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Old September 17th, 2017, 09:27 AM   #1
Emily_
New Member
 
Name: Emily
Join Date: August 20, 2017
Gender: Female
Default Other ways to self harm?

Okay, so since my last post my depression has been getting better. I felt a lot better and enjoyed life more. Since I've gone back to school that's changed, a lot. I'm trying to keep a "stay positive!" vibe but its not working. Its not from the school work that's stressing me out, its the people. I've lost everyone I hang out with due to a stupid fight I had with someone. I only have one person that hangs out with me, and they are busy with clubs so I cant really talk to them..

This also sounds VERY weird but I almost feel like when i was heavily depressed everyone tried to make me happy and now that i am happy, I feel like everyone is trying to make me depressed again. I feel like no one cares about me, I feel like they only care when I say I'm suicidal just because they don't want me to die and they get blamed. I don't know. I feel like I'm blaming the wrong people, I feel like I'm trusting the wrong people..

Its gotten so bad that I want to self harm again, but i don't want to cut. My parents found out about my depression and will see my cuts. So i want another way to self harm..

I've tried some other ways but it doesn't make me feel "complete". I want something as bad as cutting. Yes I shouldn't be cutting, I really shouldn't. But its the only thing that keeps me in this.."okay" state of mind, if i don't, I just go complete suicidal.

Please help me. I cant keep going on like this..
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