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Old May 28th, 2016, 11:04 AM   #21
outback4
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

I feel like if someone's beating you up, whether it's a girl, boy, whatever, you just have to defend yourself. I know someone said you tried to fight back. If you're in a situation where she or someone else is trying to get in a fight with you or something, you just need to avoid it. You need to find a new route home, move to the other side of the street, or just keep walking and push through her. And if for some reason she still tries to hurt you, do what you can to stand up for yourself.

If you're scared about what your dad will think or whatever, you really can't let it worry you. You can either just not talk about it unless he brings up what he heard, or you can ask him for advice/help. But if you want his advice or help, don't worry about what he thinks about it being a girl and let that stop you. Don't let that get in the way.

I hope it all works out for you. Just stand your ground and have confidence in yourself, that's the most important thing you can do.
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Old May 28th, 2016, 03:10 PM   #22
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

@outback4 makes a good point about your dad. Don't worry about what he thinks. He's your dad and he loves you I'm sure. And he only want you to be safe and happy. I'll bet he would want you to talk to him about this so he can give you his advise and help you. That's what dads are for
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Old May 28th, 2016, 04:32 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by TJreversed View Post
I want to brutally honest here so don't take offense ok?
You said I'm starting to feel a little better by the day about the whole thing, but it's definitely gonna take some time getting use to being scared of a girl."
Right there, that's the statement I'm concerned with. She already won every single altercation in your future.

Shea s bully, and your being afraid is literally the pulse of her hear beat, she's a
Ready won. So unles your up for the challenge of standing up for yourself, then just give up because she's not guna stop, till you give up or she's satisfied,

Like everyone's been saying, there's no shame here, fights happen. Believe me, fights happen and for fucked up reasons to. If you do nothing, it'll keep happening, over and over and over again. And everytime, your beating will be worse and worse. May not be physicall, those wounds heal. Those are easy huh?.
oh for sure I'm gonna stand up for myself if she tries to fight me again, but I will be trying everything to avoid that. What I meant by " getting use to being scared of a girl is" that it's something new to me and never thought I ever would be afraid of a girl, especially of a girl who is considered one of the best looking girls in the school. It's a weird and humbling feeling that I'm not use to, but I'm learning to accept and feel better about especially with everyone saying gender is no big deal and there's no shame losing to a girl. As for her trying to beat me up again, I don't think she will, she would have tried again by now and she's been leaving me alone all week. And I will be talking about it with my dad just to get it off my chest, just waiting for the right time. Most likely this weekend
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Old May 28th, 2016, 04:40 PM   #24
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

I'm not suggesting you go out looking for a fight, that's the wrong thing to do, but to let anyone, not just a girl, keep you so scare of them, then the end already won. Think about it. It's really not much difference than a terrorist group attacking a defenseless country, only on a smaller scale, much smaller. May be an extreme example, but the concepts are the same.

A avoiding her is a good idea, you both obviously don't get along for what ever reason, so just stay away the best you can. But me, I would run, and I wouldn't go changing my life around just so she can continue hers as she pleases. You have a right to go where you like and live in peace. And if someone decides to try and destroy that on you, they need to know there will be consequences for their actions. What ever that means.

Talking to your dad I think is a great idea. You may feel embarrassed, offline this a difficult conversation, but trust me, your not the first dude to get beat up by a bitch bully bro ok?

Last edited by Just JT; May 28th, 2016 at 05:34 PM.
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Old May 28th, 2016, 09:29 PM   #25
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

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oh for sure I'm gonna stand up for myself if she tries to fight me again, but I will be trying everything to avoid that. What I meant by " getting use to being scared of a girl is" that it's something new to me and never thought I ever would be afraid of a girl, especially of a girl who is considered one of the best looking girls in the school. It's a weird and humbling feeling that I'm not use to, but I'm learning to accept and feel better about especially with everyone saying gender is no big deal and there's no shame losing to a girl. As for her trying to beat me up again, I don't think she will, she would have tried again by now and she's been leaving me alone all week. And I will be talking about it with my dad just to get it off my chest, just waiting for the right time. Most likely this weekend
I really hope everything works out for you. I understand that talking to your Dad and accepting the whole thing might not be easy but as time passes you will forget about the whole thing.
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Old June 5th, 2016, 09:53 PM   #26
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I finally told my dad about the fight and I feel a lot better, and like I expected he pretty much knew ever since that day she was taunting me with him nearby that me and her must of scraped and she got the better of me and that's how I really got my face messed up. Surprisingly he didn't really seem to be bothered or make a big deal about me losing to a girl. He just said "we all take our lumps in fights from time to time and said one of my uncles friends got beat up by a girl after a baseball game when he was around my age. So don't let it bother me and also told me "for every boy that's in your school somewhere in the world there's a girl their age who can beat them up." (Think he was just trying to cheer me up.) As for her, apart from her bragging about how she gave me the black eyes and stuff, she's pretty much left me alone ever since and hasn't gone out of her way to fight me again.
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Old June 5th, 2016, 10:00 PM   #27
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

That's really cool tom, I'm glad it all worked out for you like that.
Thanks for coming back and updating also, that was cool....
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Old June 5th, 2016, 10:22 PM   #28
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I finally told my dad about the fight and I feel a lot better, and like I expected he pretty much knew ever since that day she was taunting me with him nearby that me and her must of scraped and she got the better of me and that's how I really got my face messed up. Surprisingly he didn't really seem to be bothered or make a big deal about me losing to a girl. He just said "we all take our lumps in fights from time to time and said one of my uncles friends got beat up by a girl after a baseball game when he was around my age. So don't let it bother me and also told me "for every boy that's in your school somewhere in the world there's a girl their age who can beat them up." (Think he was just trying to cheer me up.) As for her, apart from her bragging about how she gave me the black eyes and stuff, she's pretty much left me alone ever since and hasn't gone out of her way to fight me again.
Wow Tom, be glad your dad was so nice and supportive. That must feel really nice. And really everything he said is so right too. So glad this worked out for you.
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Old October 1st, 2016, 04:44 AM   #29
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Heard something on some radio show recently similar to my situation about a boy feeling depressed about getting beat up and bullied by a girl. Just wanted to update in case there's any guy's out there going through the same thing but are afraid to discuss it. I saw the girl who beat me up over the summer and she still was taunting and talking crap about how she beat me up and was saying some of her high school girlfriends will probably beat me up too. Ect.. So far this first year of high school nothing major has happened other than a few instances of her trying to intimidate and scare me, like pushing me and tripping me a little in the hallway during the first week of school. It shook me up and botherd me again even though she was just messing around with me.


So about week and a half ago I was in the cafeteria during lunch and I could see her smiling and punching her fist into her hand looking at me. It got me a little nervous but not to bad. But later at the end of the day I was walking down and around the south hallway and her and a few kids where there and she shoved me hard into the lockers and stepped up close face to face looking me straight in the eyes then pushed me again. And said " are u scared" I could hardly talk because I was so nervous (remember this girl beat me up pretty good worse than any guy ever has) but I did muster up and said "yeah" and admitted to her front of the other kids standing there, but I think even if I said nothing she could tell just by the fear in my eyes and the way she was looking at me as she backed away she could see she had put the fear of God in me. But ever since that day she's left me alone and hasn't even come near me, almost like she's either tired of teasing me or respects that I admitted to her I'm afraid of her. So if any guys are going through the same thing, don't feel ashamed, it happens. It botherd me a lot too at first, but it's not the end of the world. I've come to accept that there's girls out there capable of kicking my ass and not let it consume me and be bummed out over it.
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Old October 1st, 2016, 08:51 AM   #30
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Default Re: Boy coping with being beat up by girl

I'm glad you were able to overcome all this issue. I'm afraid she might still try to threaten or provoke you, but at least now you have this situation in control, more or less. I must say this is an unusual form of bullying, since male bullies often try a more physical approach, while girls prefer psychological bullying (insults, demasculinisation, etc...). At least that's what happened in most cases I know.


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Old October 1st, 2016, 04:20 PM   #31
Tom D
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That's a really accurate way to describe it because that's how I felt (demasculinized) at first. Almost like she knows she can probably kick my ass any day of the week so she has the need to toy with me mentally with my fear of her. There's definitely a part of me that still feels a bit humbled about being this intimidated by a girl, but I've learned to accept it and not fret about the whole gender aspect of it nearly as bad.

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Old October 2nd, 2016, 01:21 PM   #32
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What got her to target you specifically? Do you know?

It's totally abuse and this is one of those scenarios where it is not the greatest outcome, but you can fight back despite her being a girl.

If you can get any witnesses of stuff to tell a vice principal or disciplinarian about what she's been doing.

Trust me school officials pay attention to that stuff now because they afraid of the bullied being so bottled up angry they cause the school to be on national news.

Tell somebody.
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Old October 5th, 2016, 03:26 PM   #33
Tom D
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Nah we're cool now thank god. Seen her outside school today with one of her friends
and she said "dude u don't have to look so scared I'm not really gonna kick your ass again" got talking to her, and it turns out the main reason she beat me up in the first place was because she thought I was one of the kids who last spring wrecked and threw her younger cousins bike in the river which I wasn't . I just happen to be there that day fishing and one of her friends saw me talking to one of the kids that actually threw it, and thought it was me or thought I was in on it though. I told her I would never do something like that, and I didn't even know who's bike that it was or who the kids were , they mIght of been from out of town. Wow all of this over some big misunderstanding, and now that I think about it, I think she did mention something about a bike while we where grappling around on the ground during the fight. I'm just glad this is behind us now though and I don't have to worry about getting my ass kicked again! And the very least If others have gone through something like this, I can tell them not to stress to much or worry about it or make a big deal if a girl has beat them up, and thanks BTW a lot for everyone on here that's helped me out with this as well!

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Old October 5th, 2016, 04:33 PM   #34
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Nah we're cool now thank god. Seen her outside school today with one of her friends
and she said "dude u don't have to look so scared I'm not really gonna kick your ass again" got talking to her, and it turns out the main reason she beat me up in the first place was because she thought I was one of the kids who last spring wrecked and threw her younger cousins bike in the river which I wasn't . I just happen to be there that day fishing and one of her friends saw me talking to one of the kids that actually threw it, and thought it was me or thought I was in on it though. I told her I would never do something like that, and I didn't even know who's bike that it was or who the kids were , they mIght of been from out of town. Wow all of this over some big misunderstanding, and now that I think about it, I think she did mention something about a bike while we where grappling around on the ground during the fight. I'm just glad this is behind us now though and I don't have to worry about getting my ass kicked again! And the very least If others have gone through something like this, I can tell them not to stress to much or worry about it or make a big deal if a girl has beat them up, and thanks BTW a lot for everyone on here that's helped me out with this as well!
Ugh she based her revenge on weak information.

Geez if someone's going down that road make sure you do your research first.
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