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Old May 25th, 2009, 01:39 PM   #1
Θάνατος
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Default Today Sucks

I feel all abandoned today. My family has not talked to me all day and I have to go to the cemetery soon to pay respects to my son that was still born almost 3 years ago now. It used to be not so bad when i had someone to go with me. I will go with my dad but he is so cold and never shows any emotion.

I just wish at times that when my son died I would have died with him.

I miss my son that is living because his mom won't let me see him. I have no one who I can really talk to and tell my feelings too.

I feel all abandoned and I feel like killing myself. I know that is not the answer but it hurts so bad to be all alone. I just want to be held and I know that won't happen.
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Old May 25th, 2009, 01:50 PM   #2
STAYING_STRONG4HIM
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Default Re: Today Sucks

I don't know how it is to lose a child, but I do know how it feels to lose someone...It does hurt...and it really never stops hurting...I know what it feels like to feel all alone...I have been ignored....
here's a thought...they could be ignoring you because they really do not know what to say and they don't want to make you hurt more. They probably just do not want to make you cry so they just try and ignore it all and pretend it never happened....
That's what a lot of my friends used to do. They didn't want to upset me more so they never would talk about it...everytime I would try and tell them something they would ignore it...
Killing yourself is not the answer...think of your son that is alive...even if you can not see him...there may be a possibility that you can see him someday...and even if you can't some day he may want to meet you when he is old enough...how do you think he would feel if he found out his dad killed himself?

Hey if you need to vent...I am always here...just PM me..

Heidi
"Recalling all your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy." -- 2 Timothy 1:4
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Old May 25th, 2009, 09:38 PM   #3
IAMSAM
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Default Re: Today Sucks

I'm really sorry for you, Rob. I'm not sure it gets much worse than the death of a child, especially when you're all alone and have no one to support you or provide some comfort. We should talk.

I think you're going thru a lot right now, and if it's not comforting to go to the cemetery b/c you don't have the presence and support of a living person to comfort you, then maybe you shouldn't go. The last thing you need is another reminder of the loss you're so acutely experiencing. If you DO go, make sure you take extra good care of yourself and be extra nice to you, you'll need that.

Find me on Skype if you need to.

Sam
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Old May 26th, 2009, 10:12 PM   #4
Nihilus
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Default Re: Today Sucks

I'm very sorry for you.

"Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The Force shall free me."
―The Code of the Sith
Darth Nihilus, Lord of Hunger
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Old May 26th, 2009, 11:30 PM   #5
Antares
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Default Re: Today Sucks

Rob. I know I have been busy and not active lately, but you can ALWAYS talk to me. Just say the word and I will drop everything and talk to you. Even if its about some random stuff like Gamma Ray Bursts.

I am sorry for your loss. Eventhough I have known you for like a year, I have never known that you lost a child. But you should just try to accentuate the positives in life and keep trucking along.

Good luck






~Laura was here~
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Old May 28th, 2009, 05:36 PM   #6
Θάνατος
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Default Re: Today Sucks

Thanks for all of your support. I do appreciate the kind words.

I am doing better now. It was really bad on Monday especially since I was all alone for the first time in a while. I just need to keep more active aqnd try to earn more money so I will have about $500 when I go to Chicago later on this summer.

Last edited by Θάνατος; May 28th, 2009 at 05:44 PM.
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