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Old April 29th, 2010, 05:02 PM   #1
Mr. Smithers
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Default Suicide

Suicide is never the answer, the following contains information, questions, and common misconceptions about suicide.


General Questions.


"People who talk about suicide won't really do it."

Almost everyone who commits or attempts suicide has given some clue or warning. Do not ignore suicide threats. Statements like "you'll be sorry when I'm dead," "I can't see any way out," -- no matter how casually or jokingly said may indicate serious suicidal feelings.

"Suicide is a good last resort to whatever problem one faces."

Suicide is NEVER the answer. It will not heal or solve whatever problem one has.

"Anyone who tries to kill him/herself must be crazy."


Most suicidal people are not psychotic or insane. They must be upset, grief-stricken, depressed or despairing, but extreme distress and emotional pain are not necessarily signs of mental illness.

"If a person is determined to kill him/herself, nothing is going to stop him/her."

Even the most severely depressed person has mixed feelings about death, wavering until the very last moment between wanting to live and wanting to die. Most suicidal people do not want death; they want the pain to stop. The impulse to end it all, however overpowering, does not last forever.

"People who commit suicide are people who were unwilling to seek help."

Studies of suicide victims have shown that more then half had sought medical help within six month before their deaths.

"Talking about suicide may give someone the idea."


You don't give a suicidal person morbid ideas by talking about suicide. The opposite is true --bringing up the subject of suicide and discussing it openly is one of the most helpful things you can do.

What Can I Do To Help Someone Who May Be Suicidal?

1. Take it seriously.
Myth: “The people who talk about it don't do it.” Studies have found that more than 75% of all completed suicides did things in the few weeks or months prior to their deaths to indicate to others that they were in deep despair. Anyone expressing suicidal feelings needs immediate attention.

Myth: “Anyone who tries to kill himself has got to be crazy.” Perhaps 10% of all suicidal people are psychotic or have delusional beliefs about reality. Most suicidal people suffer from the recognized mental illness of depression; but many depressed people adequately manage their daily affairs. The absence of “craziness” does not mean the absence of suicide risk.

“Those problems weren't enough to commit suicide over,” is often said by people who knew a completed suicide. You cannot assume that because you feel something is not worth being suicidal about, that the person you are with feels the same way. It is not how bad the problem is, but how badly it's hurting the person who has it.


2. Remember: suicidal behavior is a cry for help.
Myth: “If a someone is going to kill himself, nothing can stop him.” The fact that a person is still alive is sufficient proof that part of him wants to remain alive. The suicidal person is ambivalent - part of him wants to live and part of him wants not so much death as he wants the pain to end. It is the part that wants to live that tells another “I feel suicidal.” If a suicidal person turns to you it is likely that he believes that you are more caring, more informed about coping with misfortune, and more willing to protect his confidentiality. No matter how negative the manner and content of his talk, he is doing a positive thing and has a positive view of you.

3. Be willing to give and get help sooner rather than later.

Suicide prevention is not a last minute activity. All textbooks on depression say it should be reached as soon as possible. Unfortunately, suicidal people are afraid that trying to get help may bring them more pain: being told they are stupid, foolish, sinful, or manipulative; rejection; punishment; suspension from school or job; written records of their condition; or involuntary commitment. You need to do everything you can to reduce pain, rather than increase or prolong it. Constructively involving yourself on the side of life as early as possible will reduce the risk of suicide.

4. Listen.
Give the person every opportunity to unburden his troubles and ventilate his feelings. You don't need to say much and there are no magic words. If you are concerned, your voice and manner will show it. Give him relief from being alone with his pain; let him know you are glad he turned to you. Patience, sympathy, acceptance. Avoid arguments and advice giving.

5. ASK: “Are you having thoughts of suicide?”
Myth: “Talking about it may give someone the idea.” People already have the idea; suicide is constantly in the news media. If you ask a despairing person this question you are doing a good thing for them: you are showing him that you care about him, that you take him seriously, and that you are willing to let him share his pain with you. You are giving him further opportunity to discharge pent up and painful feelings. If the person is having thoughts of suicide, find out how far along his ideation has progressed.

6. If the person is acutely suicidal, do not leave him alone.
If the means are present, try to get rid of them. Detoxify the home.

7. Urge professional help.
Persistence and patience may be needed to seek, engage and continue with as many options as possible. In any referral situation, let the person know you care and want to maintain contact.

8. No secrets.
It is the part of the person that is afraid of more pain that says “Don't tell anyone.” It is the part that wants to stay alive that tells you about it. Respond to that part of the person and persistently seek out a mature and compassionate person with whom you can review the situation. (You can get outside help and still protect the person from pain causing breaches of privacy.) Do not try to go it alone. Get help for the person and for yourself. Distributing the anxieties and responsibilities of suicide prevention makes it easier and much more effective.

9. From crisis to recovery.
Most people have suicidal thoughts or feelings at some point in their lives; yet less than 2% of all deaths are suicides. Nearly all suicidal people suffer from conditions that will pass with time or with the assistance of a recovery program. There are hundreds of modest steps we can take to improve our response to the suicidal and to make it easier for them to seek help. Taking these modest steps can save many lives and reduce a great deal of human suffering.



WARNING SIGNS

Conditions associated with increased risk of suicide

* Death or terminal illness of relative or friend.
* Divorce, separation, broken relationship, stress on family.
* Loss of health (real or imaginary).
* Loss of job, home, money, status, self-esteem, personal security.
* Alcohol or drug abuse.
* Depression. In the young depression may be masked by hyperactivity or acting out behavior. In the elderly it may be incorrectly attributed to the natural effects of aging. Depression that seems to quickly disappear for no apparent reason is cause for concern. The early stages of recovery from depression can be a high risk period. Recent studies have associated anxiety disorders with increased risk for attempted suicide.



Emotional and behavioral changes associated with suicide
* Overwhelming Pain: pain that threatens to exceed the person's pain coping capacities. Suicidal feelings are often the result of longstanding problems that have been exacerbated by recent precipitating events. The precipitating factors may be new pain or the loss of pain coping resources.
* Hopelessness: the feeling that the pain will continue or get worse; things will never get better.
* Powerlessness: the feeling that one's resources for reducing pain are exhausted.
* Feelings of worthlessness, shame, guilt, self-hatred, “no one cares”. Fears of losing control, harming self or others.
* Personality becomes sad, withdrawn, tired, apathetic, anxious, irritable, or prone to angry outbursts.
* Declining performance in school, work, or other activities. (Occasionally the reverse: someone who volunteers for extra duties because they need to fill up their time.)
* Social isolation; or association with a group that has different moral standards than those of the family.
* Declining interest in sex, friends, or activities previously enjoyed.
* Neglect of personal welfare, deteriorating physical appearance.
* Alterations in either direction in sleeping or eating habits.
* (Particularly in the elderly) Self-starvation, dietary mismanagement, disobeying medical instructions.
* Difficult times: holidays, anniversaries, and the first week after discharge from a hospital; just before and after diagnosis of a major illness; just before and during disciplinary proceedings. Undocumented status adds to the stress of a crisis.



Suicidal Behavior

* Previous suicide attempts, “mini-attempts”.
* Explicit statements of suicidal ideation or feelings.
* Development of suicidal plan, acquiring the means, “rehearsal” behavior, setting a time for the attempt.
* Self-inflicted injuries, such as cuts, burns, or head banging.
* Reckless behavior. (Besides suicide, other leading causes of death among young people in New York City are homicide, accidents, drug overdose, and AIDS.) Unexplained accidents among children and the elderly.
* Making out a will or giving away favorite possessions.
* Inappropriately saying goodbye.
* Verbal behavior that is ambiguous or indirect: “I'm going away on a real long trip.”, “You won't have to worry about me anymore.”, “I want to go to sleep and never wake up.”, “I'm so depressed, I just can't go on.”, “Does God punish suicides?”, “Voices are telling me to do bad things.”, requests for euthanasia information, inappropriate joking, stories or essays on morbid themes.



A WARNING ABOUT WARNING SIGNS

The majority of the population at any one time does not have many of the warning signs and has a lower suicide risk rate. But a lower rate in a larger population is still a lot of people - and many completed suicides had only a few of the conditions listed above. In a one person to another person situation, all indications of suicidality need to be taken seriously.

These websites will help you even more about suicide.

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
http://www.areason.org/

Suicide Hotlines

Here is a huge list of a bunch different helplines.

US Phone Numbers

American Suicide Survival Line
(National, 24/7)(888) SUICIDE (1-888-784-2433)
National Runaway Switchboard
(800) 621-4000
National "Youth" Crisis Line
(800) 999-9999
Friends for Survival, Inc. (support for survivors of suicide)
(916) 392-0664
National Mental Health Association
(800) 969-NMHA (6642)
Alcohol Abuse
(800) 356-9996
Alcoholics Anonymous World Services
(212) 870-3400
National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism
(301) 443-3860
National Depression Screening Project
(800) 573-4433
Domestic Violence Hotline
(800) 799-SAFE (7233)
NY Hotline (800) 621-HOPE (4673)
Day One-Pasadena / Altadena (drug abuse)
(626) 583-2755
National Institute on Drug Abuse
(888) 644-6432
Weight Control Information Network
(800) WIN-8098
Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender Youth support
(800) 850-8078
Gay and Lesbian Youth Talkline
(800) 773-5540
National AIDS Hotline
(800) 342-AIDS (2437)
HIV/AIDS Treatment Information Service
(800) 448-0440
National Sexually Transmitted Disease Hotline
(800) 227-8922
American Social Health Association
(800) 227-8922
National Herpes Hotline
(919) 361-8488
Health Advice Company
(888) ADVICE8,
(888) 238-4238
Herpes Resource Center
(800) 230-6039
American Social Health Association (chlamydial infection)
(800) 230-6039
National Women's Health Information Center
(800) 994-WOMAN (9662)
National Planned Parenthood
(800) 230-PLAN
Child Help USA
(800) 422-4453
STD Hotline (sexually transmitted diseases)
(800) 230-PLAN
National AIDS Hotline
(800) 342-2437
Youth Crisis Line
(800) 843-5250
R.A.I.N.N. (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)
(800) 656-4673
Morning After Pill Info
(888) 668-2528
Family Planning
(800) 942-1054
Child Abuse Hotline
(800) 540-4000


UK RESOURCES
The Samaritans
Call for anything, just for someone to talk to if you are upset, or especially if you are suicidal or thinking of cutting. They will not judge you, but will just listen. Calls are charged at local rates and may show up on a phone bill.
08457 909090
1850 609090 (ROI)

Childline
Specialise in dealing with under 18s. They can help you with domestic violence, bullying, and lots of other problems, and can also help put you in touch with more specific resources for your problem. The call is FREE and can be made from any phone box. (Free calls will not be itemised on a home bill).
0800 1111

N.S.P.C.C.
The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children provides a free helpline for all home issues concerning bullying, domestic violence, abuse, and other issues. FREE, again you can call from any phonebox. (Free calls will not be itemised on a home bill).
0800 800 500

Talk to Frank
Talk to Frank is a National drugs helpline. It deals with all drug-related issues for people of all ages, from smoking to serious drug addiction and crime related to drugs. They will not judge you, the call is FREE, and it is confidential. (Free calls will not be itemised on a home bill)
0800 776600

Refuge:
24-hr National Domestic Violence Helpline. Advice and resources for both parents and children suffering from domestic violence issues.
0870 599 5443



Australia
General
Kids Helpline
0800 55 1800
A National 24 Hour Telephone Counselling Service for Children and Young People in Australia
http://kidshelponline.com.au/
Kids Help Online is a national counselling service for young people aged 5 to 18 years. It is a free, anonymous and confidential service where kids can chat to a counsellor online.
Lifeline
13 11 14
Lifeline is a general crisis counselling and information service, provided by trained volunteers who are resourced by professional staff. Support is available 24 hours a day across Australia for the cost of a local telephone call.
SANE helpline
1800 688 382
Charity that specialises in metal health issues from depression, bipolar disorder through schizophrenia.
http://www.sane.org/
Youth Call (Southern Australia)
(08) 8277 4400
Counselling service for people with drug and alcohol problems and their family and friends.
Youthline (New South Wales)
(02) 9633 3666
The motto of Youthline is 'young people listening to young people'. Trained Youthline counsellors offer support and advice on all issues affecting young people 24 hours a day.
Salvo Care Centre (salvation army)
(02) 9331 2000
24 hour, suicide prevention
Samaritans
Youthline: 0893 88 2500 (Metro)
Freecall Countryline: 1800 198 313
http://www.thesamaritans.org.au/
24 hour helpline
Albany Samaritan Befrienders
0898 42 27 76
24 hour helpline
http://www.thesamaritans.org.au/
Lifelink Samaritans Inc.
Tasmania
0363 31 33 55
24 hour helpline
http://www.lifelinksamaritans.org/
The Samaritans Perth
Tel: 0893 81 5555
24 hour helpline
http://www.thesamaritans.org.au/
Other
Abortion Grief Counselling (Victoria)
1300 363 550
Child Abuse Prevention Services (New South Wales)
1800 688 009
Provides 24 hour crisis support counselling and ongoing support for victims, families and perpetrators in the child sexual assault area.
Child Protection and Family Crisis Service (NSW)
1800 066 777
This telephone line provides a 24 hour crisis counselling service in NSW.
Child and Family Protective Services (Northern Territory)
(08) 8962 4399
Provides emergency advice on issues dealing with child abuse.
Gay & Lesbian Switchboard (Victorian)
1800 63 14 93 (Country)
0398 27 85 44 (Metro)
Counselling, referral & information
National Association for Loss and Grief (Victorian)
0396 88 4768
Stopover Emergency Youth Accommodation (Victorian)
0393 47 0822
Alcohol and Drug Information Counselling Service
1800 422 599
Sexual Assault Counselling
(02) 9926 7111
(24 hour)
Domestic Violence Line
1800 656 463
(24 hours) (freecall)
Poisons Information Centre
13 1126


Canada

Kids Help Phone (Jeunesse, Jecoute)
1-800-668-6868
24 hour. Toll Free anywhere in Canada, English or French
http://kidshelp.sympatico.ca or http://jeunesse.sympatico.ca
Child Abuse Hotline
1-800-387-KIDS (5437)
Distress and Suicide Line (Northern Alberta only)
1-800-232-7288
AIDS/Sexually Transmitted Diseases Info
1-800-772-2437
Women's Assault Helpline
1-866-836-0511
Rape Crisis Center (Ontario)
(613)-562-2333
NB: This is long distance, so it would show up on the phone bill.
Parentline
1-888-603-9100
The same people who run the kids help line. This may be helpful to some teen parents out there, or to some paretns who may be trolling - sorry, strolling - the forum looking for insight.



South Africa Childline
08000 55555
Childline offers a 24 hour toll-free Helpline with trained counsellors to assist children, young people and their families.
http://www.childline.org.za/
Lifeline (National)
0861 322 322
LifeLine provides a 24 hour crisis intervention service available at no cost to all sectors of the community throughout Southern Africa regardless of race, religion or social standing. LifeLine offers primarily a confidential telephone counselling service, and regards itself as an emotional First Aid station.
http://www.lifeline.org.za/welcome.htm
National Aids Helpline
08000 12322
The AIDS Helpline provides a free national telephone counselling, information and referral service for those affected by and infected with HIV/AIDS.
http://www.aidshelpline.org.za/index.htm
Alcoholics Anonymous:
Johannesburg: (011) 483-2470
Cape Town: (021) 247-550
Durban: (031) 301-4959
Welkom: (041) 554-019
South African National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence:
Johannesburg: (011) 337-8400
Cape Town: (021) 930-6086
Durban: (031) 222-241
Welkom: (041) 551-927
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Old March 26th, 2011, 01:14 AM   #2
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For someone whos been on the edge of doing this, this is just amazing. Thank you
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Old April 21st, 2011, 04:40 PM   #3
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Likeee
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Old April 24th, 2011, 05:56 AM   #4
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this helped me
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Old April 24th, 2011, 09:55 AM   #5
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Default Re: Suicide

This completely just helped me with a friend.
Thanks.

It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking to the president, because what if he tells a funny joke and you laugh so hard you spit the toothpick out and it hits him in the face or something.
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Old May 4th, 2011, 12:04 PM   #6
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Well written

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Old May 6th, 2011, 04:40 PM   #7
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Default Re: Suicide

this thread is great! i tried not too long back and still suffer symptoms now, though i will never ever try again, it hurts too too too many people, and life is worth living no matter what the problems, though i found this out the hard way. and talking to someone always helps, especially if they have been in the saem situation, so thank you VT you saved my life
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Old May 24th, 2011, 09:05 AM   #8
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Default Re: Suicide

I'm hoping this might help me in future plus it also slightly helped me understand myself better in a strange way...
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Old May 27th, 2011, 04:56 PM   #9
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I tried twice in 3 weeks. I feel so ashamed of myself.
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Old May 29th, 2011, 09:13 PM   #10
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Default Re: Suicide

*hug* What matters is how you pick yourself back up. How are you doing?
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Old June 23rd, 2011, 03:22 PM   #11
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Default Re: Suicide

I find myself saying those same things . My parents and everyone else tell me to shut up . I'm scared .
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Old June 23rd, 2011, 04:07 PM   #12
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Default Re: Suicide

Stay strong and do whatever it is to keep yourself alive. Easier said then done, but just holding on is the only thing that kept me from attempting it more then times then I have, which is way more times then I'd like to admit. That, and listening to music, and making myself wait just another five minutes, then five more minutes, ext until I finally felt better.
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Old July 14th, 2011, 07:38 AM   #13
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Suicide is so solid to avoid as unhappy people are stuck on killing themselves and notice it as their simply way out. I knew someone who committed suicide and whilst he was receiving all kinds of treatment his thoughts the single way that he could be really happy was by finish his life of pain.
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Old July 25th, 2011, 02:02 PM   #14
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Default Re: Suicide

major cause of corruptin is suicide bombing .
Suicide makes the people of the society depressed.
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Old September 20th, 2011, 07:54 AM   #15
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Wow, thanks dude.. really helped.. and for someone who almost did it, this was epic thanks again

If people get you down, get up and kick em where it hurts

If you need to chat, PM me

Almost 16/MALE/ bi-curious or plain bi, not sure
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Old October 22nd, 2011, 03:18 PM   #16
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Default Re: Suicide

yea i think whoever wrote this is awesome to because lots of kids are killing themselves and even i thought about it one time when i was feeling real low about stuff and so many kids need to know that there not alone and someone cares about them.
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Old November 3rd, 2011, 10:37 PM   #17
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Default Re: Suicide

"Stay alive. Anyone can die."

Eleni / Abyssinian
20 / Female / Australia
Quote:
"When life demands your all, give it even more!" - CourageWolf
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Old November 5th, 2011, 04:05 PM   #18
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Default Re: Suicide

This has really helped me tonight, thankyou so much.

Stay strong everyone <3


Don't let anybody ever bring you down.
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Old November 6th, 2011, 01:44 PM   #19
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well written
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Old November 14th, 2011, 08:30 PM   #20
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Default Re: Suicide

About a month ago I went to one of my friends funerals. The facts have not fully fallen into place. All I have heard is that he drove home from school parked in his driveway, went into his house and said hello to his little brother who was the only one home at the time. He then proceeded to go to his room where he hung himself in his closet. He was just 18. His name is Zachary Bourg.

It came as a great surprise to all of his friends. Zach was a greatly loved and highly intelligent man. He had many friends but chose to keep his circle of close friends small. Zach was a quiet guy with the sunniest disposition and the greatest interest in life.

He only sent one text that could have hinted to his intent to commit suicide. He sent a message saying " Have you ever thought about suicide? Just wondering"
It didn't seem out of the ordinary due to his interest in the afterlife. We thought he was just trying to learn as much as he could, just like he always was. Three weeks after sending that message Zach took his life. I didn't learn of his death until the next morning. You can definitely say it was the worst school day I ever had.

Suicide of a friend cannot be described. The closest I can describe it is if you woke up one day and all the love, kindness, and light was drained from the world. Then imagine having every ounce of comfort torn from your body through tears and vomit! I was utterly sick!

At his wake I nearly threw up at the sight of his cold motionless body. I wouldn't wish this on my most hated enemy.

Take any mention of suicide seriously. Contact the police and send medical assistance to anyone you cannot physically obtain and keep watch on.
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