I've read about it, which I know is nothing like experiencing it first hand but it seemed tough to fight.
"The Luckiest Girl In The World" is a novel about an ice skater that has it and cuts to stay clear headed, to stay, you know in control.
CAN DISSOCIATIVE DISORDERS BE CURED?
Yes. Dissociative Disorders are highly responsive to individual psychotherapy, or "talk therapy," as well as to a range of other treatment modalities, including medications, hypnotherapy, and adjunctive therapies such as art or movement therapy. In fact, among comparably severe psychiatric disorders, Dissociative Disorders may be the condition that carries the best prognosis if proper treatment is undertaken and completed. The course of treatment is longterm, intensive, and invariably painful, as it generally involves remembering and reclaiming the dissociated traumatic experiences. Nevertheless, individuals with Dissociative Disorders have been successfully treated by therapists of all professional backgrounds working in a variety of settings.
Something I found, so there is hope, you dont have to be like this your entire life.
Have you ever talk to your doctor about it?
Don't be sorry Bri, ever.