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Old November 26th, 2010, 08:42 PM   #1
Punk_Kid
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Default "Happy" being depressed????

I'm not even sure if I know what I'm talking about but I can try.

Everytime I start to feel happy or better I feel "scared" and kind of literally sick to my stomach. I'm not sure if my depression has become a weird ass sort of "safe haven" or something. I feel more "relaxed" and "mellow-ish" when I'm depressed but when I start to feel happy idk. I just feel as if its some sort of foreign feeling that makes me feel very uncomfortable. I don't even really know what I'm talking about honestly.

Does anyone else kind of feel this way???

[CENTER]I love music! I listen to most any kind. And anime is awesome too. I watch Desert Punk, Gunslinger Girl and Cowboy Bebop.

Starting cutting again>.> and If you want to talk then send me a PM.
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Old November 26th, 2010, 08:47 PM   #2
hotandgay
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

yup i do
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Old November 26th, 2010, 08:47 PM   #3
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I get this! It's like sometimes when i'm just content i kind of feel lost... It's weird i agree.

You brought hate, pills and knives,
And this is how the tale begins.
Its your life, exist and wonder why.
When it only fails to work,
It only fails to work sometimes
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Old November 26th, 2010, 09:00 PM   #4
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

Yeah. And when your in a real shitty mood does it make you feel worse if you hear "happy" songs? Cuz when I'm feeling real bad I'll go in my room, turn on the radio, hear a happy country song and turn it off. Then I'll turn on my XBOX and play some of my more heavier/depressing music(rock and metal/screamo). Then after like an hour I start to feel "safer".

[CENTER]I love music! I listen to most any kind. And anime is awesome too. I watch Desert Punk, Gunslinger Girl and Cowboy Bebop.

Starting cutting again>.> and If you want to talk then send me a PM.
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Old November 26th, 2010, 09:04 PM   #5
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

i was happy when i was depressed...so listening to the metal/scremo music just made me feel numb and blank...i never really felt anything else but numb because i always listened to music
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Old November 26th, 2010, 09:49 PM   #6
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

Cutting and self harm Depression, loss and grief

Yeah happy music does sometimes miss me off when i'm like this, while depressing music can make me feel back where i know how to react. I'm fine with extreme happiness, i just hate that feeling in between happiness and sadness that's nothing.

You brought hate, pills and knives,
And this is how the tale begins.
Its your life, exist and wonder why.
When it only fails to work,
It only fails to work sometimes
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Old November 27th, 2010, 12:03 AM   #7
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I know how it feels, and I know exactly why it happens to me at least: everytime something even slightly good happens and I start to feel happy, something horrible happens and simply brings me back down, so whenever I realize I'm starting to feel happy, I get scared, wondering what will bring me down this time.
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Old November 27th, 2010, 02:54 PM   #8
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I hate that feeling but I get the exact same way. But lord knows you cant try to explain it to other people! They think your crazy as Hell. When I get happy for longer then, like, a few days I start to really miss how I was before even though I absolutely hate the depressed feeling. Theres nothing good about those feelings except that you find you can more easily cope with them. Theres less of an issue of being scared of losing it. And, when you deal with any kind of SI, you know you can easily relieve those feelings (unlike being happy wherewell, you have to go with it).

Its weird to be happy after so long of not being happy. You get so used to the feeling it becomes kind ofawkward.
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Old November 27th, 2010, 08:16 PM   #9
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I have theory why that happens. Ok so basically, the main purpose of our body is to adapt to surroundings and carry on the species and make it successful. Now, theres a group mentality on a sub-conscious level where if you don't feel needed or if you feel depressed due to rejection from people your body assumes you have been shunned by the group and makes you have the urge to harm or kill yourself so you can't reproduce and carry on "bad genes". But, there is another sub-conscious mentality that contradicts and basically causes this. It's a survivor mentality the same kind that people who have had/ are having traumatic long term experiences. It keeps them from driving themselves crazy to protect the species it makes them adapt positively. Now your body is very smart about the emotion hormones it sends off so it knows that emotionally your going to be depressed if you experience trauma so it takes the edge off the pain as an adaptation to prevent the body from long term trauma . So if you experience long term trauma ( depression etc.) your body isn't used to having the urge to discontinue itself yet surviving. Causing it to adapt. And then once you feel happy it knows you've been unhappy for a long time and doesn't want to set you off even more.

Yeah thats my theory. It was kind of convoluted and explained poorly but I hope it helped you understand

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"
- Eleanor Roosevelt


"If you hate me, die in a hole, if you love me you can live in it!"
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Old November 28th, 2010, 02:05 PM   #10
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

yes i no how u feel. what i feel is that i dont like feeling sad but if it goes away. it has never gone away. but i feel that if it does it will be scary im afraid ill lose me. I dont want to lose me. Things around me will change. Imafraid for some things to change. I dont want to be sad. But imafraid to lose that. So i let myself be sad. i dont no y. Its like i lived this way for so long i cant see myself living any other way. I wish i was like a normal teen. but im not and i cant. i hate that i like that but i do. i even hate me and i dont all at the same time. point is im afraid to lose depression.
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Old December 2nd, 2010, 12:11 AM   #11
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

When patients are depressed for a long period of time without any significant events, the began to feel comfortable, and used to the feeling, when a strange rare emotions comes up, your body does not know how to react and you feel "sick to your stomach" what i would recommend is talking to a psychologist and being prescribed antidepressants, they will stabilize your mood and increase feelings of happiness without feelings of sickness, also go to social events, were you are nothing but happy, this will increase the amount of happiness and help get your body used to this emotion. If i may, i would recommend going to a rave, nothing makes you happier than grinding on girls you have no idea of who they are, while strong fast passed sounds increase your heart rate, i would recommend a testing of x, but with long term depressed patients, x becomes the only source of serotonin release, which is anti-productive. Live life, you only have one.
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Old December 2nd, 2010, 02:30 AM   #12
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

i have the same feeling sometimes too. like i want to do stuff, like be social and find friends but every time i talk to someone or get close i feel werid and like i don't fit in and i just give and cralw back into my shell all depresed. it really weird

LIFE IS CRAZY! THE WORLD IS CRAZY! PEOPLE ARE CRAZY! BEING A HUMAN IS CRAZY! SO EVERY NOW AND THEN IT DOSENT HURT TO BE A LITTLE CRAZY
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Old December 2nd, 2010, 02:36 AM   #13
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

Quote:
Originally Posted by Theatheist of doom View Post
I have theory why that happens. Ok so basically, the main purpose of our body is to adapt to surroundings and carry on the species and make it successful. Now, theres a group mentality on a sub-conscious level where if you don't feel needed or if you feel depressed due to rejection from people your body assumes you have been shunned by the group and makes you have the urge to harm or kill yourself so you can't reproduce and carry on "bad genes". But, there is another sub-conscious mentality that contradicts and basically causes this. It's a survivor mentality the same kind that people who have had/ are having traumatic long term experiences. It keeps them from driving themselves crazy to protect the species it makes them adapt positively. Now your body is very smart about the emotion hormones it sends off so it knows that emotionally your going to be depressed if you experience trauma so it takes the edge off the pain as an adaptation to prevent the body from long term trauma . So if you experience long term trauma ( depression etc.) your body isn't used to having the urge to discontinue itself yet surviving. Causing it to adapt. And then once you feel happy it knows you've been unhappy for a long time and doesn't want to set you off even more.

Yeah thats my theory. It was kind of convoluted and explained poorly but I hope it helped you understand
^^^^^^^^ok that was pretty genious, even if it might be wrong i apprcieate the thought you put into that. but anyway i have the same feeling sometimes too. like i want to do stuff, like be social and find friends but every time i talk to someone or get close i feel werid, like i don't fit in and i just give and cralw back into my shell all depresed. its really weird

LIFE IS CRAZY! THE WORLD IS CRAZY! PEOPLE ARE CRAZY! BEING A HUMAN IS CRAZY! SO EVERY NOW AND THEN IT DOSENT HURT TO BE A LITTLE CRAZY
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Old December 7th, 2010, 07:33 AM   #14
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I felt like this the other night. I was at my best mates party on saturday night and there were quite a few people there most who i would call 'friends'. anyway most of them were in the pool earlier and I had been having fun and was happy for awhile, then a bit later they were all dancing and singing and having a great a time, while I just kind of stood to the side.

I suddenly had a crushing feeling like I never fit in anywhere, no one likes me and i have no true best friends. (i get this feeling a lot) anyway it prevented me from joining in the partying and I ended up in the dark by myself depressed again. luckily a couple of people noticed and came and kept me company, which proved I did have some friends, yet I still couldnt make myself be happy

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
'Coz she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks, no it don't break even.
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Old January 18th, 2011, 10:56 PM   #15
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

I can't really say I'm depressed i guess Im just anti-social and hate people and being happy. I also hate morning people. Im a creature of the night
I'm not emo but you would literally have to force me to smile. And nobody made me hate people i just like being alone listing to my beethoven, beetles, Trans-Siberian Orchestra, and other various music. I hate rap, country, and any current pop, rock, or heavy metal screamo music. YUCK!

[edit]Ha im like hannibal lecter[edit]

Yes, my lord.

Last edited by Sebastian Michaelis; January 18th, 2011 at 10:57 PM. Reason: Had an "epiphany" which is also a name of a TSO song
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Old January 19th, 2011, 12:25 PM   #16
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Default Re: "Happy" being depressed????

Please do not bump old threads

You brought hate, pills and knives,
And this is how the tale begins.
Its your life, exist and wonder why.
When it only fails to work,
It only fails to work sometimes
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