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Old July 2nd, 2008, 06:28 AM  
kitkat92's Forum Picture
Join Date: April 26, 2008
Location: London
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

I love blonde jokes =)

Why are blondes only allowed 30 minute lunch breaks?
It takes too long to retrain them if they take an hour.

What does a blonde say after her doctor tells her that she's pregnant.
Is it mine?

How do you make a blonde laugh on a Saturday?
Tell her a joke on a Wednesday.

Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
You can park in the handicapped spots.

What is the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde?
There have actually been sightings of Bigfoot.

What is it called when a blonde dyes her hair brown?
Artificial Intelligence!!

What's black and blue and brown and laying in a ditch? A brunette who's told too many blonde jokes

Golf Balls
A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to of all people a beautiful, you guessed it, blonde. The blonde kept looking quizzically at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls."
Never-the-less, the blonde continued to look at him thought-fully and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"

Parked Car
Norman and his blonde wife live in Calgary. One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says "We are expecting 10 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Norman's wife goes out and moves her car again.
The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must par-" then the electric power goes out.
Norman's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplow can get through?"
With the love and understanding in his voice like all men who are married to blondes exhibit, Norman says "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"

A police officer arrives at an accident scene where apparently three blondes have leaped to their death from a very tall building.
Suddenly, the officer notices that one is still breathing so he approaches her and asks, "Why did you three beautiful girls leap out of that building?"
The blonde answers in a very weak voice, "We wanted to try out our new maxi-pads, with wings..."

A ventriloquist is touring clubs in Florida. With his dummy on his knees, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the audience stands on her chair and shouts, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and from reaching our full potential!"
The embarrassed ventriloquist starts to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little [email protected] sitting on your knee!"

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