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Old June 28th, 2011, 12:05 PM   #1
Aceso
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Default Does it get to a point...

...Where it stops becoming a diet?
I'm 111Ib, 5ft 6. My goal weight is 6 stone.
Even though I know it's bad, I long to be able to see my ribs, and to have skinny legs. I want to be known as the 'skinny one' not the 'curvy' one. I'm sick of people telling me what to do.
But I know it's wrong. I know it's bad, I know I'm bad for thinking this. And I hate it. I hate having to purge, to stop myself eating when others around me can stuff their face with chocolate and stay skinny. It's a struggle for me to keep the weight I am let alone loose.
I've worked out a plan. Loose 1Ib a week by eating only 1,500 calories. If I eat over that, I must exercise it off.
This is fine, but I'm starting to loose control. It's getting to the point where I'm burning 1,000 calories a day, and staying up until the early hours of the morning just to burn off calories. I'm exercising for 1-4 hours a day and I'm still not satisfied, I could still do better. A week or so ago I started a food diary, and made rules for myself and added punishments like cutting where I am fat each time I overeat. Or if it gets to the point where I can't exercise it all off in one go I will purge until I'm dizzy and then cut, and exercise it off over a few days along with more calorie cuts and punishments.
I want it and hate it at the same time. Why can't I look into the mirror like I used to and just be happy with what I see? Why can't my body look like all the other girls who are the same height and weight as me? I must be fat. But everyone says I'm not. So then why does my stomach stick out and my thighs jiggle!?

~
Trying to break free.
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Old June 28th, 2011, 12:52 PM   #2
SWMG
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

Hey, first of all you have to calm down! Now you said you want to look into the mirror and see yourself beautiful happy as you did before. But let me tell you, you ARE BEAUTIFUL and if you dont believe it, it doesnt matter if people around you tell it or not because YOU are the one who has to believe it. What you are doing to your body is not good, the starving, the execive exercise and the missing of nutrition will just alterate how your metabolism works, your skin, and I could continue with the effects of this. Do it for yourself and not for anyone else.
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Old June 28th, 2011, 08:22 PM   #3
kylenike
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

hey how come you want to see your ribs and could i maybe see a pic of you
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Old June 28th, 2011, 11:04 PM   #4
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

...listen. I'm an inch taller than you and I'm 156lbs. I'm much bigger than you. I don't think you need to force yourself not to eat at all. If you'd like to see a fat person, look at me. I can't eat anything unless I monitor it to the extreme, otherwise I gain weight.

I'm sorry, I'm just a little off-put by this. And I'm not in the best mood either .
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Old June 29th, 2011, 01:44 AM   #5
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lethe View Post
...listen. I'm an inch taller than you and I'm 156lbs. I'm much bigger than you. I don't think you need to force yourself not to eat at all. If you'd like to see a fat person, look at me. I can't eat anything unless I monitor it to the extreme, otherwise I gain weight.

I'm sorry, I'm just a little off-put by this. And I'm not in the best mood either .
I know, I really am sorry. It's just I know I need to stop. But my mind is torn, half of me is saying to stop and half of me is telling me to continue. I've dropped from 130Ib to 111Ib, and now I don't feel like I can control it anymore.
I honestly don't mind about about anybody else's bodyweight, it doesn't change who they are. Your BMI is in the normal weight range I should think so please don't put yourself down. I'm sure you are beautiful.


Quote:
Originally Posted by kylenike View Post
hey how come you want to see your ribs and could i maybe see a pic of you
I want to see my ribs because to me its reassurance to know that I'm loosing weight or skinny. I can't quite explain it, but half of my mind just tells me that it's good when I can see my ribs...
What picture do you mean? I'll inbox you.

~
Trying to break free.

Last edited by Aceso; June 29th, 2011 at 01:47 AM.
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Old June 29th, 2011, 02:43 AM   #6
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

You're underweight at this point. If you continue to lose weight you are going to make yourself extremely unhealthy and it's going to be hard for you to recover. You know you need to stop, but you have to make the decision to make yourself healthy. If you continue to lose weight you're going to have an even harder time helping yourself.

Take it from someone who's been overweight since they were 11. I'm 24.4 on the BMI scale, meaning I'm .5 away from being classified as overweight. But the BMI doesn't calculate body fat to muscle ratio, or waistline rato either. Factoring these two in gives me the knowledge that I'm overweight. I'm only an inch taller than you and I'm about 45lbs heavier than you. That's pretty sad.

I would kill to be 111lbs. I'd kill to be 130lbs. I'd even kill to be 140lbs. Because I've never been at a good weight and I've always been fat and big. It makes me sad that I can't lose weight, even with starvation. I'd consider you lucky because you've lost so much weight, but I know it's not healthy...it's just a really hard subject for me. I want to be like you but at the same time I know it's wrong :/.
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Old July 1st, 2011, 03:23 AM   #7
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lethe View Post
...it's just a really hard subject for me. I want to be like you but at the same time I know it's wrong :/.
I couldn't agree with you more, this is often what I feel like too. I'm naturally quite big bones and broad shouldered, with quite wide thighs/hips as well. I hate it and would love to be elegant and slim, slimmer than anyone else. the thinnest. But I know how awful that is and I hate myself for thinking like that.

~
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Old July 1st, 2011, 06:58 AM   #8
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

From your pictures, you're already slim. For goodness sake, you're 45lbs lighter than me! If anyone is slim and elegant, it's you. You don't need to lose any more weight; you're already under your ideal weight. Being too thin won't make you elegant, it will make you look like a skeleton. You need to realize that there needs to be a happy medium; you shouldn't be on either end of the extremes (too heavy or too thin).
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Old January 8th, 2012, 11:13 PM   #9
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

OK, so, this is extremely dangerous to your health, u may think u know tat, but u dont understand, a diet like this will take 20 years off of ur total life span. that is ridiculous, and u should reconsider, especially cutting which is crazy to do. if i were u, i would consider seeing a psychologist, i know because my father is one. good luck

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Old January 9th, 2012, 12:56 PM   #10
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Default Re: Does it get to a point...

Please do not bump old threads

You brought hate, pills and knives,
And this is how the tale begins.
Its your life, exist and wonder why.
When it only fails to work,
It only fails to work sometimes
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