I really don't get it, I really don't...
I don't get it!! *long postage beware* But I need some help!
My bf and I will be 6 months tomorrow. I am very happy, I really know I love him, more than any one I have ever before.
However, our communication is nutsy and up and down.
We talk well in person, when we're alone or with a lot of people. Occasionally we have our miscommunications when we misread each other.
It's our phone convos that suck. I don't understand him. Sometimes we have so much fun just chatting about nothing. Other times we there's silence because we don't know what to say, or I said something that annoys him. He kind of gives me an attitude. I'm a natural talker and yes, I TALK ALOT. He complains that I repeat myself, and complains that I talk to him about stupid things. I say well okay, if he told me sooner as i started to ramble on, I'd stop. I respect what he has to say and I know he respects me too. I just have so much trouble reading him. I already know he's not much of an emotion-telling guy, but he needs to start telling me some things. Which is what happened yesterday. He started to open up and tell me how he felt about things and what I was talking about and like how I made a big deal over nothing (it was a sticker). I listened and agreed.
He doesn't talk some times because he's afraid of saying something that will upset me. Not in a hurtful way, but he will say his opinion and it will offend me. He never wants to hurt my feelings, but it's happened before and he's afraid it will keep happening. That's why he feels like he can't tell me anything.
So I listened and told him, I said I was glad he told me all that and I understand what he was saying. I told him nothing will upset me as long as its because you're telling me the truth and its for the good of both of us. He should not be afraid to ever tell me how he feels because he knows I listen as much if not more than I speak. I know he knows that but sometimes I feel he thinks he kind of knows more than me, or is more right than me.
But I am intellegent and when I do speak I know what I'm saying or mean. And if I want to get really passionate, I will user bigger vocabulary. He knows that but might have a problem admitting it.
I just don't know what to say to him. He doesn't tell me sometimes what's on his mind if he's quiet and he just doesnt express his feelings in phone conversations. It kind of bugs me. And I have the tendency to repeat myself when no one is speaking. Yet, no one has the courage to hang up.
I just don't know how to open up the communication lines sometimes. We've had silly issues before, but resolve them (he usually gives himself time to cool off, then apologizes for being an ass). But I know these things are mostly his fault, but sometimes I don't make it any better.
I know that there's something strong between us because we're still together and I don't know anyone who believes as much as me.
this song lyric is what makes me believe:
"There's something about the look in your eyes
Something I noticed when the light was just right
It reminded me twice that I was alive
And it reminded me that you're so worth the fight"