Originally Posted by Vindication
My religion is hazy now. Like, its hard to stay close to what you believe with everything luring you away from it. In my town, there are no youth directed programs that suit me and help me in my faith. Like, its a tiny town with no oppurtunity it grow in my faith. I define myself as Christian yet don't think as one. I call myself faithful, yet thats the opposite of what i feel. Its complex. I yearn to grow closer to God. (Do not insult me on this) Yet I find it difficult to keep myself faithful. I don't care who you are, being faithful without support is damn near impossible.
It's true, faith dwindles unless you have a group of people to shore it up for you. In the years leading up to me becoming an Atheist, that's exactly what things like youth groups at church and "jesus camp" at summer did for me. But don't you notice that after getting that "boost for jesus" at camp or a youth group... you go right back to your "usual" and maybe "sinful" ways?
The point I realized after enough of that was that faith is fragile... it can't exist without support from others. Of course, I know think that faith itself is worthless (no offence). Faith is believing in something for NO good reason; that is, no evidence at all to support it. It's extremely illogical to have faith in ANYTHING, since all faith is blind.
You are a rational person, and I think that your thoughts are catching up to the small portion of your brain that keeps the "faith" part going. I know you want to "shore up" your faith, but I think it would be great for everyone to drop the faith thing altogether. Believe in what you believe for a GOOD reason; I'm an atheist because that is the DEFAULT position for belief in gods when absolutely NO evidence shows they exist. Keep thinking about your beliefs critically, and you may change your mind.