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Old September 14th, 2006, 08:12 PM   #1
itsJustme89
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Exclamation WTF is wrong with me?

I have been very depressed for a while. I'm kinda scared to say why without knowing anyone but here goes.

Well, ever since I was about 12-13 I've been really attracted to other boys, never girls. I really thought I was gay except its been a few years, I'm 17 now and I'm still attracted to 12-13 year old boys. I cant stop it I've tried not to think about it but I still do. What the hell is wrong with me?
Am I a pedophile? I REALLY REALLY DONT WANT TO BE LIKE THIS! Just the thought of being like this for the rest of my life makes me want to KILL MYSELF. I think about SUICIDE everyday, but I guess I don't have the guts to do it. What should I do? My biggest fear is that my parents will find out about me. Help me please I don't know what else to do other than die.

Last edited by itsJustme89; September 14th, 2006 at 08:24 PM.
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Old September 15th, 2006, 04:44 AM   #2
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Well all I can suggest is that you go to a counselor a good one.. And as always suicide is not the answer its more like surrendiring to all your problems

I'm tough, rough, ready and able
To pick myself up from under this table
Don't stick no sign on me, I got no label
I'm a little sick, unsure, unsound and unstable

But I'm fighting my way back
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Old September 15th, 2006, 06:49 AM   #3
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Don't worry... I don't think you are pedophile unless you see child pornography... just take time, maybe go to a counselor, and talk to her about your problem... I don't see whats the problem of not telling your parents...

OHH BTW!!! I met this couple, where the women was 17 years OLDER than the man... so... lol no problem, i thinK!!!
Edit: obviously they were old adults, lol

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.
Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.


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Last edited by mRojas2000; September 15th, 2006 at 08:05 AM.
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Old September 17th, 2006, 01:31 PM   #4
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

I have looked at porn before. And how can I talk to a counselor they'll just tell my parents and then my parents will think I'm some kind of freak. I know what it means to be like this my parents both think that pedos dont deserve to live and should burn in hell and so do I. So I'm left with only one other choice and that is I should kill myself.
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Old September 17th, 2006, 02:33 PM   #5
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

fist off, 6425, even if he wants attention, no need to curse at him... hes just having problems, and seeking help...
Ok, you dont have to worry, lol. Don't kill yourself just because you like people who is 4 years younger than you! If you think its the answer, go ahead, but its just stupid, and you are going to hurt alot of people! you are not pedophile, since you're still a teenager.
Just still with life, and seek for help. Tell your problem to a councelor, THEY HELP!! you are mature enough, and he/she won't tell your parents! It's not hurting anyone yet, and they will just try to make you a therapy, or just try to figure out why you like 13 year olds, and look for something that helps...


Miguel

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Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.


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Last edited by mRojas2000; September 18th, 2006 at 07:42 AM.
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Old September 18th, 2006, 07:40 AM   #6
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oh whoo.... oops...
lol, ill edit that...
never got he was gay :S

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris.
Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.


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Old September 18th, 2006, 03:59 PM   #7
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by '6425' View Post
Its not a girl its a guy. And quite frankly it sickens me.
It sickens me too but who can I talk to ? How do I find them?
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Old September 18th, 2006, 08:00 PM   #8
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

talk to your schools councler about getting references to therapy, if they ask why jsut say its personal.
and i think its very brave of you for admitting it, and i DONT think your a phedophile becuase you've admitted you know its wrong and you want help.
bravo.

W a r n i n g: Too Many Thoughts Could Lead To An Explosion.


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Old September 20th, 2006, 08:34 PM   #9
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Unhappy Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Thanx I will try that but I'm not sure I will be able to talk to someone face to face about it. I've read a lot of stuff online and they says theres no cure for my problem basically I'm stuck like this forever which makes me even more depressed All I want is to be str8 and this is just killing me.

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Old September 22nd, 2006, 09:36 PM   #10
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by itsJustme89 View Post
I have looked at porn before. And how can I talk to a counselor they'll just tell my parents and then my parents will think I'm some kind of freak. I know what it means to be like this my parents both think that pedos dont deserve to live and should burn in hell and so do I. So I'm left with only one other choice and that is I should kill myself.

well 1st of all, doesn't matter who you are what the problem is, killing yourself is NEVER the answer. even if you think it sucks, life's too good to get rid of, even if you dont believe so. this is something you only have once and will NEVER get back if you destroy it. you will not go to hell for being a pedo, live your life, and when you die you wont have any threat of being in hell think of it that way, but trust me, if you kill yourself, you'll solve NOTHING, you'll bring more misery, cuz right before you do it you'll regret it and it may be too late. dont throw away your life because of a problem. i'm not a completely holy person or anything, but when you live your life no matter how bad it gets god will accept you and you will live happily for eternity in heaven k? just think of it like that

I'm too cool for a signature xD
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Old September 23rd, 2006, 11:18 PM   #11
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

You're not crazy, nor are you a pedophile.

A lot of people think about crazy shit, but to be honest, as long as you don't actually look at illegal pornography, or have sex with young boys, it doesn't matter if you think about it, because thinking isn't against the law.

However, you still shouldn't be thinking about doing it. Although it may be a very touchy thing to talk about with someone, but that's the best thing to do. If you are really embarassed, another thing to try is to go out with guys your age, and see how that goes.

If you do see a psychologist, assure the psychologist that you will *NOT* try to molest anyone, because they are legally supposed to alert authorities of you are going to harm yourself or anyone else. Assure your counselor that it's merely a strange thought that you want to solve before it causes problems.

I hope I am some help to you.

Edit: Mixed up words. Sorry, 6425.

My toes are cold.

Last edited by My_Toes_Are_Cold; September 23rd, 2006 at 11:38 PM.
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Old September 23rd, 2006, 11:21 PM   #12
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did you mean SHOULDNT be ashamed?

I'm too cool for a signature xD
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Old September 23rd, 2006, 11:49 PM   #13
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Look I know I wouldnt ever do anything illegal and I know that thinking about it isnt illegal but I still thiink is wrong to think about it. I dont want to think about it at all but I still do. Im not even interested in guys my own age. I just want these thoughts to go away forever and theres only one way that will work
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Old September 24th, 2006, 10:15 AM   #14
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

As said before, suicide is not the answer. Problems can lay within your brain, and talking to a professional could help root out and solve the problem. From having a psychologist and having REALLY weird thoughts myself, they really do help.

My toes are cold.
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Old September 24th, 2006, 10:45 AM   #15
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

just dont do it
the only advice that i have is dont do it and meet someone your one age of the opposite sex
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Old September 25th, 2006, 02:33 PM   #16
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by itsJustme89 View Post
Look I know I wouldnt ever do anything illegal and I know that thinking about it isnt illegal but I still thiink is wrong to think about it. I dont want to think about it at all but I still do. Im not even interested in guys my own age. I just want these thoughts to go away forever and theres only one way that will work
trust me man, suicide is NOT the answer, never will be, just live a life of torment and an eternity in peace you gotta think of that

if you believe in god iono what religion you are, but if you do and you die you will go to heaven and live by god, who can solve the problem

if you do not believe in god or whatever religion you are, there must be something in the afterlife that'll fix the problem, not suicide tho, trust me suicide isn't the way to go

I'm too cool for a signature xD
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Old September 26th, 2006, 03:21 PM   #17
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

I strongly advise that you dont kill yourself, i know that you might think that you are protecting people by doing this and saving them from pain but think about the people who care about you, imagine what it would do to them.
What i would do is go see a councilor and she will find the source of the problem and help you. In the mean time try and stay strong and try avoiding these thourghts by keeping busy and try not to masturbate as it is 'feeding the fuel that you need for the fire'.

Best of luck to you, you have done the hard part more or less but it aint going to be easy.
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Old October 13th, 2008, 02:38 PM   #18
itsJustme89
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

just a follow up:

its been 2 years since i made this thread, and I still find myself attracted to younger boys

i had to be put in a mental hospital for about a month because I tried to kill myself, now I am on medication and i meet with a therapist every week

the medication helps, but i still feel attracted to boys and sometimes I still feel like I should die because I will always be this way
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Old October 24th, 2008, 10:31 AM   #19
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please, dont kill yourself. its not the anser, onestly. do you talk about your feelings to your therapist? if so what do they think?
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Old October 24th, 2008, 10:36 AM   #20
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Default Re: WTF is wrong with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by itsJustme89 View Post
just a follow up:

its been 2 years since i made this thread, and I still find myself attracted to younger boys

i had to be put in a mental hospital for about a month because I tried to kill myself, now I am on medication and i meet with a therapist every week

the medication helps, but i still feel attracted to boys and sometimes I still feel like I should die because I will always be this way
That deserves a new thread, bumping this one is just.. meh.

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