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Old February 10th, 2014, 08:37 AM   #1741
AlexOnToast
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one :3
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Old February 15th, 2014, 01:21 PM   #1742
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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

(ba-dum-tss)
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Old February 16th, 2014, 04:22 AM   #1743
Seemyheart
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

Quote:
Originally Posted by AlexOnToast View Post
An Irishman walks out of a bar...

(ba-dum-tss)
Haha... that one got me to laugh

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning how to dance in the rain"
"Grab a plate and throw it on the ground. Okay, done. Did it break? Yes. Now say sorry to it. Sorry. Did it go back to the way it was before? No. Do you understand?"
you are amazing, never forget that!
mrpieface2 is the most awesomest, bestest, person in the whole wide world!
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Old February 18th, 2014, 05:41 AM   #1744
AlexOnToast
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Why couldnt the bicycle stand up on its own?
Because it was Two Tyred
(!)
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Old February 18th, 2014, 07:33 AM   #1745
Nick M
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

Quote:
Originally Posted by AlexOnToast View Post
An Irishman walks out of a bar...

(ba-dum-tss)
I can't stop freaking laughing

17
Bi
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Die-hard Miami Heat fan for life.
Old Username: Venom1
Feel free to PM me, I'm open to talk about anything.
My dog, Roxy:
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Old February 23rd, 2014, 01:27 AM   #1746
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what did the knife say to the fork?


lets go spooning
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Old April 21st, 2014, 08:58 AM   #1747
ninja789
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What is the best way to cut wood?

whittle by whittle
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Old April 22nd, 2014, 12:16 PM   #1748
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What do you call a cheap circumcision?

A rip-off!
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Old April 27th, 2014, 12:18 PM   #1749
NotShortButFunsized
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Why can't a nose be twelve inches long?
Because then it'll be a foot!

I'm Chelsea!...19, probably bi, Texas...PM me! I love to make friends and talk about anything
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Old May 4th, 2014, 04:32 PM   #1750
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What do you call a pizza thats being really shady?
Cheesy cx
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Old June 9th, 2014, 02:42 AM   #1751
Microcosm
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Click Here

previously anonymousteen14 & Rainbow Dash.
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Old June 10th, 2014, 10:52 PM   #1752
thatgothgirluknow
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what do u call cheese thats not urs nacho cheese

u know u love the goth girl


do not live to survive but to thrive and secede

<font color=SlateGray><font size=5>BUTTERFLIES</font></font>
the rain comes before the rainbow
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Old July 12th, 2014, 08:00 PM   #1753
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What did the blanket say when it fell of the bed? Oh sheet
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Old July 24th, 2014, 05:10 PM   #1754
conner74
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Why do cows wear bells? 'Cause their horns don't work.

friendly, honest and open
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Old July 26th, 2014, 03:11 PM   #1755
conner74
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What did one wall say to the other wall? Let's, uh, meet up in the corner.

friendly, honest and open
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Old September 1st, 2014, 10:15 PM   #1756
Gamma Male
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex?
Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.

~No really, I love capitalistic markets, I just think we should consider letting the workers seize the means of production.~
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Old September 3rd, 2014, 04:32 PM   #1757
DylPickle
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

Why is six scared of seven?

Because seven is a six offender.
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Old September 3rd, 2014, 04:39 PM   #1758
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

On Sunday, instead of going to church, this man decides to go hunting in an area where a bear has been spotted. While standing near a cliff, he sees the bear sitting nearby. He raises his gun to shoot, but drops the gun, and it falls off the cliff. The bear sees him and begins approaching him. The man gets down on his knees, clasps his hands together and says, "Dear God, make this bear a Christian!" The bear rises up on his back legs, but stops for a moment. The bear looks down at the man and begins, "For this and all we are about to receive..."

(For those who don't get it, the prayer the bear is saying is one that a Christian/Catholic may say before eating a meal.)
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Old September 3rd, 2014, 04:45 PM   #1759
DylPickle
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Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

A guy walks up to a man walking a dog. He asks the man if the dog bites, and the man replies no. The guy starts to pet the dog, and is bitten. He asks the man why the dog bit him. The man replies

"Its not my dog"
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Old September 9th, 2014, 03:42 PM   #1760
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This will be so corny, just to let ya know.
Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing.
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