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Old April 14th, 2006, 10:54 AM  
...La De Dah!
-Silence's Forum Picture
Name: Heather, Duh.
Join Date: March 29, 2004
Location: The Sunshine State.
Gender: Female
Blog Entries: 111
Default Not doing well (sorry)

Tomorrow will be three whole weeks without cutting, but honestly I don't think I can make it that far. It seems so little, so pathetic but it's a big deal to me. These last three or four days I've been like living in an urge, constantly I've been pushing it away but it builds up. It's too much. Too much for me to keep pushing away.

It's strange, I'll wake up and the first thing I see is my scar-covered arms and thats why I want to reach for a razor because I want to bleed, I want to feel it, and then I want to feel the relief it brings. So I'll wear long sleeves so my arms aren't visible to me but still there's that place on my arm thats begging to be ripped open.

I just don't know how long before I give in, I'm so sorry.

“Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.”
-Calvin & Hobbes.
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