate and wants to hurt you.
Schizophrenia is like a meltdown. You have to stop it before it starts. If you need talk to me. I may not, nor will I ever, know what it's like. But I'm still here for you.
The voice is wrong. People DO care. You shouldn't listen to it. I care. People here care.
Please, if you need, talk to me.
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Old February 4th, 2013, 09:49 PM   #3
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Join Date: May 20, 2012
Location: Nowhere
Gender: Male
Default Re: How do I live my life?

I dont have that voice, but i get many suicidal thoughts. its screwing up my life
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Old February 4th, 2013, 10:28 PM   #4
Name: Sid
Join Date: December 19, 2012
Location: Denver, Colorado
Gender: Male
Default Re: How do I live my life?

Trust me, you have people who you can talk to and who can be friends! Everyone on VT can support you in some way: shape or form! And I am one of them! Maybe you should keep a diary about the voices tell you, maybe they can give you ideas! I think that maybe if the "voice" should tell you to commit sucide or somethin' maybe you should go tell your parents to go see a physcologist or somethin'. Anyway, I am here to listen!
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Old March 11th, 2013, 04:30 PM   #5
Join Date: March 9, 2013
Gender: Male
Default Re: How do I live my life?


Last edited by rocketsheep; April 6th, 2016 at 01:09 AM.
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Old March 12th, 2013, 08:37 PM   #6
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Join Date: August 26, 2012
Gender: Undisclosed
Default Re: How do I live my life?

I don't know how much this relates, but since second grade I had a voice in my head that was like my best friend. Later he became something like a boyfriend for me. In the past year, I've been coming to terms with the fact that he might not be real and it kills me. No one else has ever loved me like that, and I don't think anyone ever will. So everyday, I have to tell myself that I'm okay without him.

I think you should do something like that too. Don't let yourself think that no one cares. People do. I care, for one. Tell yourself every day that people care.

Another thing that has helped me; promise someone, anyone, that you won't kill yourself. Stupid as it sounds, it helps to have that little thing to keep you here. Every day remind yourself of that promise, even when it gets really tough.

I'm sorry you're in this situation, but you'll get through it.
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