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Old April 14th, 2017, 02:53 PM   #1
Phosphene
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Join Date: May 27, 2016
Location: The Crystal Kaleidoscope
Age: 17
Gender: Cisgender Female
Blog Entries: 22
Default I'm failing.

There is nothing I want more than to get rid of this sadness I'm plagued by. I'm getting more clingy to the people I'm closest to and at the same time I'm hurting them by taking my emotions out on them. That is the last thing I want to do. I feel horrible for saying that I will never hurt them when I think I've done just that. At some point I'm afraid that I'll end up being completely alone because they'll all leave. I want it all to stop now, this is breaking me. I just want to be a good person, a good friend, and I'm failing miserably.

"The question is, what color will everything be at that moment when I come for you? What will the sky be saying?" ~Death, from The Book Thief
The Treasure Trove 🦄 Probe My Mind

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Gawd dammit the mods r so cruel.
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I just food and I still have a hungry.
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Originally Posted by an anonymous, totally Satanist and Socialist ginger
Satan was kicked out for being different
God must be a republican
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Old April 16th, 2017, 03:14 AM   #2
Emilyyy
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Name: Emily
Join Date: December 25, 2016
Location: Scotland
Gender: Female
Default Re: I'm failing.

Definitely know what you're talking about. I think the only thing you can do is be aware that it's happening and try and control it. Maybe try and find a different way to express your feelings and emotions like a diary or through art if you are an arty person (I'm not). Though I'm sure your friends care for you lots and won't just up and leave.

I'm 15 and live near Glasgow, Scotland. I consider myself to be a girly girl and always up for a laugh.
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Old April 16th, 2017, 09:47 AM   #3
KatieCO2003
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Name: Katie
Join Date: March 31, 2017
Location: Mountains of Colorado, USA
Age: 14
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Default Re: I'm failing.

Since I got here, you've been the kindest person of all. If I knew you IRL, I'd give you a big hug.
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Old April 16th, 2017, 11:23 AM   #4
Phosphene
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Join Date: May 27, 2016
Location: The Crystal Kaleidoscope
Age: 17
Gender: Cisgender Female
Blog Entries: 22
Default Re: I'm failing.

Thanks to both of you for your replies. Since posting this I've actually had some much-needed conversations with a few friends. Not really about what I'm going through, just a deeper communication than we've been having lately and it was really great. I'm oversensitive and if I lash out at people I care about--which is rare--and they react just as hostile, it takes a huge toll on me. So I try to keep a grasp on my emotions so they and I don't get our feelings hurt.

"The question is, what color will everything be at that moment when I come for you? What will the sky be saying?" ~Death, from The Book Thief
The Treasure Trove 🦄 Probe My Mind

Quote:
Originally Posted by Desynchronized View Post
Gawd dammit the mods r so cruel.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Special One View Post
I just food and I still have a hungry.
Quote:
Originally Posted by an anonymous, totally Satanist and Socialist ginger
Satan was kicked out for being different
God must be a republican
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Old April 18th, 2017, 12:00 AM   #5
BlackParadePixie
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Name: Fiona
Join Date: September 22, 2014
Location: San Diego, CA
Age: 18
Gender: Female
Default Re: I'm failing.

Heart to heart conversation are (usually) always good.

18 - f - Wes Anderson fan - proud Italian-American - future UCLA Bruin

But for now we are young
Let us lay in the sun
and count every beautiful thing we can see


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