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Old July 21st, 2006, 05:53 AM   #1
MEM1990
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Exclamation I dont know what i am sexualy

I need help very badly i am scared of turning out homosexual. The things that i look at on the internet arent exactly people tho, i like gay furry porn, and i just figured it out, i hav ben denying it for so long, since i was about 12 and i saw some on the internet that my friend showed me, but even if i do look at that stuff and i do fantisize about having sexual contact and love with antromorphic creatures that are male then does that make me gay? I mean i would never have sex with a guy in real life because it would just be weird, maybe a blowjob i would take but that would still be weird, when i masturbate i do not watch gay porno because it is gross to me(sorry if i offend:/), but i watch a guy and a girl but i find myself looking that the males genitalia more than the womans, but i do not find mens bodys "hot" or "attractive" sexualy but with yiff(furry porn) i find the males muscles/tone bodys attractive, in RL i find women attractive but not really sexual just a kinda thing were i say wow she is sexy/hot and would choose a woman to be in a relationship with but not a guy.

I really need to figure myself out and i am soo scared right now, i am shaking all over, my whole body feels weird(which started when i read a gay sexual story about furries 2 days ago), i am having cold sweats and this is the most nervous that i have ever been in my entire life, i cried my self to sleep last night while asking "why why why?" i can barley type this because my hands are shaking and i do not want to be a homosexual or bysexual i would be rejected no matter where i went and i dont like gay people you know with the lisps and all, my family would reject me and look at me weird(mentally). I am hoping that this is just a fetish, i would like someone to know what they think i should do or what they think of me or just give advice, thank you.

P.S. I know that i am not old enough to look at pornography, but then again what 16 year old with internet in their room doesnt watch it?
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Old July 21st, 2006, 10:50 AM   #2
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

But if im gay i dont want to be, what if i start getting attracted to my friends that would suck because i like to have guys as just friends, i am home schooled and i only have one friend and i have been through to much crap in my teen years so fer: Major Depression; Social Anxiety; Family problems; boarding schools and after all this crap i try to keep myself in a good frame of mind ive been on 40mg of paxel everyday for months now and then i read a story and i am as bad as i was 2 years ago, i went to the florida sheriffs boys ranch for a while so i have lost all my friends that i grew up around and only have one new one, i have no sexual desires for him at all and never have for any guy except for one and i was like 12 and the kid told me that it was alright to mastubate in the same room so i did and i was curious to see what his was like but i know that was all experimentation, hopefully but he made me think it was a striaght thing to do like he said "o you must be gay because your to shy to do it" i would give anything right now to wipe him from my brain like i never knew him it didnt help me much when my sister found out and then started calling me gay, i just dont know what to do... i dont want to be gay and i cant help what i like even if i hate liking it, i dont want to have to hide in a closet my whole life if i am homosexual because i would hide and i would be a hermit for the rest of my life, my dad has already abandened me and my siblings, i bet he never even thinks about us. I just need to see a phycoligist or som1 to help me from going insane and end up hurting myself i used to be suicidal and i feel that i am once again becoming that, i am not an emo kid as they call it like i used to be i am starting to feel the same way i used to though like when i was. I am at the end of this message and i realize that everything i said was completly random and doesnt make sense and i dont know why i am typing it, i guess i just want someone to help me i want to get everything off my chest to someone and i feel alone with this because if i tell anyone how i feel i will be outcasted and looked down upon.
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Old July 21st, 2006, 01:53 PM   #3
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Ok, now just like Ant said, please calm down.

Now, before I go further, I will introduce myself.
My name is Donnie I am a proud gay teen that came out at age 12. This is more common to come out so soon now-a-days. I usually work with curious guys on VirtualTeen and answer any type of question, whether it be physical or emotional. I do this alot.

Now, if you want, I can talk to you through an Instant Messenger. This'll make the prossess go faster, but also listen to what other people have to say, everybody will say something different in one or two ways. We can talk about it here or IM/PM. I would love to chat, may I ask your name?

Also, I cannot chat right now, as my high-speed internet is down and my MSN messenger is acting up, plus my mom has a problem with her liver and I need to come with her to the grocery store and confort her.

So anyway, again, you can IM/PM me, I'd perfer AIM right now, or we can talk about it on the forums. I am avalible, alot, so please go with whatever you want. And again, what is your name?
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Old July 21st, 2006, 01:56 PM   #4
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

I'm not gay so I might not be much help, but there is nothing wrong with being curious. You should be proud of whatever sexuality you are. Anyone who is mean to you because of your sexuality, well they aren't good people

"Only the most deluded of us could doubt the necessity of this war."
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Old July 21st, 2006, 04:35 PM   #5
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
i am scared of turning out homosexual.
do not be scared. being gay today isnt as bad as it used to be, i find most people really actually couldnt care less. but only you know if you are gay, you just have to look in your heart of hearts, and that will tell you.
but remember just be proud of who you are, because you only get one life, no point doing something you wont enjoy. so screw everyone else, enjoy your life, its too short not to.

~ A L E X ~

||||||||||||
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Old July 21st, 2006, 04:52 PM   #6
MEM1990
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

its not that i am curious but i watch porn and i get off to the male mostly and it scares me because i do not want to be gay and would deny it till the day that i die, ive always had low self esteem and i think this is why... i just dont know what to think of my self i feel sick to my stomach and extremely depressed i wish i could lay down and fall asleep for a week straight i dont want to be in this world with all these emotions its to much. Lets say i turn out gay... i would not be able to be emotional with another guy i just cant its to weird so i would be alone for my whole life. I think i am just sick in the head, because the thing that i am most ashamed about is that i like beastiality which when i think about is kinda gross but when i see it well thats another story. I dont get it why is it that if i hate/dislike something my sexual drive says other?!?!?! Is there anything that i could take to kinda steer my mind into liking girls more i dont want to like guys later on, i know im not gay now but what about a year from now, i could be completly gay as of right now i dont think i have a sexual orientation because i am not interested in dating either sex/having sexual contact.

My name is Mark
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Old July 21st, 2006, 04:59 PM   #7
MEM1990
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by redcar
do not be scared.
Of being gay? I cant I dont want to there is no way in hell I would ever accept it in my mind as well as others. I would be rejected from society, here in Florida I have not come across one gay/bysexual male only females, its just so looked down on here and I do not want to be one that is so outcast.
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Old July 21st, 2006, 05:19 PM   #8
MoveAlong
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
My name is Mark
Hello Mark

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
i would not be able to be emotional with another guy i just cant its to weird so i would be alone for my whole life.
If you are gay, you should hide it, and then move somewhere that people are more trusting. Alot of people stay in the closet for a long time, which is hard but sometimes nessicary.

Let's not talk about bestiality right now, let's stay on the gay topic

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
I dont get it why is it that if i hate/dislike something my sexual drive says other?!?!?!
Are you aroused by the mans genitals, but do not want to have sex with a man? I'm gay. I would NEVER want to have sex with a woman. But, I did happen to turn to a free porn channel, and I saw some lesbian porn. I get sexually aroused by lesbian porn. But, I do NOT want to have sex with a woman. People get aroused by just sex. It's something that's proggramed into our minds, either sexual preference. So, you SHOULD NOT worry this much, just do something to change the mood. Go outside! Do something nice! Ice cream, just do something to calm down. As always, I am avalible to talk to, even if we don't come across the subject of gay issues.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
Is there anything that i could take to kinda steer my mind into liking girls more i dont want to like guys later on, i know im not gay now but what about a year from now, i could be completly gay as of right now i dont think i have a sexual orientation because i am not interested in dating either sex/having sexual contact.
Now, maybe you're just not exited sexually much right now. There is probably nothing, try lesbian pornography But you really shouldn't worry, it'll be fine! Remember, do DO NOT become gay. You just might have not unlocked ANY sexual preference right now. It will come, as for everybody


Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
Of being gay? I cant I dont want to there is no way in hell I would ever accept it in my mind as well as others. I would be rejected from society, here in Florida I have not come across one gay/bysexual male only females, its just so looked down on here and I do not want to be one that is so outcast.
No. There is by far, DEFINATLY gay people in Florida. We are all around you, just like normal people. Because we ARE normal people! We just like somebody different. That isn't a crime.

...But some people think it is. Now, everybody on VT and everybody in the world knows somebody gay. They might not know they're gay, but they know someone, at least. So, they're just hiding. But they shouldn't have to hide. If you are gay, you can hide like them. It might be hard, but it happens every day. Now, when you notice you are gay, you don't ever have to come out if you still live in your parents household.

And you might accept yourself, after finding a nice partner who loves you and accepts you. And if you can accept them, it'll work out like gold.
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Old July 21st, 2006, 05:40 PM   #9
MEM1990
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Lets see:
Sexual Intercourse:
A. Lesbian: Sometimes
B. Gay: No
C. Hetero: Yes
D. Bi: No

Male Masturbation: Yes
Female Masturbation: Yes
a. Gay: No
b. Hetero: Yes

Furry: Yes
a. Gay: Yes
b. Hetero: Yes
c. Bi: Yes

Anal: Yuck
a. Male: No
b. Female: No
________________

What do you guys think i might turn out to be later on by my likes and dislikes
I need to know as a straight forward answer, will i be gay or by? Yes? or No?

Last edited by MEM1990; July 21st, 2006 at 07:55 PM. Reason: Emphisize
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Old July 21st, 2006, 05:52 PM   #10
MoveAlong
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

I don't understand the survey Can you enphizise on some of it?
Spelled B-I bi
There is no 'will', being gay isn't something you become. It's something you are. I don't know much about bestiality, but you can avoid animal porn and stuff like that. It might blot it out of your mind.
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Old July 21st, 2006, 09:09 PM   #11
.hack//zero
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by Apocalyptic_Storm
Are you aroused by the mans genitals, but do not want to have sex with a man? I'm gay. I would NEVER want to have sex with a woman. But, I did happen to turn to a free porn channel, and I saw some lesbian porn. I get sexually aroused by lesbian porn. But, I do NOT want to have sex with a woman. People get aroused by just sex. It's something that's proggramed into our minds, either sexual preference. So, you SHOULD NOT worry this much, just do something to change the mood. Go outside! Do something nice! Ice cream, just do something to calm down. As always, I am avalible to talk to, even if we don't come across the subject of gay issues.
What signs should we look for something like this? If you said that being gay isn't something that you can become, and it's just something that you are. So, what would you say about someone that's liked girls since 1st grade, and having sex with girls sounds like fun. I'm starting to ramble now I guess. Shouldn't be as simple as something like this? This is as it applys to me.

Sex with girls sounds like fun to me.
Sex with men doesn't.

Last edited by .hack//zero; July 21st, 2006 at 09:14 PM.
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Old July 21st, 2006, 11:23 PM   #12
MoveAlong
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Then you're not turned on by men. To fully be gay, you must love a man, and love a mans body in my opinion. The first sign of being gay (again in my opinion), is at teenager years. Not being strongly attracted to a womans body but a mans.

In fact, all my life I've found men and boys more 'intresting' than girls ever were. All girls were always my friends, never my girlfriends. However, I have had one or two crushes on my teachers (women). But, I turned out gay, and I really enjoy being gay. The one time you can accept yourself, is the time that you will find happyness.
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 12:37 AM   #13
.hack//zero
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by Apocalyptic_Storm
Then you're not turned on by men. To fully be gay, you must love a man, and love a mans body in my opinion. The first sign of being gay (again in my opinion), is at teenager years. Not being strongly attracted to a womans body but a mans.

In fact, all my life I've found men and boys more 'intresting' than girls ever were. All girls were always my friends, never my girlfriends. However, I have had one or two crushes on my teachers (women). But, I turned out gay, and I really enjoy being gay. The one time you can accept yourself, is the time that you will find happyness.
Then, I'm not gay. Since I like girl bodys. Okay, that sound wrong, but hopefully you get what I mean.

Last edited by .hack//zero; July 22nd, 2006 at 12:43 AM.
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 03:56 AM   #14
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Thumbs up Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990
Lets see:
Sexual Intercourse:
A. Lesbian: Sometimes
B. Gay: No
C. Hetero: Yes
D. Bi: No

Male Masturbation: Yes
Female Masturbation: Yes
a. Gay: No
b. Hetero: Yes

Furry: Yes
a. Gay: Yes
b. Hetero: Yes
c. Bi: Yes

Anal: Yuck
a. Male: No
b. Female: No
________________

What do you guys think i might turn out to be later on by my likes and dislikes
I need to know as a straight forward answer, will i be gay or by? Yes? or No?
Again it is spelled b and i bi And, I'm still not sure what you mean. What is 'furry'?
I can still tell that you are not gay. If you like to watch the mans genitalia during porn, but do not like men in real life, then that means you won't turn out gay, because sexual preference is outside of the monitor!

Quote:
Originally Posted by .hack//zero
Then, I'm not gay. Since I like girl bodys. Okay, that sound wrong, but hopefully you get what I mean.
That isn't just it though, but to have a strong relationship one must enjoy sex, right? That's why I think you should first be attracted to the gender, in order to understand what your preference is.


...of course, everybody, you might turn out to be gay bi or straight, because you might not be developed enough sexually and emotionally to really understand. Maybe you don't know you like guys, or haven't realised it yet. That's why, you should NOT worry about it. This will solve the biggest problem
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 10:11 AM   #15
MEM1990
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

My mother has taken a class in phycoligy and when she asked me what was wrong today, i had to get it out and i showed her this post, she is the most understanding kind hearted person that i have ever met, she told me that all the feelings i have are normal, she even told me that she isnt really attracted to guys sexually as in if she were to see a naked man, she would not be turned on, and she has been married twice and had three children and is in love with her husband, she said just because i am not sexually attracted to girls doesnt mean i wont develop that later on anyway we talked foe about an hour and a half and i am not scared of who i will become, if i turn out to be gay or even >Bi< then that doesnt bother me now. I now realize that all along i have been scared because of simple close minded stereo types that eeryone thinks that a man or a woman should fit into, and i despise stereo types because i am stereotyped as a "Goth" because i like to wer black clothing, and i am looked down upon by the popular, social people. Thank you guys so very much my head actually feels clear for one time and i feel like such a better person, you guys changed my life within a couple of days, bravo, you guys are good . Again thank you, if i ever have anymore problems later on expect me to be back here in this forum.

By the way furry is art drawn by people of anthromorpic(animals/mythical creatures with human like characteristics) creatures, this all started when i read a gay love story between two male elites from a game on xbox called Halo, elites are a type of alien that i am sexually attracted to. The furry i like is more called scaley because i like dragons and other reptilians but i am still caled a furry because mostly those within the furry community call it scaley.

Anyway thank you guys very much you help people and i think it is amazing what you guys do here, good job -.o i am still not sure about myself completly but like on of you said only time will tell. Goodbye people
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 10:24 AM   #16
.hack//zero
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Well, that's one person cured of his worries. As for me, I'm not worried about what other people think if I am. It's more that I don't wanna be, and my religion says it's wrong. Actually it's kinda funny. To me, it seemed like he has a higher chance of being gay than me.
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 04:18 PM   #17
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Mark, I'm glad that she took it so well I'm glad you feel better.
.hack//zero, That's good Although, him being more gay than you, is right XD j/k
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Old July 22nd, 2006, 04:19 PM   #18
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

It's not a chance of being gay.. it's something that's just there... it's unpredictable in who will turn out to be gay.

"Only the most deluded of us could doubt the necessity of this war."
-John McCain
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Old July 24th, 2006, 07:05 AM   #19
MEM1990
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

As i said i am still a little confused but later that day after i posted i went to the movies and saw pirates of the carrabian 2, i came home while noticing that i was still feeling scared and confused, so to try to solve it i watched some gay porn, i kinda liked it, i think just because i like gay porn or male genitles doesnt mean that i am gay, i know that i have been extremly fond of a girl but not of a guy(she was to old :'( ). So i think that i am Bi... and i do not really have a problem with that, i think that i could be emotionally attracted to a guy but i dont think it would be as satifying to me than a girl, i think that im more on the straight side of bi but i still kinda like guys that are fit you know like abs and pecks but it doesnt mean i wanna have sex with them just that i admire the way they look.
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Old September 22nd, 2006, 09:43 PM   #20
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Default Re: I dont know what i am sexualy

Quote:
Originally Posted by MEM1990 View Post
I need help very badly i am scared of turning out homosexual. The things that i look at on the internet arent exactly people tho, i like gay furry porn, and i just figured it out, i hav ben denying it for so long, since i was about 12 and i saw some on the internet that my friend showed me, but even if i do look at that stuff and i do fantisize about having sexual contact and love with antromorphic creatures that are male then does that make me gay? I mean i would never have sex with a guy in real life because it would just be weird, maybe a blowjob i would take but that would still be weird, when i masturbate i do not watch gay porno because it is gross to me(sorry if i offend:/), but i watch a guy and a girl but i find myself looking that the males genitalia more than the womans, but i do not find mens bodys "hot" or "attractive" sexualy but with yiff(furry porn) i find the males muscles/tone bodys attractive, in RL i find women attractive but not really sexual just a kinda thing were i say wow she is sexy/hot and would choose a woman to be in a relationship with but not a guy.

I really need to figure myself out and i am soo scared right now, i am shaking all over, my whole body feels weird(which started when i read a gay sexual story about furries 2 days ago), i am having cold sweats and this is the most nervous that i have ever been in my entire life, i cried my self to sleep last night while asking "why why why?" i can barley type this because my hands are shaking and i do not want to be a homosexual or bysexual i would be rejected no matter where i went and i dont like gay people you know with the lisps and all, my family would reject me and look at me weird(mentally). I am hoping that this is just a fetish, i would like someone to know what they think i should do or what they think of me or just give advice, thank you.

P.S. I know that i am not old enough to look at pornography, but then again what 16 year old with internet in their room doesnt watch it?

well first of all, with that antromorphic thing i do not know, but i need you to like answer a question, do you LIKE the male genetal thing or just look at it?

if look at theres notin wrong =\ i found myself doing that once too, but when i think about it i dont LIKE it i really like the female much more so its notin really but the antromorphic thing...iono what that means

Quote:
As i said i am still a little confused but later that day after i posted i went to the movies and saw pirates of the carrabian 2, i came home while noticing that i was still feeling scared and confused, so to try to solve it i watched some gay porn, i kinda liked it, i think just because i like gay porn or male genitles doesnt mean that i am gay, i know that i have been extremly fond of a girl but not of a guy(she was to old :'( ). So i think that i am Bi... and i do not really have a problem with that, i think that i could be emotionally attracted to a guy but i dont think it would be as satifying to me than a girl, i think that im more on the straight side of bi but i still kinda like guys that are fit you know like abs and pecks but it doesnt mean i wanna have sex with them just that i admire the way they look.
admiring it isn't gay at all, i do not believe. and its actually a fact that like a LARGE percentage of the people on earth are not 100% straight, no1 is. there may be like 1/100 but no1 is so notin to be worried about, cept the antromorphic thing i have no idea what that is

I'm too cool for a signature xD
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