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Old July 28th, 2018, 10:49 AM   #1
ailleen14
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Default so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

I have three close friends one of which I've been friends with for 11 years. We've always been platonic friends except for the past month I went down on her twice. But neither of us want to do it again though. but now my other friends think we're friends with benefits just in denial. But I actually have no intention of doing it again. In fact I have more interest in guys than I do in any girl including my friend. Does having a sexual encounter with a friend mean you're automatically friends with benefits even if neither of you want to continue being sexually intimate?

Last edited by ailleen14; July 28th, 2018 at 11:47 AM.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 11:22 AM   #2
MackFind
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

No way, just straight up friends who tried something out.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 11:47 AM   #3
Katie2003
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

I agree, sexual experimentation with friends at our ages is very common and only means that both of you were curious. Look on it as a learning experience, not a commitment to continue doing it.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 11:49 AM   #4
MagicGinnySurprise
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Not a bit. It means you hooked up. Different things can come out of a hookup, but one or two encounters doesn't make any kind of a relationship.

Not to mention that insisting on labeling and defining every relationship is pointless and stupid in the first place.

Last edited by MagicGinnySurprise; July 28th, 2018 at 12:05 PM.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 01:37 PM   #5
ailleen14
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MagicGinnySurprise View Post
Not a bit. It means you hooked up. Different things can come out of a hookup, but one or two encounters doesn't make any kind of a relationship.

Not to mention that insisting on labeling and defining every relationship is pointless and stupid in the first place.
Yeah she's in a relationship we were never dating or anything it was just an encounter. I don't see us as anything different from platonic either.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 04:13 PM   #6
Jake445
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

It's was just something fun among friends, nothing life changing or defining. You decided you don't want to continue and that's the end of it. If you think it could be a problem with your other friend you should openly and directly talk about what happened and clear it up.

Fourteen, Twin.
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Old July 28th, 2018, 07:36 PM   #7
ska8er
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

U were curious and u tried
something so forget what
other people say.
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Old July 30th, 2018, 10:37 AM   #8
ailleen14
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jake445 View Post
It's was just something fun among friends, nothing life changing or defining. You decided you don't want to continue and that's the end of it. If you think it could be a problem with your other friend you should openly and directly talk about what happened and clear it up.
They know everything that happened especially the first time they know it wasn't planned we weren't dating and that she has a bf now. They know I like guys and don't really like girls. They know all that somehow they think we're friends with benefits because we crossed that line once I guess.
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Old July 30th, 2018, 04:08 PM   #9
Jake445
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ailleen14 View Post
They know everything that happened especially the first time they know it wasn't planned we weren't dating and that she has a bf now. They know I like guys and don't really like girls. They know all that somehow they think we're friends with benefits because we crossed that line once I guess.
So if they know all that are you sure that they are being entirely genuine with you? Although it does sound like they aren't just having a bit of fun with you. Still, you should tell them that it bothers you that they say it!

Fourteen, Twin.
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Old July 30th, 2018, 06:28 PM   #10
SpaceyCayce
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

I wouldn't consider someone "friends with benefits" if it wasn't a current and ongoing thing. It sounds like just friends to me, and your other friends are not very open to the idea that things can come and go like that. It seems they are just trying to shape things the way they want (maybe for the sake of drama?)

Relationships and situations change. For example, if I had a boyfriend/girlfriend and we broke up...they wouldn't always be who I was dating

ĒUnder all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. Silence is as deep as eternity, speech as shallow as time.Ē - Thomas Carlyle

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Old July 30th, 2018, 06:36 PM   #11
Shamal
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

If there are no benefits, you're just friends.

bi - 17 - open to chat about anything
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Old August 4th, 2018, 11:50 PM   #12
Taylormade
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Trying something a couple of times and then quitting doesn't mean friends with benefits as far as I'm concerned. If it did, you'd be labelled for everything you ever do, no matter how quick and fleeting. You are what you are in the present moment; the past is in the past.
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Old August 6th, 2018, 11:12 AM   #13
Sofiya02
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

no i don’t think you’re fwb. It’s just a one night stand, or maybe two night stand in your case. don’t worry about what others think. fwb would regularly have sex for fun. it’s not your case.

Open minded, bisexual, sporty, nudist girl Sofiya!
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Old August 10th, 2018, 05:33 PM   #14
Falcons_11
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sofiya02 View Post
no i donít think youíre fwb. Itís just a one night stand, or maybe two night stand in your case. donít worry about what others think. fwb would regularly have sex for fun. itís not your case.
I think that Sofiya is spot on with her post about FWB. Just having one or two sexual encounters with friends, even very close friends, doesn't constitute FWBs.
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Old September 30th, 2018, 01:43 PM   #15
Jordan99
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Default Re: so am I friends with benefits if we don't plan on doing it ever again?

One or two experiences don't define you. You experimented and decided it wasn't for you and now you're still friends. That's wonderful. Don't get hung up on labels.
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