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Old January 18th, 2007, 05:53 PM   #21
schrei jess
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Default Re: Suicide

Well it went okay, we didnt talk much about suicide or depression so I didnt feel tense like I normally do. He wanted to send me to the hospital to keep me from hurting myself because when he asked if I would do anything I said I dont know, because I honestly dont, but I guess I convinced him that I dont need to go to the hospital. So Im here again, Im going to make it through another night, Im going to try. I hope I dont have to go to school tomorrow, I asked my therapist to tell my mother that I shouldnt go, I dont know if he did. He said I was making threats though, I said I would hurt myself to stay out of school if I had to, and that is true - I would, Ill see how it goes tomorrow I guess.

He says he wants to understand me, he wants to read my boys love manga 0_o I found that a little weird, but as long as I dont have to talk about much, Ill let him look at it. It was weird though, he got me to admit a lot about things, like how I wish I wasnt a girl and yeah, a lot. Maybe it's going to start working. I can only hope.

I DO NOT GO ON HERE ANYMORE. I HAVE LEFT THIS PLACE FOR GOOD AND DON'T INTEND ON COMING BACK. PLEASE DON'T FRIEND REQUEST ME, PRIVATE MESSAGE ME, OR ANYTHING BECAUSE I WILL NEVER SEE IT AND YOU'LL NEVER GET A RESPONSE. THANK YOU.
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Old January 18th, 2007, 06:06 PM   #22
Sapphire
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Default Re: Suicide

Maybe taking it minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day is best.

If he hasn't found a way in to your mind and how you think then he could get an insight just by reading your "boys love manga" (not sure what this is, but I'm assuming you wrote it) If you don't feel like you are up to much talking then maybe this would be a good thing.

It all sounds promising Jess. (I hope you don't mind me using your first name, I don't really like referring to people by username.) As I said take it life hour by hour if you have to.


~ The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step ~

* Nothing in the world has ever been accomplished without passion *
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Old January 18th, 2007, 06:15 PM   #23
schrei jess
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Yeah I guess, Ill take it bit by bit.

And no I didnt write the manga, I bought it. I had it with me to read incase Id have to wait a little, and he was interested. Boys love, or shonen-ai, basically the fluffy, cuddling, just kissing version of yaoi, which is the hard-core, involves sex, aspect of boys love relationships. Sadly, I cant buy the yaoi mangas T_T Has 18+ thing on it. So I bought Loveless, and Gravitation, the shonen-ai mangas.

And as long as I dont have to do much talking, Im up for anything, Im just not ready to talk yet, but Im getting there...I think.

I DO NOT GO ON HERE ANYMORE. I HAVE LEFT THIS PLACE FOR GOOD AND DON'T INTEND ON COMING BACK. PLEASE DON'T FRIEND REQUEST ME, PRIVATE MESSAGE ME, OR ANYTHING BECAUSE I WILL NEVER SEE IT AND YOU'LL NEVER GET A RESPONSE. THANK YOU.
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Old January 18th, 2007, 06:21 PM   #24
Sapphire
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Default Re: Suicide

Oh, that sounds cool.

There's no real time pressure to talk in sessions. (or at least here there isn't, it should be the same in America but I dont know) If you don't want to talk then no one can make you, and in the interests of helping you your therapist should be employing this. (It sounds as if he is which is also good)

You are coming across as a lot more positive than you were when you posted the orginal post. Is this accurate? If so, then that's great!


~ The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step ~

* Nothing in the world has ever been accomplished without passion *
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Old January 18th, 2007, 07:21 PM   #25
thesphinx
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Default Re: Suicide

Thats good just take it day by day, ive been battling my severe clinical depression for almost 8+ months now i know its not as much compared to you but believe me when i tell uyou i know what a living hell every single moment can be trust me i know!if you ever wanna talk in a bad moment you can pm me but just know that ive been in moments to where i wanted to just DIE and i can help you through them please dont hesitate if you wanna talk to someone who is in (relatively) the same situation..
im not gonna say life will get better, but know that it CAN get better.
<3

-former-Psychiatric Ward & Help and Advice Moderator
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Old January 18th, 2007, 08:33 PM   #26
Bobby
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Default Re: Suicide

It's good that he's taking interest in not only your problems, but you as a person. No another girl with problems.

"Only the most deluded of us could doubt the necessity of this war."
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Old January 18th, 2007, 08:40 PM   #27
Bankai15
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Default Re: Suicide

You are a big animal activist right?
If you were to kill yourself. Think of all the animals you could have helped.
If you want to tri studying to be a vet and if you become one you can spend the rest of you life careing for sick and hurt animals.


Hang in there......

JACOB
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Old January 20th, 2007, 08:19 AM   #28
JoshDude
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Default Re: Suicide

Just like what FreedomFighter14 said, you really like animals and hate to see them having their own rights being breached... well you could strive to become a vetenarian and save thousands of animals every year. I have also thought about suicide a while ago, and eventually when everything got better, i thought to myself that i was an absolute asshole for being so selfish. Please dont do it =(.
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Old January 20th, 2007, 08:36 AM   #29
mRojas2000
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Default Re: Suicide

If he wants yo know a lil more about yourself, why don't you make an internet blog, give it to us so there's someone who is gonna read it, write on it everyday you can, and give it to your therapist too... don't make it too much personal, but just talk about how you feel and stuff.

If its that hard for you to talk, why don't ya type

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.
Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.


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