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Old March 17th, 2018, 11:34 PM   #1
nerdysoccergirl
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Unhappy My dad wants it more than I do.

Hey,

I need your help guys. i've been playing soccer ever since I was very little, 4 or 5, I am older and doing my last year of high school. My dad has always been the awesome parent who pushed me to do better, to be better. He's always wanted me to play some university soccer, wanted it more than I do. But I realized one year ago that I enjoyed playing the game without having to play in university to be happy. But my dad has always had the idea that I was made to play on a top university team, but I don't feel the same way. I like the game and want to play for the rest of my life, but not in that way. I don't feel that by playing on a university team will make me happier. I have done several I.D camp or showcases for universities, but I feel more stressed than anything when doing them and I don't feel that much happy you know? I fear that if I tell my dad the truth that he won't care about me in sports anymore. He won't come and encourage me, which makes me sad, because I like when he comes. So I told him today and he got pretty pished and told me that I should have told him earlier and that he would have stopped paying for all my soccer and said that university will be very expensive without receiving any help from him if I don't play soccer etc. I don't know what to do, I feel more happy when I play without a worry, for fun to win, but not to be the next messi. I want to continue to play to be active, to be competitive, to make new friends and to find a healthy way to express my stress out of school. But with my dad around and the way he tries to push me and always talk about playing at university etc. I find myself more stressed than anything else and not happy. I have good grades and will go to university for sure btw. Its just the soccer part with my dad that bothers me. What should I do?
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Old March 17th, 2018, 11:47 PM   #2
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

show him your post in this thread





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Old March 18th, 2018, 02:30 AM   #3
Tim the Enchanter
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

Ah it's basically the same with my dad in the sense that he always wants me to be really good and get on the good teams and stuff with baseball. Only difference is I'm not in high school yet and it's not soccer but baseball for me.


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Old March 20th, 2018, 03:31 AM   #4
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

I'm going to urge you to reconsider. If you can get a scholarship for your talent I believe that you should do it. I guarantee you that even though there are stressful moments, it is a better way to pay for your education than working other low paying jobs. Maybe you shouldn't look at is as a hobby, but as a job.

If there is not scholarship involved and its just about the enjoyment I don't think that you should play.


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Old March 20th, 2018, 09:35 AM   #5
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by NewLeafsFan View Post
I'm going to urge you to reconsider. If you can get a scholarship for your talent I believe that you should do it. I guarantee you that even though there are stressful moments, it is a better way to pay for your education than working other low paying jobs. Maybe you shouldn't look at is as a hobby, but as a job.

If there is not scholarship involved and its just about the enjoyment I don't think that you should play.
Soccer seems like it is something you are really good at and should continue to pursue. Your father probably knows what is best for you in this situation. If you continue to play at the high levels of competition, you will always have to worry about pressure and success. If this is something you'd like to play professionally, you should not give up with it. If you really hate it, then you shouldn't force yourself to continue playing w/ university. If you have different life goals, maybe focusing on school and grades is a better path to go on but make sure that you have a good path to follow.




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Old March 26th, 2018, 08:15 PM   #6
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

A lot of parents like to live through their children's sports. They go beyond just being supportive and giving pointers. They push hard for perfection and advancement. I feel so for you that you can't just play and enjoy yourself. It looks like he is even trying to kind of blackmail you into playing college ball. It should be your choice with his support either way. I don't know just what to tell you to do about this. You just need to just keep talking to him about your feelings in hopes that he will understand how you feel. Good luck.

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Old March 27th, 2018, 06:16 AM   #7
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

You can either play football which you are good at, or you can be like me, slaving away hours for shitty pay to pay for my future education.

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Old March 30th, 2018, 02:40 PM   #8
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

if your heart isnt in it then it isn't worth pursuing because ultimately you wont do well (or you might) but just spinning your wheels. You will resent the fact.
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Old March 30th, 2018, 04:06 PM   #9
Just JT
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

You should do whats good for you underthe circumstances that are good for you also. And Dad should be ok with that. But I agree with him you shoulda said something earlier. Especially if he spent a ton of cash for all this

But also, if looking at a scholarship, thats not something Id walk away from either. Thats like work.....well be working for the feast of our lives bro so...

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Old March 31st, 2018, 02:32 PM   #10
imanopenbook
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Default Re: My dad wants it more than I do.

Here's my thoughts on this. University is really expensive and if you can get any help paying for that then do it. If that means playing soccer for your school then do it. If you like playing the game and you say you do then it should be fun and you will meet a lot of people being on the school team.

If you don't like playing soccer for the team then I think you should still do it and think of it more like a job then to help pay for school. Not everybody is good enough to make a school team and would love to be on one so you're lucky that you're good enough
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