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Old May 10th, 2017, 12:32 PM   #1
Name: T
Join Date: December 25, 2016
Location: Scotland
Gender: Male
Default I think I'm having an existential crisis

Hi guys. I'm sorry if this post is all over the place but I feel the to post about this situation I'm going through. This probably a bit of a bizarre story too.

Anyway, I'm 16 (turning 17 in summer) and I think I'm going through an existential crisis. I often feel out of place too as I'm not successful in school other than in music and music technology and I often question if I really have any friends as I feel they could leave me at any time. I prefer working alone however as I feel I have no one holding me back from what I'm trying to do and I think I'm better suited to being a "lone wolf" of sorts rather than being incredibly sociable.

Recently I've been sitting my final exams this year as I'm going to college soon and I had a clear idea of what career path I wanted to take, that being a sound engineer. I've been studying sound engineering for about 2 years and I am taking a college course for sound engineering. I'm afraid that if I continue to pursue a job in sound engineering I might get bored and feel like I wasted my time in school and college.

For a while now I feel like I don't want to do that as a job anymore. Recently I've began thinking of becoming a wrestler instead (I know, weird career change). The reason for the change to wrestling is because I have a weird crush on a famous female wrestler (even weirder now) although I'm really interested in the sport and being a wrestler has always been a small dream of mine since I was a child.

After thinking about the idea of becoming a wrestler I'm now always thinking about it and all the hard I would have to do get close to achieving that dream and all the things I would need to leave behind to pursue that dream. I would also most likely have to keep my job as a wrestler as a secret to my parents as they'd probably look down on the idea due to all the time I would have wasted learning how to be a sound engineer which wouldn't be ideal. I would also need to spend a few years getting in shape and getting enough training to get close to being a wrestler. I feel really passionate about becoming a wrestler now but like I said I would probably need to keep the idea hidden from everyone I know.

Along with those things I often feel depressed due to my non sociable nature and I am often bored with nothing to do, thanks to living in a small town with not a lot of places to go hangout.

Due to these things I don't feel like I've yet to find my place in the world and I've been questioning my existence and what I was meant for. If any has any advice on this issue it's be greatly appreciated and I'll reply to all comments.

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