feeling shit again
i know this isnt too much about depression but i dont know where else to put it
I though that most of my depression was going, but it isnt. In fact is kinda has returned, I'm sick of school, i am worrying about simple things like do i have the right books, or did i leave something in the last class ect, then im so worried on how i look. cos i have to wear a shitty uniform i look so differnt, i hate ti, so im really self concious. then its exam year for me, and they seem to be like piling the work on us now, and make us worry about it now, last year there was fuck all mentioend only in one or two classes, and now they are like you HAVE to work, you HAVE to study, you HAVE to stop having a life. Hence why i am doing study after school
then i have shit with my friends. my best friend fancies me, she wont stop tryin to hug me and she keeps doing kissing things to me. to be honest im afraid to be around her at times. she asked me to go out with her, and i said no and she was kinda crying, but im not straight!! plus i dont want to hurt rudi, which i wouldn't do to get a girl!
but the biggest problem is late nights and early mornings that get to me, i cant sleep at night for many reasons and when it's morning i just dont want to get up but i have to. and it doesnt make me happy. like today i nearly fell asleep in business.
and its only september........