I'm...very sorry. I guess i could also thank you for sharing this with me. (Its awkward that at this very moment that i'm reading about your loss, i'm listening to a song about someone losing someone close...) I've always considered joining the Armed Forces because my grades in Highschool arent average and College doesn't seem like possibility, so the Army was a last ditch option. Now that i have read about your brother, and his heroic, but nonetheless, death away from home, its makes me grief from him, and makes me angry at myself for ever considering joining the military just so i could be sent overseas and have a high percentage of getting shot or hit by an explosive and losing my life.
As for your family, don't listen to them. If thats what they say about your brother when you need help to recover, then they aren't worth grieving with.
(And no matter how old this thread is, i needed to post a reply, sorry VT...)