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Old October 3rd, 2007, 07:17 PM   #1
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Join Date: October 3, 2007
Gender: Undisclosed
Default I got some pestering problems

Hi ive been a suffer since i was bout 9, i dont really have things like counting letters, or stepping on cracks, but more so unwanted thoughts, altho i do hoard unwanted items and i belive thats a symptom too.

But its like this,
I work at a child care, i am religous and i love my family very much, and it seems like i get disturbing thoughts about everything im in conjunction with, i might think a bad thought about a child or i want to harm my family and blasmhous (spelling?) thoughts about god! Now i know in my heart im not that kind of person but i have learned to live with the thoughts and they have become less pestering, but another problem arise,

Im not sure if this is OCD but i would like to know what it is,

Some times i feel bad for things i did when i was a kid, im 18 now btw.
Now atm i keep feeling guilty because of this.

When i was about 12 or 13 i was just playing around with a brothers friend on the beds, now there was nothing to it, just kids being kids, like my thing accidently touched hers ( we had clothes on of course), it was just like if someone accidently brushed agaisnt ya, and as soon as that happened, i had a thought about sex, something i didnt want to think because she was only like 7, (even if i did mean it, i was only 12 and it shouldnd bother me ) now im sure it was a ocd thought because as soon as it happened i hoped down because it disturb me, now i keep thinking, was i up there for a reason?, and i keep replaying the even over and over in my head to prove myself i did nothing wrong, i know in my heart i did nothing wrong but my brain says other wises, so is that part of OCD too? making a real life event annoy u?
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