I know this is probably the last thing you want to hear...but i dont think you should rush back to him...
Its entirely up to you what you choose to do of course, as you know the situation better than any of us.
But from what you said in your post...more specifically:
Originally Posted by Jahstar
the reason i broke up with him was because i didn't feel like he deserved me he's too much of a good person...and i show no effort in talking or trying to meet him.....But it's not my fault...
You shouldnt be thinking like that!
You ARE good enough to be with anyone you want to be with, and you have the right to choose whoever that (LUCKY!!) person is! (within reason, of course
But seriously, damn, where is your self esteem?
I think it might be an idea to try and sort all the things and issues out with yourself before you bring anyone else into the mix.
Learn to be happy with yourself, that you can make it on your own!
If you rush back to this (the fact that, it is hurting so much this time and seeing how much you want to go back to him) what happens if your insecurities start up again? ...its only going to be worse next time...
Dont rely on someone else to love you, you have to do that yourself, and in turn people will follow suit!
Im not saying, dont EVER go back to him, Im just saying, if your going to try this relationship again, you need to sort out the reasons that it didnt work the first time.
You CAN do it, and i know you will if you want to!
Goodluck with everything!