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Old July 8th, 2007, 12:18 PM  
Name: Jackson
Join Date: June 11, 2007
Location: Carluke, Scotland
Gender: Male
Default Wakening Up To Find A Unwanted Feeling .:Part II:.

This is part 2 of my story I suggest you read part 1 1st for this to make sense.

Oh and their might be some terms u won't understand if you don't live in Scotland, if so PM me.

Well the scene was set, I was so confused so set about accepting myself properly. First of all I stopped beating myself up for looking at other boys and having fantasys about, as i said in part 1, I was just enjoying my life instead of living a lie. This was alot easier said than done, after a while you start to feel empty when you want something you can't have. The nights I spent in my room, just thinking for hours and hours, until I was emotionaly tired. My eventual conclusion of how I might have a chance if i had the guts to tell them was abbliterated after a boy in my class "apparently" came out of the closet. And quess who he had a crush on, not me I can esure you but Nathan my weak spot. You might not understand what I mean by weak spot but to sum it up he was the one that could control me if he so desired, which is not what I desired. I always wanted to be the one in control of my life not have someone sitting on the high horse laying down the law and throwing their toys out the pram if they don't get it. That was more directed at adaults, namely teachers. Yes thats right the creators that calls themselfs human, when obviously after so many years of little bastards pushing it to far in class and the lazy minds to teach they become disolusioned. We all become the same personality in their minds and so get the blunt end of everything. Nathan and other people my age where different. Nathan always played what he had and he never seemed to take it for granted. By that I mean he always keeped the teachers happy with his outstanding work, he always won the girl with his daseling good looks and for some reason I don't really know why all the guys floacked to him like sheep wanting to be his mate. I doubted it could be a curious phase for everyone of them. Dispite all this power and glory he did not become disolusioned, he stood the same man as the average joe. He always was pleasent, funny and kind. Where as my other peers where somewhat different, the vast majority were greedy, selfish and would do anything and everthing to increase thei social status. They were evil bitter people who lived on the misery of their others. But when it came to the bigger boys, they didn't push it to far. They didn't like the sound of an eye for an eye, which is what happens eventualy bullys always get their turn in the end. You and me are not the only ones that don't like bullies even when their not picking on you. This is what I had to work with, fair dews not all where like this but more than enough where. This is why I live by these morals.
Live and let Live and An Eye For An Eye. Another personal favourite of mine would be Dog Eat Dog or in latain that would be "Canis Canem Edit". Just had to say the latain bit because I know it lol.

This is the end of PART II see PART III soon for continuation.
LateForTheSky is offline   Reply With Quote