Thread: Coming Back
View Single Post
Old March 28th, 2008, 08:34 PM   #1
-Silence
...La De Dah!
 
-Silence's Forum Picture
 
Name: Heather, Duh.
Join Date: March 29, 2004
Location: The Sunshine State.
Gender: Female
Blog Entries: 111
Default Coming Back

I feel like I'm slipping back into Self Harm. I haven't done it but damn do I want to.
The urge hasn't gone away and it's been about two weeks that I've had this last urge. It's getting to the point where I dream about it again, all I keep thinking about it how good that razor will feel digging into my arm. How it'll fix everything and I'll start to feel okay again.

I'm craving it, I want to cut and I want to cut alot, I want to cut till my entire arm is covered, then go to bed and wake up and do it again. I miss it like crazy.

I work with a box cutter, as a stock person I'm opening boxes all day, today I missed the box and accidentally got my thumb, it felt amazing.

As much shame as the scars bring I want them. I want more.

Maybe I just want to feel alright, I'm not sure, I'm not sure what to do, how to keep pushing it away when lately it's all I think about.



“Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.”
-Calvin & Hobbes.
-Silence is offline   Reply With Quote