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Old January 15th, 2017, 11:48 AM   #761
Flapjack
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

My first time was ages ago, can't remember exactly when but it was more than 6 years ago as I remember my parents were still together then.


I'm a prettyyy awkward weeb that likes alcohol and punk rock :')
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Old February 20th, 2017, 04:28 PM   #762
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well spoken!
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Old July 5th, 2017, 10:10 AM   #763
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The first time I cut was a few weeks ago. It realized that it was so fun and possibly addicting that I never did it again. I get urges all the time but I try to fight them off by distracting myself.
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Old July 14th, 2017, 01:28 AM   #764
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Deleted for private reasons

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Old July 16th, 2017, 09:29 AM   #765
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

I don't know anyone on this thread, but all of you with life issues are a son, daughter, brother, sister or friend of many who care deeply about you. Make a call to an anonymous helpline - learn the skills to talk it out - allow yourself to be loved.
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Old September 11th, 2017, 09:10 PM   #766
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WOW! i have never heard of people doing this before. i don't how a person could do it. just thinking about it makes me woozy.
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Old December 10th, 2017, 06:49 PM   #767
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I was in grade 7. I remember it was the day of a rugby game I was gonna watch with my brother. Went on for five years until year 11.
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Old December 10th, 2017, 07:49 PM   #768
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I never cut but did other stuff.

14 year old girl from Massachusetts. Feel free to message me or email me about anything!
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Old December 14th, 2017, 09:41 PM   #769
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

When was the first time you cut yourself? I had just turned 12, if I'm remembering right.
What did it feel like the first time you cut yourself? This might sound really stupid but it hurt. It really fucking hurt. It hurt enough that I didn't have to think about all the things that made me want to self harm in the first place. It was like the perfect distraction. For a few minutes I wasn't thinking about the problems in my life, I was just focused on the pain.
What was going through your head at the time? "Ok, here we go, here we go. What if this doesn't work? What if I do this and nothing happens? What if nothing changes. Ok I'm just gonna do it.... Oh wow, oh fuck that hurts, oh my god that hurts so bad holy shit... Wow, that actually worked, i should do this again." and so began an addiction
that would take 2 year to curb.

I was just really thinking about all the problems I faced in my life, and how overwhelming and gigantic they felt.
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Old March 7th, 2018, 07:24 PM   #770
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

The first time I ever actually self harmed was probably in 6th grade. I was anxious about everything, my friends treated me horribly, and I had a bad day. I had heard of self-harm through the internet, that it was supposed to be bad, but it made you feel okay! So I grabbed a pencil and scratched myself a few times with it. It didn't make me feel like anything, and I forgot about it.

The first time I started and continued was probably in July of last year. I was feeling okay, I hadn't talked to my abusive friends in months, and I met someone I really liked (alterously, not romantically) who made me feel like I was actually cared about. He had his own demons, having tried to kill himself and he used to cut. On that day I had first noticed his scars, and when I asked, he had blown me off, and I realized what they were. Also, he was bisexual and HATED talking about it. It made sense, especially since he was bullied for his sexuality when he was younger, and was paranoid his mom was someone going to see the security footage and forbid him from going back. Anyway, I was in a HUGE pride phase, considering I'd started questioning if I was bisexual myself, and I'm still in the pride phase! (Not as intensely though.) I was making a pride flag out of beads and he came over and saw it. He was annoyed and muttered I was "naive" under his breath. I definitely over reacted, but I was just so on edge from constant social abuse that my nerves just exploded. I went into shock (Not medical shock, I was physically fine) and spent the next few hours laying around berating myself and thinking bad things about myself. Then I got up, found a few things, and scratched myself until it scabbed. It took a week to heal, and I was paranoid someone was going to know, but nobody knows about it, even now.

I started self harming on and off. Over the Summer I made a few big scars with a pencil. Only 3. It wasn't a daily thing, I'd do it every few weeks. Then, during school, I found a piece of glass. I used it on and off. Most of my scars are from two times; one I did about 5, the other I scratched myself about 8 times. Then, in November, my parents finally confronted me; turns out, they knew for months, but didn't know how to say anything. They made me give them my piece of glass, and I self-harmed one last time with another, but I pitched it 2 months ago.

Thing is, I didn't find it too hard to stop. I think only once I actually felt good, the other times just made me feel worse. I was in a state where I was absolutely exhausted, so I didn't do it most of the times I wanted to. I found it relieving to quit. Now? I have been about 5 months self-harm free, and it's been better since I quit.
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Old June 2nd, 2018, 05:30 PM   #771
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I do it instead of compulsing (I have OCD) and when I'm angry. It makes me feel numb and that makes me feel better. Feeling numb is better than feeling OCD. I don't actually 'cut' I just scratch sharp object and draw on myself in pen, or pick at my skin until it leaves a mark. My first time (that sounds so stupid, likes it's a good thing) was the other day and I'm 15. I told my therapist a week later (yesterday) because of guilt from OCD. He forced me to tell my mum and turns out she'd already known and had thrown my glass away.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ship2001 View Post
I don't know anyone on this thread, but all of you with life issues are a son, daughter, brother, sister or friend of many who care deeply about you. Make a call to an anonymous helpline - learn the skills to talk it out - allow yourself to be loved.
Cutting isn't about wanting to kill yourself. It's the opposite.

Last edited by Dalcourt; June 2nd, 2018 at 09:52 PM.
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Old June 10th, 2018, 05:02 PM   #772
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Hi all well itís not about me but a met a girl who had a eating disorder and self harmed. I met her on a chat site and got to know her but didnít really know how to deal with it, I used to send her money every week by Western union because she said it would ease her worries then all of a sudden she disappeared and I miss her. I wish I could of helped her more as well as others.
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Old June 11th, 2018, 12:32 AM   #773
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

Iíve never cut, and Iím pretty sure I never will. If thereís anyone out there who does, why did you do it? Whyíd you keep doing it? Is it addicting, like masturbating, but in a lot worse of a way? I just donít understand why, but Iím trying to because I know people who do cut.
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Old October 3rd, 2018, 07:41 PM   #774
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

I have never tried cutting, because it scares me, I usually scratch, pinch, bite, I like to rub an eraser on my forearm, I tried yesterday for the first time to apply a hot object on my skin, I tried just 10 minutes ago to use a stapler in my foot, outch ! But it felt good though

Edit : I finally did it today, It's wierd because it was not even spontaneous, I wanted to do it, I went to go to my dollar store to buy pencil sharpeners. I didn't go deep at all though, it was like scratching myself with a blade. It bbled a little but it was okay, it looked like I fell down on cement...

Last edited by Ouragan; October 3rd, 2018 at 11:57 PM.
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Old October 5th, 2018, 11:10 AM   #775
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

Quote:
Originally Posted by Some Kid View Post
Iíve never cut, and Iím pretty sure I never will. If thereís anyone out there who does, why did you do it? Whyíd you keep doing it? Is it addicting, like masturbating, but in a lot worse of a way? I just donít understand why, but Iím trying to because I know people who do cut.
Basically really addicting.

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Old October 5th, 2018, 03:44 PM   #776
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kieran2001 View Post
Basically really addicting.
How is it addicting?? Doesenít it hurt! Who would want to do that to themselves?
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Old October 6th, 2018, 11:09 PM   #777
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Deleted

Hello, I wish a nice day

Last edited by Ouragan; October 7th, 2018 at 01:22 AM.
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Old October 7th, 2018, 12:32 AM   #778
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How is it addicting?? Doesenít it hurt! Who would want to do that to themselves?
On paper, yes, it should really hurt. But a lot of people report little to no pain. This is because a lot of people will enter a dissociative state where we just zone out. Also, it releases endorphins which block a lot of the pain. Because of the endorphins, it makes people want to do it more and it becomes addictive

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Old October 8th, 2018, 08:03 PM   #779
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bougainvillea View Post
On paper, yes, it should really hurt. But a lot of people report little to no pain. This is because a lot of people will enter a dissociative state where we just zone out. Also, it releases endorphins which block a lot of the pain. Because of the endorphins, it makes people want to do it more and it becomes addictive
Oh, ok. Makes more sense now. Thanks for letting me know. I donít think that someone should ever be in a position where they have to do this to themselves but unfortunately there are some people who just feel they have to. I feel bad for those people.
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Old October 28th, 2018, 04:30 PM   #780
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Default Re: First Time Cutting

I've never cut myself purposefully. If i'm angry or upset i just punch something.
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