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Old March 28th, 2011, 04:33 PM   #1
Ex Psych Mod
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Name: Kathy
Join Date: January 17, 2010
Location: London, England
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Blog Entries: 5
Default Hmm..

I know i've posted in here before but I don't know.

I don't think I have OCD... but maybe I do. Just thought i'd get this straight here. I have a lot of people who think I do. My parents, some friends etc.

I've always been an obsessive person. The first thing i do when i get home is tidy my room, and there are certain ways things in my room have to be.

I have a thing about the dishwasher. The different size plates ALWAYS have to go in the right places.

My school work. I always have to be way ahead on my school work. Homework and stuff. I have to do it almost as soon as I get it. I don't do it because i'm scared of getting told off, or because i care about the work, I do it because I need the.. i don't know... obsession of it I suppose? I just need it to be done. I'm not sure if that makes any sense.

The same with my folders and things. I like to have something to do, and be obsessive about. I'll spend ages putting all my sheets in plastic wallets, and thena few weeks alter spend ages putting hole reinofrcers on all my sheets. I just like to have something to be obsessive and do... I guess. The other day I looked at one of my folders that was slightly out of order and ridiculous as it sounds it made me feel suicidal. Not suicidal as though I would act on it, but I had thoughts all the same.

I'm obsessive in other areas too, like my eating disorder obviously. My councellor said something about all my compulsions being about control. My compulsions being cutting, running away, eating disorders and tidying. He never said anything about obsessions though.

Does this sound like OCD? I'm really not sure because I know i'm very obsessive but :/

You brought hate, pills and knives,
And this is how the tale begins.
Itís your life, exist and wonder why.
When it only fails to work,
It only fails to work sometimes
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