I'm like, very bored, very despondent, very sad, lonely. I dont know were these feelings are eminating from, I'm sure it's a mixture of not talking to anyone oustide of my family and online friends for days, not being outside unless I'm fishing for somthing in the car. I'm also moving with my family to hell, thats were it is, hell, I hate it. Leaving the few remaining friends I think I still have. perhaps not, I've lied to every single one of you, tellig you I'm fined when I'm really not, that I'm doing so well emotionally when I'm mentally falling apart. saying I have a cold when I'm crying. I don't know why, I just slip into these ditches somtimes. I tried writing poetry but couldnt. The people I love don't really talk to me anymore, those who do still talk to me, are to out of it to know what there saying in the first place. I want to die, its one of the first times in my life that I have wanted to die. Even when I was living on the streets I didnt want to die. I still had hope. and now life seems to be turning for the better, and I just keep getting more and more saddened. I look horrid, I'm not eating, I'm telling everyone I'm happy and fine. but I'm not. I don't know what to do, I just....don't konw anymore, this is one of the first times I have just not known what to do, or who to talk to, or were to go from here.
""The New Law of Righteousness," that there "shall be no buying or selling, no fairs nor markets, but the whole earth shall be a common treasury for every man," and "there shall be none Lord over others, but every one shall be a Lord of himself.""