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Old November 5th, 2009, 05:31 AM   #1
Gumleaf
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Name: Stephen
Join Date: February 17, 2007
Location: Sydney
Age: 23
Gender: Male
Blog Entries: 75
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this stupid negative thinking and zero self esteem is killing me. my mind has me placed so low that i may as well be dead. i feel like i am not good enough for anyone at all. i try my hardest to help myself, but i feel like i'm being drawn in like a magnet. constant crying, constant loneliness and constant unhappiness makes me feel like i have absoutely no purpose at all and the whole world would be better off without me. i have the most wondeful girlfriend ever, but i feel bad. she shouldn't be with me, she could do so much better. everyone who is connected to me could do so much better. i feel like i'm absolutely nothing. i hate myself, even though i try not to. i'm just an epic failure. things will never change!!!

stephen

Always Hawthorn

Hawthorn Football Club

Strong As One

~Laura was here~
~Jessi should have been here~
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Old November 5th, 2009, 05:41 AM   #2
nick
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Name: Nick
Join Date: January 27, 2009
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Age: 24
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Stephen, I dont really know you very well, but to me you are one of the most respected people here on vt. You use your position wisely and fairly and I dont remember ever seeing a bad post from you. You also have an amazing sense of humour. I dont see those things as epic failure or of no worth. I guess that doesnt seem worth so much "In the real world", but round here other people, me included, hold you in very high esteem.
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Old November 5th, 2009, 07:29 AM   #3
Sapphire
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Stephen, maybe now you will look more seriously at this:
http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfm

I'm sorry to see that you are still struggling. But approaching your counsellor with the self esteem and depression sections to work through together from the website I've given you will help immensely.


~ The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step ~

* Nothing in the world has ever been accomplished without passion *
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Old November 5th, 2009, 12:47 PM   #4
theOperaGhost
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Stephen, you really do need to get help...and you need to open up to people in real life, not just people online. You are not a failure at all. You are a wonderful person and everyone around you knows that.
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Old November 6th, 2009, 11:20 AM   #5
NightFighter
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Join Date: April 14, 2009
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I dont think anyone with 90 rep power could ever say they are a failure.
It is evident that you have helped a lot of lives to people you dont even know! You should be extremely proud of yourself.
You are being too critical of yourself. You girlfriend is with you for a reason. A lot of people in love feel that their partner could do better. Im positive if you ask her she will disagree with your statement.
Maybe it is time to seek professional help. Dont you want to do anything to live life the way it should be? You dont have to live like this. Professional help could be the key to turning your life around. Go for it. If it doesnt work out then atleast you have tried.

Finally,

Things Will Change!

You wont bear these feelings forever. You will be happy one day. You just need to ask for help. You have given helpful advice to so many people, its time to receive some now.

"But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?"
- Mark Twain

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Old November 6th, 2009, 01:16 PM   #6
daveywavey
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Age: 24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gumleaf View Post
this stupid negative thinking and zero self esteem is killing me. my mind has me placed so low that i may as well be dead. i feel like i am not good enough for anyone at all. i try my hardest to help myself, but i feel like i'm being drawn in like a magnet. constant crying, constant loneliness and constant unhappiness makes me feel like i have absoutely no purpose at all and the whole world would be better off without me. i have the most wondeful girlfriend ever, but i feel bad. she shouldn't be with me, she could do so much better. everyone who is connected to me could do so much better. i feel like i'm absolutely nothing. i hate myself, even though i try not to. i'm just an epic failure. things will never change!!!


steph, you will bounce back from this man, this shit comes and it goes, god damn puberty when the light at the end of the tunnel starts to form, you will feel that weight get off your chest you just have to be confident in yourself, before 7th grade, i couldnt even talk in front of the class let alone try and speak my true feelings to anyone important to me, i'v moved around alot, always jumpin from school to school, it felt like every school i went too i had to start over on my self esteem and my confidence, after awihle i just realized im me, and for better or for worse, this is what and who i am for the rest of my life, so making the best out of everything WAS a constant battle, but finally i started realizing, hey man i do kick ass, i am cooler then these other kids, you have an amazing girlfriend, that is freakin ground zero stephen, you got someone who ultimatly cares about your being, as much as they care about theres and that is awesome man. you're purpose is too serve you for you, be who you are, enjoy being who you are, and CONTINUE to enjoy being who you are, the first start is finally relizing that without YOU this world would be even shittier, you brighten peoples days without even realizing it man trust me, ive seen some of the thigns you post you are a great person, if i were you, i would do what i did when i felt like shit all the time, i got a notebook and a pen, and just wrote ALL my thoughts down when i was feeling upset or my mind loaded, and at the end of the week i would go back and read what i wrote.. when i wasnt in a 'down' mood, and then it made me realize how ridiculous i was sounding, life has its rollercoaster moments, and will for the rest of our life but believe me stephen you WILL make it to the other side , have faith and trust bro, keep on kickin man, and make it do what it do.


-davey

And Shepherds we shall be, for thee, my Lord, for thee.
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
that Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy command.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
and teeming with souls shall it ever be.
In Nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti.
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