I've got a big problem about all this gay/bi thing... Please gelp me ...
Hmm, where to start?
Allright. I have always known that I might be bi. You, see, here, where I live, being gay and stuff is NO NO BAD BAD, no-one is gay. You can't talk about it out loud. ( To tell u the truth, I live in Northern Europe... in a small place you have never heard xD)
When I was younger I always liked boys... or at least i think so ? O.o
When I started junior high school about one and a half years ago... I realized that.. well.. I liked this one girl. I just thought about her all the time. How could I get to know her? How could I get close to her? How could I get to talk to her? Then, little by little, we became friends. Last christmas me, her and some other girls had a sleepoverparty. I don't remember anything about that night. XD Well, the only thing I remember is my crush sleeping with my pillow.
Now that girl is one of my best friends. Lately, we haven't been so much together.
One day I came out of closet, now everybody knows I am bi.
The shocking thing....
I have a boyfriend, we've been together.... for about 9 months. Yeah, no kidding... I love him so much(even though he is somewhat homophobic >
). He gave me my first real kiss. I've been thinking about my feelings and sexuality, so somehow I just didn't feel like kissing him once. Since then my boyfriend has been really... hmmm unpleasant company. It's like he's mad at me or something. :O BUT.. HE CAN'T FORCE ME TO DO ANYTHING!!! >
Wait.. it get's better... That girl I like(d) has a girlfriend now. I think I've gotten over her, cos we are such a good friends. I feel uncertain about my boyfriend and somehow I feel more and more curious about girls.
What should I do??? Should I leave that boy? I don't want to lose him as a friend... Is it even possible to be a friend after all this?
Sorry, my english sucks.... ^^